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    #16
    Tapering off alcohol?

    I just now read this thread Sisyphus! So glad you are taking the bull by the horns. Stay close - these people have been a lifesaver for me. It has been hard getting back on the wagon after 11 months sober (don't even know why the pull of AL is so damn strong for me!) and it is still a stuggle, but well worth it. I wish you strength and happiness. You can do this. One day at a time friend. Just one day at a time!

    Love Waggy
    February 27th, 2013. A New , Successful Start. :h

    When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top!!

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      #17
      Tapering off alcohol?

      Just finished off beer #6 and I'm going to bed. The craving for a #7, 8, 9 is fairly strong tonight but I know tomorrow will be better.... and no, I'm not going to the Kwiki-Mart. Lol

      I worked through a couple of chapters of my current workbook (Sex, Drugs, Gambling & Chocolate) and it gave me some insight into how to manage the coming conversation with my son. Anyone else used this book? I am finding it a great help, although if I think too much about the addiction the cravings increase.

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        #18
        Tapering off alcohol?

        Thank you Waggy! Best wishes to you too )

        I just want to note that I consumed my 6 beers tonight in the same time frame that I *normally* consume 10. So, it's only been a few days but it's progress. The fear of getting to 0 is strong tonight. That damn bull!!!

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          #19
          Tapering off alcohol?

          Still going strong sisyphus well done. I know you can do this and as you say your feeling better. Ive never heard of the book and I agree, I have to know when to stop reading or thinking or talking about addiction and alcohol because I can suddenly find myself wanting one when I didnt before. Its all about getting a balance which we can find.

          sending good thoughts xxx

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            #20
            Tapering off alcohol?

            So, 6 light beer tonight over 6 hours and I'm absolutely knockered. How was I pounding back 10-12 in the same time last week? Is the fog-head a slow withdrawal? I also did not take any Xanax today... woke up foggy but no shakes whatsoever.

            By my calculations, 6 Coors Light (4.1%) = just over 5 San Miguel Light (5%, advertised as "all the alcohol, less calories" lol). So small progress.

            I'm a bit worried about tomorrow as I have to attend a work-related dinner and the drinks will be flowing freely. I did find a nice little drink tracker for the iPhone, and have managed to have no more than one drink in 50 minutes for the last several days. Plus, I'm driving myself tomorrow on an unfamiliar route so I know I'll stay conscious of that little detail. But typically in the past, I've behaved relatively well when socializing, then come home and drank myself silly. Something about the social stimulation gets me high, then I drink to settle down. I'm still trying to understand this...

            Thanks Bebe for thinking about me

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              #21
              Tapering off alcohol?

              Hi Sis,

              I take the Topa cause it reduces my anxiety, anxiousness to just about zero. I do have some depression, but alcohol is a depressant which only made it worse. Really I believe the physical part of my drinking has been driven by anxiety for many years. Tried many anti-depressants which actually increased my drinking. There is plenty of evidence about this & has been 4 yrs.

              Topamax works on the mighty two neurotransmitters Gaba & L-Gluatamine. Researchers found out years ago that many people who abuse alcohol or who r alcoholics r lacking these. In fact the founder of this forum used this drug off label. Since then there has been several published documents in well respected medical journals.

              This drug is also used for PTSD, GAD, Bi-Polar. I was Diagnosed with the 1st two, but not by a PDr, by a Counselor. I had to get a PDr. to RX the Topa. As My GP won't RX many of them won't. Many people lie and say they suffer from migraines or get it on-line from overseas.

              I took the Topa in 07-08 stayed sober for almost 8 months. I had no cravings as the drug calms my excited brain. I lack Gaba which is like the brains natural valium. Same PDr RXd back then. He did say to me I might b bi-polar2. But, he never made an official diagnosis. I think I have a few of the symptoms, but also I see some sub type ADD in myself too. I also think that Dr's conclude this when people say anti-depressants don't work or make them worse.

