Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

[planetjanet]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

Hi Everyone,

Once again, got too late and now I have to get myself to bed because I have to get up EARLY to go into the office. I too, agree with TDN, part of the reason is because I started this thread and this will always be my "base", however I also will venture out onto other threads as well, that's if I have time. Since I quit drinking, it's just been so key for me to start cleaning out the "skeletons" out of the closet. All those things that I never took care of because I was drinking and now I can finally be clear headed and focused I am also consumed at work because I just found out that they put in a job posting but my boss tells it's for a bookkeeper, not my job (administrative assistant) however it sounds very fishy. So, I am RIDDLED with panic that they are going to fire me and once again I am out of a job again. This job here, job there, is too exhausting. I will be 44 years old and gosh darn it, it's important that I excel in my education and work. To add more to salt the wound, the girl that I have been having problems with, has become even worse with me, wow talk about uncomfortable. The good news is that I have been running home (about 6 miles) which has allows me to get my frustration out and I am starting to feel the weight come off....it's about time..LOL!!

Anywho, grrrrrrgh it's almost midnight and I need to get to bed. You are guys are in my thoughts and I hope that if you do leave this thread that you will once in awhile drop in to say hello.

Remember back when this thread first started, who would have thought almost 9 months later...we are here...LOL

Lots of hugs,
Janet
AF Day 282

[ThreeDogNight]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

I agree with you, Janet. I am a relative "newbie" on this thread, but like reading about what everyone is up to, even if it's juat a once-a-week update or check in. And seeing new people coming aboard for a 30 day challenge and then sticking with it, is very uplifting.

Janet, I understand about the job thing. And an office setting, from my brief experience with that, can be toxic, especially--this isn't meant to be sexist-with a bunch of women! I hope you'll be able to find something different soon. Have you ever tried indeed.com? You can specify region and type of job and get the daily listings. I still get them.

Cold again this a.m. and maybe some snow tomorrow. The ground is virtually bare--not that I am complaining:H

TDN

[Janice]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

Hi everyone, a quick checkin. Been over to see my mother in law today with hubby as its 7yrs since we lost my father in law. Had a lovely walk on the south downs where he used to walk each day and put some flowers down.

Congratulations Balboa on your 30days...feels good doesnt it?!? Now for the next 30!

TDN what is your "boring project"??? Well done with your exercise! I finally managed a swim on Friday...first swim since well before Christmas, well might even be November! The thought of going was the hardest part...when I finally got myself there I really enjoyed it and I had much more energy the rest of the day.

I definitely need to exercise to stay positive otherwise I get very down, start dwelling on "stuff" that I cant control, my self esteem goes, I feel lonely, etc etc etc and then I start to think about the "a" word. Think I had one of those days the other day and decided I need to take action so that I stay in control. So..another swim is planned in the morning with hubby. (He's had a bottle of red tonight so lets see if he makes it!!)

Janet feel for you with the job...hope you dont get fired and that this girl backs off. Really hard when all you must feel like doing is telling her what you think!!! Good thinking running all that stress of before you get home!

I too feel like this thread is my "base". Daft as it may seem but I seem to have lost all confidence even with posting on other threads especially compared to when I first joined MWO in 2007. But this is where I feel comfortable and like you say TDN there's no drama. Anyway, I'd like to stay put and celebrate my 1 year of sobriety on here with you guys...its where it all began afterall.

See you tomorrow folks xx

[Janice]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

Morning everyone..hope everyone is having a good weekend. I've been for another swim this morning so thats Friday and today and I really do feel like a different person. I realise I need to swim for my own sanity...exercise pushes all those negative thoughts to the back of my mind. Hoping to have a walk later before tackling Sunday dinner. Take care & have a good Sunday. xx

[Change]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

Hi everyone,

Janet, i hope the job situation is improving.

Threedognight, well done on the aerobics. I highly doubt whether i'd be able to get through a full class! 50 mins on the treadmill is enough at this stage!

Hey Janice, i completely understand those feelings of loneliness. I have been experiencing them in droves lately. The way that i deal with it is to rationalise with myself and tell myself, it's okay to feel this way sometimes. Keeping yourself busy is a plus too, especially if it involves a setting with other people in it. Hell, i sometimes go to the gym just to see another human being for the day!

I've been having those horrible thoughts of "it's okay to drink now, one won't hurt you, you can moderate" BS. It's really hard to fight. Heck, i nearly caved on the weekend, thinking that one small bottle of red wine will do me for the night.

But, then i remembered, it's not the night that counts. It's every day afterwards, and i am not going to be the same person that i am if i start drinking again. The way that i put it out of my head was to think about how i would feel physically and mentally the next day.

So, yeah, almost 30 days for me (except for one spread out stubbie of beer which i am not counting!).

[Janice]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

Morning everyone...Hi Change, nearly 30 days well done!! Yep it definitely helps to think beyond actually taking the drink and what it would lead us back to. I like to compare it to a fireplace with a load of ashes & cinders in which have gone down - one drink & that fire will be blazing away in no time and what's more each fire is bigger than the last. Best not to stoke it up eh?

No swimming today but might have a walk which always does my head good.

xx

[planetjanet]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

Hi Everyone,

A very quick hello...my hard drive crashed but it's fixed now however I lost all my stuff. Luckily it wasn't something major. Anywho writing from my iPad and already in bed...wow I also had to replace my phone because it fell in the toliet..LOL. My sister who lives North Carolina called last Thursday saying she got busted for a DUI and sad thing is she in total denial about her drinking, so sad. I have lots more to write but need to get myself up EARLY!

