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    Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

    Congratulations Janice, that is great news and I am delighted for you.
    I love Andrea B's music, I will be excited to hear how it is!
    Happy Friday everyone else....
    “The only courage you will ever need is the courage to live the life you want"

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      Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

      Congrats Janice on Six Months!!!

      CONGRATS JANICE ON SIX MONTHS...OH WOW YiPPPPEEEE YOU DID IT!!! WAHOOOOOOO!!! :disco:

      Hope everyone is having a great start to their weekend. Thank god, the weather FINALLY cooled down and PERFECT for running. I am sooooooo happy can't wait to get out into that cold and start getting some miles in inkele: (couldn't find a runner icon). Sausage, my next running is the Carlsbad Half Marathon, which will be in January. I am so excited because I can now enter for the Triple Crown. I will explain in my next post what the Triple Crown is.....

      Anywho, congrats again Janice on six months and you should definitely treat yourself to something sweet. Congrats to you all, no matter what day your at or just still struggling, remember "try, try, again".

      Hugs,
      Janet
      AF Day 188
      AF Since May 2nd 2012

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        Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

        Hey Janet, it really has cooled hasn't it - from 90 to 50"s in three days! Pulled out the flannel sheets and put on bed. The chimney is clean and passed inspection, so a fire is called for tonight. Hopefully the heating gets fixed on Monday it is a little chilly here for no heat, but really can't complain when I think of those on east coast without power still....
        Hope all are having a good Saturday (even thou for most it is well on the way out now:H - so maybe I should say that hopefully everyone HAD a good Saturday)
        “The only courage you will ever need is the courage to live the life you want"

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          Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

          Hi everyone, just checking in. Thanks again for all the Congratulations.

          Very tired & a little upset as mam was very poorly this weekend. Its been a hard few weeks but it was especially hard leaving her to come back home this time. Aiming to get back at the end of the month unless things get worse. I look at her & wonder wld she still have dementia had she never drank, maybe - we will never know. One things for sure the recurring uti infections & the removal of one of her kidneys last year has got to be down to years of drinking. I certainly dont want my daughter to have to see me like that in 35yrs time - I have all the motivation I need to stay on this AF path. Night night. xx
          AF since 9 May 2012
          Quit trying to control something that is uncontrollable (Bear February 08)

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            Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

            Hi Everyone,

            Hope everyone had a great weekend. I had a busy weekend but managed to go out and do a couple runs. Janice, hope sorry to read your struggles with your Mom's health, it must be a difficult thing to experience. Yes SL, the weather has been fabulous and perfect for running : ) Wow, I sure do miss having a fireplace, lucky you. Sounds like you are doing much better and thanks for posting. What day are you at? Hey, Ishybit....has the weather is SD cooled down?

            Glad to hear that everyone is doing good. Have a great week and congrats on your AF Days. Thank you too, for staying on this thread, it's such a pleasure reading your progress. I am so proud of all you guys, WTG : )

            Hugs,
            Janet
            AF Day 190
            AF Since May 2nd 2012

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              Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

              Good morning all - so sorry about your mother Janice - my parents are aging and i dread the day that I am in your shoes, but know it will happen. Stay strong and brave and make sure you take sometime for yourself.
              Janet - I have 2 weeks under my belt now and starting week three - I do look forward to counting months like the rest of you here!
              Sausage - are you over the big day yet? and on to new records? If not, you must be awfully close.
              Hope all is well Ishy??
              Have a good Monday all..
              “The only courage you will ever need is the courage to live the life you want"

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                Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

                Hi Everyone,
                Janice, it's so hard to deal with aging parents. Between me and my husband, we have one surviving parent. We Went through most of it a little earlier than our friends our age. I now see a lot of our generation caring for aging parents. All the decisions that need to be made, financial questions, emotional upheavals etc... I really feel for you! I often find myself thinking about aging. If I watch an elderly person cross the street or an older couple going out to dinner, I think "I hope I get to that age in a without too many complications." I sometimes regret not being more patient with my mother before she past and yet I feel like it's been part of my life's journey to figure out our relationship. Hmmm.
                I hope your relations with your Mum end is a peaceful place. Hang on Lady.

                PlanetJanet, it has cooled off here in San Diego but I can still get a sunburn! It's really beautiful out today but freezing in the house!
                Hi SL, you are doing great. Keep on cruzin through each day. Last night was the first anniversary my husband and I celebrated without AL in 13 years! It's another milestone that puts a smile on my face. I will admit, it wasn't the most eventful night but I enjoy being low key these days.
                Hi Sausage, what's new?
                Have a great day!
                Ishy

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                  Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

                  Hello Everyone,

                  A quick post before heading to bed.....

                  Congrats SL, that's so awesome!

                  Janice, a big hug to you sweetie, it's tough seeing a parent like that. I had an experience with my father when he had prostate cancer and it was the most "scary" realization that this sick person is my parent. You are in my prayers : )

                  Ishybit, had some "Santa Ana's" come through here last of week and wow funny to be lying out in the sun in November....LOL.