              Dizzybee on the Topamax board describes it better then me. There r also other cessation meds that help people with cravings, along with wholistic approaches.

              I tried everything else & didn't want to go the med route to get off the booze. I've had up to 3 month stints AF a few times, but PAWS which is Post Acute WithDrawals sends me right back to the bottle. So, I had to do something different. The Topamax worked b4, for the physical part of my addiction, so I'm back taking it again after a regrettable 4.5 yr lapse. Can't cry over the past, just have 2 move fwd now.

              I'm having some different side effects this time. Not so bothersome that I will stop taking Topa. I'm at the stage in my alcoholism that if I don't stop I will die at a relatively young age. I have two daughters in their twenties, a hubby & a mom who needs me. Plus I'd like to actually enjoy living.

              I haven't read the book! Sounds like it could help many of us, as cross addiction is prevalent for some of us. I've gotten myself into trouble in the past with gambling, use 2 love sex, & still love chocolate, oh & there were my MJ days. Experimented with other drugs in my teens, but luckily my brain didn't enjoy them.

              There r so many threads that I'm wanting to join in & post on. My brain is feeling a bit less fuzzy, just no time. I do know that it helps so much to connect with others who r going thru similar experiences.

              Whats so great about this site compared to others I've visited ~ lurked at for long periods, is the diversity. I see myself, my journey, where I was, where I am & where I want to be. I also see a great deal of support & for the most part with out too much judgement. Tho I do think it's appropriate at times to support people by applying a little tough love. Along with so many different ways people have kicked this beast out of their lives. Let alone all the knowledge shared here from all over the world.

              I'm still in the process of figuring out where I fit in best, but because my goal is AF that gives me a gauge to go by.

              For myself, I need 2 find that thread about Emotional Sobriety, as it's a huge part of successful long term sobriety. I want & need 2 explore it deeper. As soon as I have time I will post there & Topamax board.

              I believe in spiritual healing. I do have an HP, whom I call God ~ Jesus. There is a different board named what we believe. If a person desires to discuss their different beliefs, or their values. I think I've seen threads for atheists & agnostics. No discrimination or persecution for different beliefs here. YEAH!

              These are my 3 areas that I need to focus & work on. Physical, Emotional, Spiritual. All those encompass my mind as well. May I become successful in my goals in living a AF life. The life I've always deserved to live!.... The life I'm going to have!...

              Anyway, I'm very tired. I need to make short grocery list, shower & head to the hospital. My Mom is stabilizing. I'm thankful.

              Your doing well! Stick to your plan! Stay connected to people here! Keep Reading! You can do this!....

              Namaste,

              Wildflowers

              PS. Just read ur last post. For myself those social situations trigger excitement as well. Suggestion no hard liquor in house & maybe 2-3 beers awaiting u when u get home. Prevention Measures! Just know ur going to have a harder withdrawal by tirating the alcohol back up into ur system. Been there. Also eat a heavy meal, some bread or carbs, if u can or want. Drink lots of water with lemon in between drinks. Stick with just beer at the social function. This will make ur LIVER HAPPY!... Will make u feel better tom!.... There is ur son 2 think about!... Write a pros & cons list. Please don't mix xanax with booze, it's a Deadly Deadly Cocktail. Now with out sounding sarcastic please do have fun, just not too much fun or it won't be any damn fun at all!!! Also the lemon in water helps detox ur body. Many of us take Milk Thistle it helps our livers survive the alcohol abuse. I take milk thistle with dandelion. I also take a good multi, some other supplements. But, besides the ones I've mentioned the one that's really important to is B-100 time released. Most people who abuse alcohol r thiamine deficient. Gotta run the clock is ticking. Wished I could stay on this site for another hr or two as it helps me so much. I'm missing my Topa peeps. I need to pop over there next time I'm here. Take Care Sis:l

              Comment


                #22
                Tapering off alcohol?