Anywho bed time for me...lots of hugs! You guys are my thoughts will check back in tomorrow, this typing on the iPad while in bed is alittle tricky

Hugs,
Janet

[ThreeDogNight]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

Good morning, everyone!

Janet, so sorry about all the tech problems:upset: Hope it all gets straightened out for you. And sorry about your sister. I wonder how long she'll lose her license for? Maybe this will end her denial--maybe not. I don't know how I got through over a year without my license, but never want to go through that again! Even with the annoying Intoxalock, I can at least get myself where I need/want to go.

How is everyone else doing?

I am going to work from home today--trying to gte contacts for this new job is going to take time--hoping the company can get me more info than I already have!

Went to a Zumba class last night--had been almost two years--and it was great, and I did really well! I am surprising myself with being able to keeep up with the classes. Today I may go to an "old lady" line dancing class, and know I won't ork up a sweat there:H

Have a great AF day, all!

[Ishybit]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

Hello everyone!
Congratulations Balboa45, change and Mal on your nearing 30 days or passing it! It's such a huge and satisfying accomplishment. I remember thinking that every fricken day was a feat in and of itself. Well done, it really does get easier but you have to be prepared for surprises, WHAM, they can come outta nowhere.
Janice, I too get lonely and can suffer from low self esteem. its not nearly as bad as when i was drinking. i really hated myself then. Exercise is critical to my mental well being.
I'm going to renew my commitment to myself and to all of you posting here more often, stay connected. You've all helped me so much!
Have a great day everyone!
Ishy

[planetjanet]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

Hello Everyone,

Congrats to you Balboa45, Change, Mal and anybody else I missed on celebrating 30 days....phewy it was tough at times but you did it...YIPPPPPEEEEE!! Just wait to you get to 2 months, then 3 months before you know it you will in the triple digits. When I first started this thread, I had surrendered and decided that I was going to start a 30 day thread and wow here I am now having just celebrated 9 months on February 2nd. It's just a great feeling to have so many wonderful people like yourselves sign on to this thread.

Way to go on the exercise, keep it up!!! I definitely think exercise is so good for you and it really does help with depression and loneliness but the best part is taking a nice cat nap afterwards. I have decided to "raise the bar" and start training for an event that is called the Tough Muddler (check it out on YouTube), the event will be in June and I am VERY confident that I can do this. However, oh wow, do I have to really, really, train hard for this one. TDN, sad to say that my sister does not think she has a problem with alcohol and doesn't think she "drank that much"...yikes that scared me when she told me that. They told her she can't drive for ten days and probably will just give her a restricted license for awhile.

Anywho, it's late...heading to bed...with check back in tomorrow. So, nice to read your posts....

Hugs,
Janet
AF Day 288

[Shay-lyn]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

I just feel really sick..I have never done this before with anyone..I have been an alcoholic and a drug user since I was 13....I am now 40...I just don't even know where to begin....I was also abused as a child...I know I'm flailing on here but I don't know how to do this or what to say...

[planetjanet]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

Welcome Shay-lyn,

I am sorry that you fell prey to being an abused child. I too, was abused and it definitely had alot to do with why I drank. Self medicate was a word I learned very early on about my drinking but now I realized that I don't need to live like that and finally one day the "don't" became a "want" and here I am 9 months later....ALCOHOL FREE!!! If I can do this, so can you.....stay strong, keep posting and figure out a plan that you can do to achieve your goals with doing away with alcohol. There are alot of wonderful people here to give you lots of advice and support. We are here because we have all been there done that and we don't judge.

Lots of hugs to you...

Janet
AF Day 289

[ThreeDogNight]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

:welcome:Sahy-Lynn.

This is a great place for help and advice, so glad you've joined us. There are many here who have gone through the same things you have. I hope you'll stick around and tell us more about yoursefl.

:lTDN

[Change]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

Janice;1456574 wrote: Yep it definitely helps to think beyond actually taking the drink and what it would lead us back to. I like to compare it to a fireplace with a load of ashes & cinders in which have gone down - one drink & that fire will be blazing away in no time and what's more each fire is bigger than the last.

Nice analogy Janice.

Nice to hear that everyone is doing well, except your sister PlanetJanet.

I had a close call last night, when a drunk friend invited me over. I thought about it heaps and then decided i did not need the temptation, nor his raving!

I am really worried. I have a holiday planned in a month and will be staying with this heavy drinker friend. Last time i spoke with him, he said he was cutting down due to the same reasons i have eventually quit, however, yesterday, he was fully tanked. It kind of makes me angry that he has this other friend who is a heavy drinker and kind of uses him as an outlet for his own sad life. But, anyway.

Currently, i actually don't feel like a bevvy. I am just a bit worried about this holiday and am going to have to think about it carefully, in terms of whether i'll moderate or abstain altogether. I'd rather abstain, but feel i could be temped. . In my heart of hearts, i do not want to drink... I only hope that i am strong enough not to get fed up with this friend and turn to alcohol.

[Ishybit]

Anyone Up For 30 Day AF

Hi and welcome Shay-lyn and hello to everyone else!
Shay, you have come to the right place and you have taken the first big scary steps. There are so many people on this website who will support you and guide you thru. You can do it. I remember the first time I posted on a website, I was terrified of everything,... First, I was admitting it, yikes! How would my life change, do people know its me, will they find out, I'm not sure i really want this, I'm not nearly as bad as some others, blah,blah. Bottom line is that I hated myself and I was soo depressed, if I could just get this monkey off my back.
I'm sure there's a lot of shit you'll have to deal but it really gets better and you'll start to like yourself. I promise.
Hang in there everyone, have a great day!
Ishy