Need Grocery Store Help!

[Mein Sonnenschein]

Hi All, I need some help for this evening. I have to go to the grocery store and I need some tips on how to avoid the alcohol section. In Germany, beer, wine and liquor is sold in the grocery store. And in the store where I usually shop, the alcohol is right next to eh check out counters... they also sell mini bottles at the check out counter, next to the candy. I would switch stores but my only other option where I live is a very small grocery store with a small produce section (I need to stock up on veggies for my juicer). Last time I was grocery shopping I effed up and bought a bottle of Jack. It was just so tempting. I guess I was feeling the anxiety of having no alcohol in my house so I needed to re-stock. But of course I drank the entire bottle in one evening. How do I shop today without drifting toward my go-to Jack? Please help if you have any suggestions.

Today I am only 5 days AF.

[Rainyday]

Need Grocery Store Help!

That is just RUDE! Right with the candy!

Go to the store with a full belly? Very very very full belly. Full bellies don't care too much for booz.

[NoSugar]

Need Grocery Store Help!

Mein Sonnenschein;1453520 wrote: Hi All, I need some help for this evening. I have to go to the grocery store and I need some tips on how to avoid the alcohol section. In Germany, beer, wine and liquor is sold in the grocery store. And in the store where I usually shop, the alcohol is right next to eh check out counters... they also sell mini bottles at the check out counter, next to the candy. I would switch stores but my only other option where I live is a very small grocery store with a small produce section (I need to stock up on veggies for my juicer). Last time I was grocery shopping I effed up and bought a bottle of Jack. It was just so tempting. I guess I was feeling the anxiety of having no alcohol in my house so I needed to re-stock. But of course I drank the entire bottle in one evening. How do I shop today without drifting toward my go-to Jack? Please help if you have any suggestions.

Today I am only 5 days AF.

Hi, I am in the US. Alcohol is sold in the grocery store in my state, also. I was really embarrassed once in a state that sells alcohol only in state-run stores when I asked the clerk where the wine was. She looked at me like I was a nut (of course, I thought at the time that she looked at me like I was a total alcoholic...!). So, in the US, that is something that varies from state to state. I wish mine had the state-run stores and collected all of those taxes on this nasty stuff.

This is my plan (which I will need to implement later today, also): Have a list and tell yourself you will ONLY BUY WHAT IS ON THAT LIST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good luck! We can do it!!!!!

[Byrdlady]

Need Grocery Store Help!

M.S. Here's what I did...before I got into the store (and had worked myself up into a state of panic)...I visualize STRAWBERRIES :strawberry:. Over in the U.S. they are packaged in green cardboard or plastic containers, the more accurate you can make your 'picture' the better. I imagined taking a big smell of those wonderful ripe berries and how good that made me feel! As soon as I got in the store...I grabbed a pack of strawberries put them front and center of my cart or held them in my hand!!! ... then did the rest of my shopping, and got out safe and sound. Setting my mind on a task really worked for me. Those berries required attention...when you get home to need to sort them out, so this was something for me to think about instead of NOT buying the booze! Like on a old tv show I saw once time....when someone tells you NOT to think of a blue horse....that's ALL you can see!!! It may not be strawberries for you, but it sure helped me...Byrdie

[Nelz]

Need Grocery Store Help!

Dang, that's horrible, I wasnt aware Germany was like that. Only thing I can come up with is maybe take someone with. You dont have to tell them whats going on, just tell yourself you wont buy AL in front of someone else.

Its kind of a faux accountability if you will.........last option would be to wear those horse blinders so you cant see it...............:H

Wishing you some extra strength, strength tonight

[K9Lover]

Need Grocery Store Help!

I walked past the alcohol aisle and flipped it off :finger:
I remembered all the pain and misery that bastard alcohol caused me. Get MAD at it...think of what it's done to you. You wouldn't let a person treat you as bad as alcohol did!

Each time will get easier, I promise!

[Alcoholic]

Need Grocery Store Help!

Other than bringing a buddy, taking Antabuse, telling clerk not to sell it to you... I really don't know what else to suggest... Or only bring enough cash for the grocery... Don't bring extra cash and no credit cards w you!!!

[NoSugar]

Need Grocery Store Help!

