I start feeling myself hopeless..

[Audrey14]

Hi everybody!!!

I start loosing faith in myself that i can ever quit this beast AL..
I had 2 AF days, than drunk for 3 days a lot..Didn' t sleep last night, totally sick, i think it' s my pancreas which was in pain..
My boyfriend went to job trip, so i'm alone with dog..
Missed my English lesson today because feel very weak..still in bed, 5 p.m. here...
I'm reading sucessful stories of people and feel so miserable - really i'm so hopeless???:upset:

[patrice]

I start feeling myself hopeless..

Hi audrey,

Some excellent advice from Molly... take care.. thinking of you

[Audrey14]

I start feeling myself hopeless..

Hi Molly!!!

Thank you for support!!
Yes, i know that i have to "fill my brain" and keep it busy..And discipline which isn' t my strength..
My boyfriend is alchoholic too so sometimes i think i'm more strong when i'm alone.. He loves me very much and he' s able more to control himself. He' s everyday drinker, i'm more binge drinker. He' s more sensible with AL, i just almost always loose control.
Today i had crazy anxiety but managed not to drink. Soemtimes i just have a big fear that i'll continue to live like this i will die soon. Tomorrow will be better i know i just have to sleep. I don' t have sleeping pills anymore so only Melotonin - i hope will help.

Did a lot of readings today, watched movie, feel that probable i have hope..

Hi patrice!!!

How' re you doing??? I'm thinking about you too. Somehow we' re not successful with Skype but hope one day we' ll chat..Take care!!!:l