                  Hi Sausage, hope you are keeping warm. How is the weather where you are at? How nice it is to experience snow on Christmas Day?

                  Anywho, I have been swamped with work and starting training for my half marathon. I am so excited the holidays are here. I LOVE CHRISTMAS!! It's my favorite holiday, the lights, music and the FOOD!! Yikes! I am going to have to watch myself in making sure to not eat too much and to stir away from thinking that it's okay because I am quit drinking.

                  Have a great Friday and I will check back on Saturday. It's so nice read that you all are doing well, had a smile from ear to ear when I read your post. Congrats : )

                  Hugs,
                  Janet
                  AF Day 194
                  AF Since May 2nd 2012

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                    Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

                    Hi everyone, hope you are all well & enjoying your AF life! Janet & Ishy thanks for the kind thoughts...going up to see her again Mon/Tuesday. SL you are doing great, so pleased for you!!! Sausage hope you are okay, please let us know how you are doing??

                    My hubby was late in from work last night (abt 8.30pm) but still managed a full bottle of red between sitting down & going to bed. (He hadnt drank since Sunday but had had a stressful day at work so felt the need) By the time I was ready to go up to bed 11.30pm he was sound asleep which is not that unusual. I tried shaking him but he was so out of it, I threw a blanket over him and went to bed. Came down twice as I couldnt settle and there was just no moving him - well he sort of came round but was making no sense whatsoever so in the end I left him to it & he finally came up to bed at 4am. This morning was interesting though...seeing him struggle, trying to find his best suit, his best tie, recharge his phone which he'd forgot to do last night, find this file, that file etc for a really important meeting at work. He jumped in the car (I drop him off at station) was stressed as anything then realised his tie was dirty so ran in the house to change it, got back in the car and half way to the station realised this tie was "clicked". As we got to the station he kept saying "can you notice, can you notice??". "Yes, stop at Tie Rack & buy yourself a new one before your meeting" I replied. Wonder how his meeting will go? The joys of drinking....NOT!

                    Have a grt dayxx
                    AF since 9 May 2012
                    Quit trying to control something that is uncontrollable (Bear February 08)

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                      Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

                      Morning Janice , Janet, Ishy, Scottish Lass and everyone else out there!

                      Been really hectic this last week or so - worked some extra hours at work to cover for a colleague and at the weekend it was my son's 7th birthday party.

                      The weather is damp and miserable here in Scotland, no sign of snow.

                      I've decided that I'm going to start wrapping all my Christmas presents and writing all my cards this weekend with the aim to be organised by December 1st!! I've bought most people's presents apart from immediate family. I hate being stressed close to Christmas. Speaking of Christmas I'm actually getting a little anxious about this being AF and wondering how I'll manage? Does anyone else have these anxieties?

                      Loved the story about your husband this am after the bottle of red. When he works his way through a bottle of red all evening, what do you do / drink? I am glad you are not remotely tempted after your latest visit back home.

                      Hope the half marathon training is going well Janet. I am finding it harder to get out and run in this nasty damp weather. Ishy - glad your AF wedding anniversary went well. Scottish Lass keep going the days willl add up and you will soon have that month!!

                      Back later - have a good day / weekend all xx

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                        Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

                        good to hear from you Sausage! While he's drinking his wine on a night, I usually have a glass of sparkling water nearby or a can of coke, plus laptop closeby & plenty to keep me occupied lol!! Talking of Christmas, I know what you mean. Its the Baileys I'm gonna miss. I usually start that at the beg of December & go through a couple of bottles (at least!) before Christmas, wrapping pressies with Christmas music in the background...mmm will have to think of an alternative!!! Certainly going to save some money this year arent we? We can do it though.

                        I found going to the concert on Wed night quite hard. It was at the O2 and walking around beforehand people were meeting up for drinks, supper, etc and it all looked so inviting. I headed for the newsagents & bought a bottle of sparkling water....thoughts soon passed.

                        Back to my hoovering...
                        AF since 9 May 2012
                        Quit trying to control something that is uncontrollable (Bear February 08)

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                          Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

                          Happy Saturday Everyone,

                          Janice, LOL that story had me "rolling on the floor laughing" too funny. Sorry to hear your husband had to endure all that stress and hope his meeting went well, but it was funny how you wrote it.

                          Hi Sausage, wow your son is turning 7...how cute. What is birthday wish gift? Good for you on getting organized this Christmas, matter of fact, think that's what I will plan to do too.

                          SL & Ishybit, what are you plans during the holidays? How are you doing?

