This is my 2nd day back and I committed to post everyday this week as the 1st week / weekend is always the hardest for me.
I got a bottle of prosecco for Xmas of a friend and I was planning to drink it for my bday or else valentines. However, after a binge on Friday night I decided to abstain completely and so I told myself I'd leave the prosecco for in the future when I could drink it like a normal drinker . Crazy AL brain huh!!
So then I said to myself i'l leave it for guests only to know that when I would open it for guests I know myself enough to know that I would say ' well I should taste it since it was a present .'
So instead I threw it out and I'm feeling more positive and stronger today about next weekend. I realized that a lot of the time I drank out of boredom and because I'm obviously more chatty and confident when socializing .
So I'm going to replace it with exercise and vitamins and growing my soul.
One other fear that I have and didn't want to voice , but if I'm gonna heal I best start telling the truth.
My husband knows I'm trying to quit though he doesn't think I have a problem and he has said to me in the past that he likes me when I drink ( that's when I only have a few) but I know he doesn't like me when I make a fool of myself or him. And I have told him I need to stay away now, I guess my fear is that I don't want to be a bore for him .
And then decide to drink so I can be the life of the party that he likes.
I think he is fine with me not drinking so long as it doesn't affect his social life....
Sorry for the long post , I'm realizing things as I'm writing them....... I guess I can love my husband but I have to love myself more and put my own health needs 1st.
Thanks for the support all.
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