help

[sugarbeat]

Hi All

Its my first post, I'm 2 days sober, had a bad relapse last weekend after 7 months sobriety. Hid myself away in a hotel with everyone out looking for me, to be honest I had wished I didn't wake up



Friends have decided to distance themselves for there own sake to protect themselves from me after the weekend

I have been in rehab 3 times in the last 2 1/2 years

I was doing so well but have lost it all again

I've no friends, no job and kinda o hope again and feel like the worst alco out there

I live at home for the moment and wondering is there anyway I can do this without aa, it never helped me I just forced myself to go

I'm just looking for some hope for someone who feels like a crazy stupid girl, will I ever get my life,trust and independance back again

Thanks forreading this

[caper564]

help

Hi sugar beat,
AA did nothing for me either, but it does help some. I think although you are 2 days sober you still are under the influence of the AL.. the negativity will subside as soon as you haev a few days under your belt. you must remember this from your sobriety. 7 months was great, don't beat yourself up too badly. we all slip, its the nature of the beast. at least you were smart enough to hide yourself away in a hotel and not drink and drive or hurt anyone. I wish in my drunken stupidness i would have hid away from the world insteead of embarrasing myself and my family.

go to your Dr. and ask about medication to help you through this if you need to or a walk in clinic if you would rather be anonymous. hang in there, we are here to help

caper

[Doggygirl]

help

Hi sugarbeat. There are lots of people who DO get sober without AA. Lots of them here at MWO. It's not the only support system. I hope you will keep looking at things you haven't tried yet. Meds? SMART Recovery? Women for Sobriety? Have you downloaded and read the My Way Out book?

Don't give up!!! I heard a guy speak last week who had been medically detoxed 103 times before he finally got sober in his 50's. He's been sober 10 years now. Stories like that tell me that sobriety is ALWAYS POSSIBLE.

:l

DG

[sugarbeat]

help

Thanks for the support

Its day 3, I'm having up and down moments

God this is painful especially when you get so far and when you do it again, everything is gone so quick, d't really have much to look forward to and afraid to face anyone

In the middle of all this I'm trying to get a job, all those feelings of not good enough has returned

Can anyone recommend something I could listen to or read on the inernet to help me out
Any one ever try eft? is it effective

[sugarbeat]

help

Just had a read about baclofen and wiki says it is no longer reccomended for alcohol dependency, where can I read more about it

[sugarbeat]

help

ok suppose I'm just using this as a way of tracking myself, might be go to look back on someday

Its day 4, I'm getting moments of peace but my head is still spinning with the could of would of should of

My mother confronted me wants me to go back to rehab, it was fairly full on. I didn't reply only yo say I wasn't going again, there is nothing more they can teach me only for me to ut it into practice. Dn't get me wrong I need help to from somewhere, I need to learn how to stop my head spinning and thinking but where to go I DONT KNOW

I just tried not to be confrontational with my mother, I know its all my fault and I Know they are hurting, its awful hard

Can any reccommend something non perscriptive to calm my anxiety a bit, ie tea?

How long will it take for the cloud to pass a bit?

[crazyforwine]

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Sugarbeat,

Someone I met through MWO a few years back-a woman in Europe-got really into EFT and swears by it. She cannot say enough good things and in fact has been trying to start an EFT service of some sort. I have no experience with it, but you might give it a try. I think anything that enhances self awareness can be good.

CW

[sugarbeat]

help

Day 5
Cloud is passing a bit, god alcohol really brings you irrationally down, I'm a bit more up on my feet, bit more positive, but not folling myself and I suppose the longer I'm away from it the better it gets

Had a good chat with my mother, my parents are amazing but heartbroken for me, I've lost peoples trust again but i suppose i'll just have to burst through that and try not let it get me down, tipping away at the eft and I really want to commit to it.

I have a problem of thinking too much and got into the negetive thinking habit over 4 years to it will take abit of work to crack that, maybe yoga and a good counselor

I won't post in this section again and find somewhere more appropriate to rattle on and get help but thanks for all the replies.

PS. Here's something to pepp you up

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PiyOF6DW-Qo[/video]]Inspirational Video | Dare To Be Great - YouTube

[nancy]

help

things to try

Hi Sugar,
Sorry you are feeling so bad, esp. with the shame. I often think that society is very cruel about addiction.
By EFT do you mean emotional freedom techique? I found that to be surprisingly effective, in combination with hypnotherapy, but it's expensive.
Negative thinking definitely can be addressed in counseling with cognitive behavioral psychology and in hypnotherapy with EFT.
In terms of free things on the internet, you should look in the holistic section of this site. There was one thread with lots of links to addiction podcasts. The section is not that active so it shouldn't be too hard to find.
If you have a bad problem and have not had success I think you should consider medication. Naltrexone seems to have some benefits and lots of people here are experimenting with baclofen. I would advise doing it with a doctor though.
Take care of yourself!
Oh and if you don't like AA look up a group called Women for sobriety. I often think AA is not the right program for women. Women who abuse substances need to build their self-esteem.

[woywoyboy]

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I'll second Baclofen. It works and I've tried just about everything.
All the positive thinking in the world is not going to solve a biological problem such as alcoholism alone. Nor are 12 step style programs that were created over 70 years ago. Plenty to read about it in the meds forum. Every time I read the general areas of the forums and see time and again the stories of folks falling off the wagon I think "if only they knew about Bac"
Sugarbeat, do you know what the trigger was? Cravings or curiosity or something else? Whatever, you can't beat yourself up about it. You you need to accept it happened, accept you feel bad about it and tray and learn from it. You can't go back to the past and change things.