Need Advice

[BM out]

This is my first time visiting this site, and i know its been along time coming.
Im 27, got drunk for the first time when i was 16. And since then its been on and off throughout college and until now I didnt really think anything of it. I have a strong family history of drinking problems. My mom is one of 7 and 2 of her brothers are recovering alcoholics, one brother is still an alcoholic and she just had a brother die of pancreatic CA from all the drinking and drugs.
My situtation is that within the last year I notice that every time I go out for a night on the town or whatever, I black out. Now there are times i wake up and dont even have a hangover, but other times i wake up still drunk or with a horrible hangover... I work long hours during the week and the weekends are my time to unwind. My bestfriend insists I dont have a problem because its not like im drinking every weekend or that I need to drink but when i do go out and drink i cant say no and end up blacking out. she says i black out because im tired not because i drink too much, i think its a little of both at times. I just would really like some insight from others and advice. I dont want to quit drinking all together, but i dont know if i have a problem. honestly i maybe go out like once a month, but if i do it doesnt fail this happens...please help...im at a loss....

[Bruunhilde]

Need Advice

Hi BMout, welcome!!!! I wish I'd visited a site like this when I was 27, then perhaps I would have been able to stop or get help, or maybe not. Since you're here, you're ahead of many your age. Kudos to you!

Alot of us, including me, have families full of drinkers and have histories just like yours.

I would ask, your best friend, does she need you to drink with her? I had serious damage done through my "best friend" pushing me to do beer, then weed, then this, then that, even tried to get me to binge and purge on food. Horrible. What a best friend. I've since disowned her. I was about your age when I did so.

Sometimes I remember things and sometimes I don't. Its such a terrible thing - you don't know whether to be ashamed or embarrassed - but you probably should be both, if you're like me. My big mouth! Big for drinking, big for talking and yapping it up with a nice social glass of wine in my hand.

If you can't stop at a drink or a few drinks, then try drinking non-alcoholic beer, that helped me for a time. I do think your pattern is not going the way you would want for your kids, for their futures, if you could look back 40 years from now and see them going through what you're going through, you'd be able to stop them or help them before they blacked out in the car, or with dangerous people in the bar nearby, or just escalated in use. With your family history, you're playing with fire. Your best friend may not understand that, but this is a spiral that can change your life and leave you with so many regrets and lost friends ....

[Bruunhilde]

Need Advice

OH, sorry, forgot to say there's alot of help here and many ways to approach the problem, once you decide that it's a problem you'd like to approach. Alot of people try to moderate, but many can't, so review the posts and ask questions, no dumb questions exist. We all have them and need to know. Be kind to yourself. Help yourself. Hugs...

[pompeyman]

Need Advice

hi welcome to the site i am 48 and have had several detoxes ...... i have lost 2 good jobs, my family anout to have to lose my flat , dont see my 13 and 12 yr old chlldren, have isolated myself from nearly all of my friends, am going thro yet another community detox (where they tell you to reduce by 25% a day) on valium ....again ...... you have got here in time ....... if you feel like it read my "rock botttom" thread on the general discussion forum where i have ..... for the first time gone into more detail ...... i functioned for years too then .... it all went to pot (so to speak!!!) when it fell to bits ......... you are only 27 well done for recognising your problem ......... ddont know if you have been to an AA meeting yet ..... its not for everyone but it helps some .... at least to recognise your difficulty ..... take care mate ...... please dont go down aas far as me ........ and i am alive!!!!! have a good day ..... you dont say where you live so if you are asleep take some positive actions tom .... take care PM x

[goingsobermum]

Need Advice

Stop listening to your friend. You know you have a problem. You pass out because your body can't cope with anymore alcohol and needs you to stop. You could try drinking less, its easy to think, 'its the weekend so I need to drink as much as possible to make up for all that I didn't drink in the week'. If you can change that mind set then you may be able to go out and just have a couple of drinks. I had to quit completely and once I got over the idea that you could only have fun if drunk I discovered that life can be fun sober too and that there are other ways of relaxing.
Endorphins from sport make a lot of difference too.
Keep reading on here, you'll find that you are not alone.

[bugz]

Need Advice

I'll tell you the start of my drinking and you can decide for yourself, I started drinking once a week
then within months it turned into twice a week then 3 and within a year I was drinking every single
day, fast forward 14 years later and I was almost as bad as the character in the movie "leaving
las vegas" with the exception that I didn't want to kill myself. I drank every day every time I
had a chance to I over did it and drank to excess.

The hardest part so far was my first two months of sobriety, I'm better now and I have some
hope that I can live without it, being a slave to a bottle isn't something any of us really
wanna end up as... but anyone can turn as bad as I did it's just a matter of how much
you drink and how often.

[Pride before Fall]

Need Advice

Hey Bugz, congratulations on 3 months! HUGE milestone. :clapclap:

[bugz]

Need Advice

Pride before Fall;958968 wrote: Hey Bugz, congratulations on 3 months! HUGE milestone. :clapclap:

thanks buddy