I am just not going to make it

[TheSunFlower]

Edited

[Girl1973]

I am just not going to make it

I feel the same way.......I leave my counselor and go and buy vodka - sad. But i feel inside that there is something that wants to be free, like I will wake up one day and just say screw it I am DONE with AL! It is not here yet, but I can feel it brewing....because right now the consumption is not working in my life at all, I could be so much more yet I allow the devil (AL) to hold me back from my potential! Stay on here and hang in there, I have been on here for about 2 years I believe and still down a bottle a day, but I still have hope! Best to you!

[Guitarista]

I am just not going to make it

TheSunFlower;1255546 wrote: that is enough.

Hiya Sunflower.

Well, i don't believe you.

What did you always want to be?

[mario]

I am just not going to make it

TheSunFlower;1255546 wrote: that is enough.
Girl1973;1255556 wrote: I feel the same way.......I leave my counselor and go and buy vodka - sad. But i feel inside that there is something that wants to be free, like I will wake up one day and just say screw it I am DONE with AL! It is not here yet, but I can feel it brewing....because right now the consumption is not working in my life at all, I could be so much more yet I allow the devil (AL) to hold me back from my potential! Stay on here and hang in there, I have been on here for about 2 years I believe and still down a bottle a day, but I still have hope! Best to you!

Sunflower & girl1973, Please don't stop giving up, I didn't. It took me almost ten years of stopping and sliding back again before I finally hit it ,Its very hard we all know that here and its so easy to just say f### it and go back drinking,But you know thats not the answer as your life will just keep spiraling downwards and out of control,If you want this to work you have to change your whole life as nothing chamges if nothing changes,Have you tried AA , Meds, or any other ways of trying to get your way out ? keep posting as MWO is a lifeline to helping you. Read this hope it helps https://www.mywayout.org/community/f4...ase-35535.html

[Nursie]

I am just not going to make it

Maybe not today, maybe not yesterday, but you can make it. You are stronger than this disease. We have tools. We have weapons of mass destruction. We have eachother.

If you give up, then Al wins. It will get worse. WORSE then it is now. Stop before You don't even belive your own lies. Read here.

Go check out our ranting thread in the just starting out section "what I don't like about being newly sober". We kick alcohols ass all over the place.

Be kind to yourself. It's a disease, not a personality flaw or willpower malfunction. We need to utilize everything in our power to treat the disease, including but not limited to reading, making a plan, emergency plan, professional treatment if necessary, supplements and medications if desired; you can talk to your doctor; and most of all making a commitment to fight. It's not easy, nor is it easy to have cancer or multiple sclerosis.

But you best believe if I had cancer, I would say "F@&k you cancer! You're not taking me! I've got shit to do!" and I'm saying the same thing to that bitch alcohol.

Be well. Hang in there. When you are ready, we will be here.

[ThreeDogNight]

I am just not going to make it

Hi, SunFlower and Girl.
SunFlower, I thought I wouldn't make it, either, and that was just three months ago. Could not imagine my life without AL, although it had led me to places I didn't want to go. First DUI last May, and said that I'd hit bottom. Guess not, because I got a second one--right near home--in mid-November. Aggravated DUI charge, and spent six hours in the jail before they let my husband take me home. I thank God that a friend found a great rehab for me in FL. I'd been to detox before, and a short rehab last summer. But this time something clicked. I was desperate. Have court coming up, but I am finally at peace with myself. One day at a time is how I've had to do it. I go to AA almost every day, and I tell you, I have the most supportive group there. I live in a small town, and everybody saw my name in the newspaper, and I don't even care about that any more. They'll see it again when I go to court.
Girl, I used to do the same thing, only I'd often have that morning drink before seeing my therapist, and have more waiting in the car. Plenty of gum and mints on hand. I know how long it takes many of us, but there is hope. I come here several times a day, and it has helped me stay sober for 77 days now. And I do face to face AA meetings and also online meetings. I don't have to worry about finding trash cans aorund town to throw away the empty bottles, and I don't have to keep bottles hidden everywhere around the house. And I don't have those awful shakes that prevented me from being able to write a check or sign my name to anything.
If there is anything at all I can do to help you, plese let me know. If I can do it, anybody can!
Know that we are all here for you.

:lTDN

[Guitarista]

I am just not going to make it

3 dog night. I think you are amazing. Keep the faith, whatever that means to you.

Sunflower, how are you going there?

[Unwasted]

I am just not going to make it

Sunflower, are you ok? You posted here so you must want to "talk"??? To both you and Girl, I could never have imagined being sober a year and a half ago........I've done a 180 and now I'm learning to be at peace with it.

Sun, please let us know how you're doing.

[Shining Star]

I am just not going to make it

Go here immediately to Toolbox.

Helped save me many times before.

Shining Star