                Hi sisyphus, glad your still on track and doing really well. Why didnt you take a xanax, not that Im saying you should, you might have mentioned it before but if you have been taking xanax for a while is now the right time to stop when you are cutting down on the booze, obviously its up to you but I believe in changing things one by one, what you are doing now with the booze is great and is giving your brain plenty of time to change with it, I just dont want you to risk it by stopping xanax at the same time, it might be too much for your brain..just my opinion, not medical fact.

                Try and enjoy the dinner, can you have a beer there and then you will still be on track and have a few left to have when you get home. you could try having some l glut before you go as well

                have a good day xxx

                ps dont forget you dont have to decrease every single day, just dont go up, if you are finding a day stressful you can always stay at the same level as the day before then start going down again tomorrow so you can keep that in mind tonight, you will not have failed if you have the same as yesterday

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                  #23
                  Tapering off alcohol?

                  Thank you WF and SB. I'l come back and write more tomorrow but I wanted to post an update. SB you were right about the xanax. I have normally taken 1/2 or occasionally 1 dose of 1.25 mg in the morning. Yesterday I didn't take it because I didn't feel shaky or anxious. Then this morning I woke up to a racing heart. Took my 1/2 xanax and that didn't help so I ended up taking a Neobloc, which pretty much ruined my day because it knocks my BP down, I was feeling faint and sick all day. I made my excuses and stayed home tonight.

                  So it's still early days. Since last Monday I've reduced my beer intake by about 1/3 or more and I'm still alive. I've just cracked #6 tonight and I did put one extra in the fridge just in case, but I think it will stay there until tomorrow. If it does, that in itself will be a major step. I did eat a heavy meal tonight too, so I feel fairly calm and hope for a decent night's sleep. The reinforcement that it doesn't have to be all in one shot helps a lot.

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                    #24
                    Tapering off alcohol?

                    WF, that's a whole lot of interesting info that I'm going to have to do more research on with regard to my own situation. I had the same experience with Ads increasing my drinking... basically, I just didn't give a shit about the problems any more. I took Ads for years but have not touched them for the last 10 and refuse to go back, even though I also experienced a lot of benefit from them.

                    This really does seem to be a great, supportive place to work on healing

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                      #25
                      Tapering off alcohol?

                      I dont know what Neoblock is, is it a beta blocker? I have taken them for anxiety and panic attacks in the past but havent noticed any effects like you had.

                      You are doing really well, give yourself a big pat on the back

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                        #26
                        Tapering off alcohol?

                        Yes, Neobloc is a beta blocker. It does manage the racing heart but every time I take it, it knocks the wind out my sails. Up until recently my blood pressure has tended to be on the low side, so maybe that's it.

                        Thanks for the ongoing support! I treated myself to a new outfit today. I really can't wait until this withdrawal process is behind me... I feel so much better already

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                          #27
                          Tapering off alcohol?

                          Wildflowers, here is the link to the book on Amazon:

                          http://www.amazon.com/Sex-Drugs-Gamb...4476017&sr=8-1

                          It takes the approach that all addictions come from the same source -- a basic need that you are not fulfilling otherwise. I've found it really helpful in identifying why I drink and better ways to meet those needs. It's a workbook, and I've made headway by actually doing the exercises instead of just skimming through (as I normally do). It also includes "projects" or commitments you can make to yourself to take steps toward normalcy.

                          Hope you can check it out, and meanwhile I'm going to discuss Topamax with a doctor and see if it would help me.

                          Comment


                            #28
                            Tapering off alcohol?

                            Ive been looking at the book on amazon, it looks good, I might get it myself

                            Comment


                              #29
                              Tapering off alcohol?

