My final straw

[Peacefull]

My final straw

Hi,

I am joining you, on day 4 again! but I am not beating myself up. Been through hell and time to dusy myself up and stop self destructing. My drinking was getting worse and I experienced a hallucination night as well in the summer but that didn't stop me. It started me thinking but my soul was too broken to handle it.

Now I am here with you and really need to get this book.

[Unwasted]

My final straw

Peacefull, welcome to the thread - let us know how you do with the book. We're all broken to some degree. Me from decades of drinking - looking for a better way, and the book has given me the tools to think differently.

[Boots]

My final straw

Day 8!

Oh Doggygirl! 1239 days! I will be so excited to say that one day. I'm doing great! Every morning waking without the headaches and shakes is so wonderful. During the day , all those
horrible moments over the years come rushing back to me, and there are more than I can count! But I remember and dont beat myself up, just remember so that I don't ever want to go back there. I have not had 8 days sober in 20 years. But the Jason Vale book helped me
as no other path has, I don't feel as I'm missing out on anything now. I just hope every day gets easier and easier as it has been! Very grateful.

[Kaslo]

My final straw

Hi....I've not posted for quite a while but your story really resonated with me Maury. I'm at nine months now so I don't have the best memory of the first few months of stopping but I have found that mental picture of the really awful rock bottom moment to be a helpful reference to go back to in my mind when ever I think I might be able to moderate or that somehow drinking seems like an attractive idea. Although what happened may seem like something you should forget I do think it comes in handy as a Talisman. Best of luck. Post often. Kas

[QuitinTime]

My final straw

It will Boots. Somewhere down the line you'll forget about ethanol. It happened to me once 20 years ago when I stopped for 6 years. Good days, never even thought about the stuff. Then one fateful day I had a drink with an ex boss and very slowly started up again - took awhile to get where I was last week but Its day 6 and I havent done that in 6 years. Tomorrow will be a great day and I will just keep reminding myself that this stuff is an addictive poison and I don't want it anymore. Not Constant And Neverending Torture (Cant) but I dont want it. It does get easier - count on it.

[Struggles 106]

My final straw

Mauri and Boots

Isn't the day after the worst thing ever? Imagine
having NO more of those. Ever again.
This is what is keeping me going-that thought and
others like it.
Also IMHO-sometimes in family dynamics its
easy to play the role of "black sheep" or whatever
negative label you've internalized.
My husband left me after 22 yrs-I have no idea
how he made it that long.
Please take good care of yourself and don't beat
yourself up. You'll get enough of that.

[Peacefull]

My final straw

QuitinTime

Hi QT,

We have a similar story - I quit for 5 years, and started up 5 years ago. Modded well for approx a year and then started drinking worse than when I first stopped. I have been trying for the past 3 years and want that wonderful feeling of not even thinking of AL again, it is pure freedom.

The difference this time for me is that nothing "bad" (in my eyes, more often than not noone else would think twice) happened for me to want to quit so I am not dealing with the anxiety of an awful episode. There have been too many the past couple of years and I swore off AL after each one and the anxiety of thinking about the episode brought me back.

I have to let go, truly let go of what happened while under the influence, this poison works it's craft by playing with our minds. We are stronger than it.

I am so happy to be back
:thanks:

[mauritiusdodo]

My final straw

Thanks to a 'well wisher' I have decided this site isn't for me anymore, I can't hack being picked on as well as coping with my failures so I am leaving, thank you so much to everyone who has supported me on here I appreciate it so much. Good luck to you all and goodbye.

[looking for peace]

My final straw

Mauri if you are still there... What happened? You seemed so positive in your posts. I find the great majority of people on this forum to be be really encouraging and really helpful. I'm sorry you had something happen. Once in a while I see that people have some issues but I hope that doesn't discourage you from visiting this site. Hang in there, Peace

[YoungAtHeart]

My final straw

Wow, Mauri, I don't really even know you, but it makes me sad that you are leaving. From what I have read of your postings, you have a lot to offer. Sending best wishes, and I hope you change your mind and return.

[mauritiusdodo]

My final straw

Thank you, I have changed my mind and I will be staying around

YoungAtHeart;1194440 wrote: Wow, Mauri, I don't really even know you, but it makes me sad that you are leaving. From what I have read of your postings, you have a lot to offer. Sending best wishes, and I hope you change your mind and return.

[YoungAtHeart]

My final straw

I'm glad to hear it, Mauri!

[mauritiusdodo]

My final straw

Thank you Zen

[Peacefull]

My final straw

Glad you are staying :l

[looking for peace]

My final straw

Mauri, So happy to hear that you're staying. Good post Zen! Hugs, Peace