                          The holiday season is REALLY depressing for me because I only have one friend, no joke and my family well the only relationship I have with them is that we share the same last name. Three years ago, I went back home for holidays after suffering a really bad break up and thought it would be nice to go up north for comfort...LOL wow was that a big mistake. Not one person in the family even gave me a hug or even bothered to comfort me and when I mentioned it, they just changed the subject.....OUCH! The hardest part of being adopted is that unfortunately my sister and I were adopted for the wrong reasons. Just alittle history, my sister is from Seoul, Korea and I am from Calcutta, India, now alot people would say we were lucky to be adopted into a family and yes well kind of we were. For me, I was abandoned by my real mother, found in the streets Calcutta, founded by one of nuns from Mother Teresa's Missionaries of Charity (which I met her when I was younger) and sad to say brought to a mother and father, who really never wanted me in the first place. The only time my mother showed love was when she was drunk, when she was sober, oh gosh she was a fricken mean "get out my way" person. My mother had three sons of her own and lets just say that they are her gems, til this day, she still treats my sister and I COMPLETELY different then her three boys.So, you can imagine if they came home for the holidays after enduring a heart wrenching break up, well she was just be so UPSET and maybe even would have cried....for me, I GOT nothing.

                          You know what the "god awful part" about my family or should I say these people......Three years ago, I HAD finally expressed my anger towards my older brother for molesting me and yes it wasn't very pleasant on how I approached it...well actually come to think of it, I had expressed it in an email and don't recall swearing at him. This issue was never resolved, well maybe for him it was, he basically said to me many years back that "it was his way of trying to show me love". There was no "heart felt" apology, in my opinion it was just a load of bull to avoid taking any responsibility of it. In fact, he said the he hoped that I didn't have a crush on him because of it...LOL. Now here's the "crazy making part" til this day my whole family knows, they know that I confronted him and they seem take his side and tell me that "I just need to get over it"... DOUBLE OUCH! I guess this explains why I drank, to self medicate that pain that I endured from my family and still do to this day : (

                          Anywho, sorry to be a bummer......moving forward my life is good right now and things like this are just "obstacles" that I will face and I am now better at learning to deal with them in a positive way and to learn to "set boundaries" for myself (thank god for "self help" books). I know that in time, I will be surrounded by a good circle of friends and some will be like family to me. I have been doing alot of visualizing of my new life will be when I move to San Francisco, the great job I will have, the new friends I will have and MAYBE new love....MAYBE....for now I just LOVE being single.

                          It's raining and cloudy here, wow what a nice change. I will definitely plan on doing a 9 mile run this afternoon...rain or shine, I am DOING IT!!! For me, the cold days are the best to run, I can get more miles in : ) HOLY MOLEY did I write alot...sorry guys....

                          Have a great Saturday everyone and I will check in tomorrow.

                          Hugs,
                          Janet
                          AF Day 196
                          AF Since May 2nd 2012

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                            Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

                            Holy crap PJ!
                            What a mother load you have had to deal with! I can't imagine the range of emotions you have had to process and the disappointment In your "family." Assholes. I'm glad that you feel safe and supported on our little thread. You sound so strong and you're creating the life you want and deserve. Good for you!
                            Keep up the good work and surround yourself with positive people that deserve your friendship and love!
                            Rock on lady.
                            Ishy

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                              Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

                              Wow Janet - I am in awe, what an incredible, stong, wonderful woman you are - to have come thru all of that and have such dignity and grace says a lot about the person that you are, IN SPITE of the family who were given a wonderful gift and squandered it. I am honored to know you in the way that I do.
                              I too am short on friends due to the life led when I was married - I would like to be able to make new friends especially in the way that I intend to live now I am AF, so I understand your thoughts of being lonely.
                              Hi Ishy, Sausage and Janice - I had a tough night last night, got a telling off from Kuya and she told me to have a good cry which I proceeded to do and the tension fell away, and I got thru the night - so I will be looking at three weeks tomorrow.
                              Sausage, hope you survive the 7th birthday - fun, but hard times for mums!
                              Janice - so am there about present wrapping - I rarely drink sherry, but it got me thru the gift wrapping each year, I always wondered why my gifts under the tree weren't as neat as others:H:H
                              Ishy, well done on your 13th anni and getting thru it without the traditional celebrating!
                              Janet - be good to yourself, you DO deserve a good life :l:l
                              “The only courage you will ever need is the courage to live the life you want"

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                                Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

                                Checking in quickly to say Hi and glad I did. Janet I want to give you a huge hug...what a story. SL & Ishy are right-you deserve to be happy & to have a good life. How strong you are to get yourself through such bad times but you have & you are here 6 months AF embarking on a new exciting life - I've only known you since May but you are such a kind, generous, encouraging, positive lady - Janet we might only be in 'cyberspace' but I am proud to be your friend.

                                Hi to Ishy, Sausage & SL (Yeah!!!! you are doing amazing - 3weeks!!!!)

                                Wont be on tomorrow - up on the train to see mam...back Tuesday night.

                                xx
                                AF since 9 May 2012
                                Quit trying to control something that is uncontrollable (Bear February 08)

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