                              Spacebebe, I think it is well worth your while (and anyones) to get this book. Believe me, I've read every book published on this problem that I can find, and this one seems so... practical. While far from out of the woods, I think I'm finally on a positive track. Down to 1/2 of what I was drinking a week ago, focusing on eating better and I got to the gym today after a year of not

                              I'm still taking it slow because I don't want a recurrence of Saturday. But today I made another step. I broached the subject with my supervisor (who also happens to be my best friend here, even though I've never shared this with her) to sort of lay the groundwork for when I need to and can take health leave. She has told me before that she has this "fatty liver" but she hardly drinks at all. I told her my diagnosis and that it *is* because of my heavy drinking. So that's the first step in that direction.

                              My main concern is still my son. Things are coming together for May but dealing with all of this in a foreign country is so freaking complicated. Meanwhile, I'm trying to juggle the insane work demands that I have at this time of year. Please send strength and good vibes... I have to get through this.

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                                #30
                                Tapering off alcohol?

                                Sorry u weren't feeling well. Understand about the BP. I also have Thyroid disease & beta blockers can knock ur BP down. Alcohol knocks it back up, then withdrawals back up. Oh in some small way I'm glad u didn't go to the social function. Not glad that ur not feeling well! I'm avoiding them myself. I have 2 protect my sobriety!

                                I also haven't taken ADS in 10 years & never will go back. Tho I took St Johns Wort a few different times. Couldn't take the recommended dosage 3x a day as I'd have nightmares. It has some other medicinal uses that I liked, but found that I didn't need them after all & was wasting $.

                                I think the one thing that I liked about ADS is that I didn't have 2 feel anything which at the x was helpful. I have thought of taking them again once in awhile. As there have been times that I just didn't want to give a shit about anything, but I always had alcohol to do that. Well, until it quit working & has made me quite ill in many ways.

                                In truth my drinking didn't make me give a shit either! I believe my depression was situational 4 the most part. It's this anxiety, anxiousness, nervousness that has been my brains main problem. Which in turn does cause some depression. ADS made my depression worse which made me want 2 drink more. So I won't take them. It's all about changing the way I feel, whether it stems from physical, emotional or spiritual problems.

                                I do very much believe that many people need ADS & highly recommend professional help!

                                I'm glad u have found a book that is helping u & that ur doing the work! I too believe that a part of addiction stems from unmet emotional needs. I have already committed myself to order a book called Loving What Is, by Byron Katie. I think the concepts run along the same lines. I will ck out the link & add that 2 my reading list. I do like the fact that it has exercises in it.

                                As 4 the Topamax, I do hope ur Dr is open minded. My GP is older & doesn't believe in Rxing off label. I even went 2 him a few yrs back with knowledge & printed documentation & still he wouldn't Rx it 4 me. Perhaps when u have x u can familiarize urself with it, so if u choose to go this route, u will have info 2 share with ur Dr. The 1st two wks on Topamax & no Alcohol my BP returned to normal. Now I don't have to take the beta blocker.

                                I do still occasionally feel my heart racing, but after cutting ciggs down to 1/2 pk up to almost a pk the last few days I think this is whats causing it. I just have 2 find a way 2 quit!

                                Hope ur Dr. has ckd ur Thyroid, ordered a comprehensive CBC Panel, & comprehensive metabolic panel. Hopefully, ur Dr will check ur Homocysteine levels. Thymine & B vitamin levels.

                                Glad ur feeling better! U will continue 2 feel better & better as u remove alcohol from ur body. Good 4 u on treating urself to a new outfit. Even better that u have a supportive supervisor & that u made it 2 the gym!....

                                I know ur worried about ur son & can't imagine how difficult this must be arranging all of this away from home. Tho I get the feeling ur a strong woman.

                                Sorry about the long post! I will try 4 everyone's sake 2 make them shorter.

                                If u do write long posts or get up & take a break, this site is on a timer & will log u out. Need 2 copy & paste or u will lose ur posts.

                                Sending u strength & good vibes! Stick 2 ur plan, stay connected, keep doing what ur doing as, ur already getting some good results!

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