K9Lover;1453564 wrote: I walked past the alcohol aisle and flipped it off :finger:
I remembered all the pain and misery that bastard alcohol caused me. Get MAD at it...think of what it's done to you. You wouldn't let a person treat you as bad as alcohol did!

Each time will get easier, I promise!

What makes me made are all the attractive 'wine displays' set up all over our grocery stores! They are in the deli section, the fish section, on endcaps, etc. etc.

Avoiding the main alcohol aisle isn't enough, unfortunately.

I think our society needs an overhaul!!

[Hippyman]

Need Grocery Store Help!

Byrdlady;1453534 wrote: M.S. Here's what I did...before I got into the store (and had worked myself up into a state of panic)...I visualize STRAWBERRIES :strawberry:. Over in the U.S. they are packaged in green cardboard or plastic containers, the more accurate you can make your 'picture' the better. I imagined taking a big smell of those wonderful ripe berries and how good that made me feel! As soon as I got in the store...I grabbed a pack of strawberries put them front and center of my cart or held them in my hand!!! ... then did the rest of my shopping, and got out safe and sound. Setting my mind on a task really worked for me. Those berries required attention...when you get home to need to sort them out, so this was something for me to think about instead of NOT buying the booze! Like on a old tv show I saw once time....when someone tells you NOT to think of a blue horse....that's ALL you can see!!! It may not be strawberries for you, but it sure helped me...Byrdie

Brydie has excellent advise. I remember that it wasn't long ago that I was afraid to go to the grocery store. It was where I used to fill my cart with poison. I'm on a medication that numbs any desire for alcohol so it's not a problem for me anymore. The visualizing strawberries or some other healthy alternative may help. Also make sure your belly is FULL before you go shopping. That may help as well.

[Byrdlady]

Need Grocery Store Help!

NoSugar, Running Courage and I were discussing this over the holidays...he said that the commercials would come on tv and make him want to rush to the store and buy whiskey...something he never even drank!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Then I saw the commercial and had to agree! They make it look so enticing and alluring...but that's not how I drank...I drank in frantic gulps in my closet from a hidden bottle....if they'd show AL like that they wouldn't sell much of it!! The marketing of AL is amazing...Kuya says to picture it like embalming fluid....YOURS!! :shocked:

[aihflvt]

Need Grocery Store Help!

Sonnenschein, G?ten Tag - wie gehts? Bitte vergeben Sie meinen schlechten Versuch an Deutsch. Ich habe es for vielen Jahren studiert.

I was going to suggest a smaller grocery store that doesn't sell alcohol, but on second look at your post, you said that wasn't an option. Since you're still struggling, I like the suggestion of taking a friend with you. It's amazing how some of our most daily basic routines become associated with alcohol over time. For me, it was cooking. I like to cook and I'd like to think I'm a decent cook, but it was always something I did while tipsy or drunk. People who care about us will help us until we are able to un-learn those associations.

[NoSugar]

Need Grocery Store Help!

Byrdlady;1453613 wrote: NoSugar, Running Courage and I were discussing this over the holidays...he said that the commercials would come on tv and make him want to rush to the store and buy whiskey...something he never even drank!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Then I saw the commercial and had to agree! They make it look so enticing and alluring...but that's not how I drank...I drank in frantic gulps in my closet from a hidden bottle....if they'd show AL like that they wouldn't sell much of it!! The marketing of AL is amazing...Kuya says to picture it like embalming fluid....YOURS!! :shocked:

Very good visualization techniques! I will give them a try.

When I drank with friends (you know, the perfect wine to compliment the main course with its undertones of berries and roots and the ability to form perfect legs on the glass...), it looked like it does in commercials. Maybe for the other people at the table it felt that way, too, but not to me! It would occur to me that if I always drank as I do in a group and only once in awhile, it would not be a problem. But - that role was a big fake - I was playing 'normal drinker'. In private, a slug of cheap wine out of the bottle was just fine with me.

We all just need to ignore the commercials, print ads, and fancy in-store displays and pity the people who continue to be seduced by expert marketers who definitely do not have our best interests at heart!

[Mein Sonnenschein]

Need Grocery Store Help!

aihflvt;1453658 wrote: Sonnenschein, G?ten Tag - wie gehts? Bitte vergeben Sie meinen schlechten Versuch an Deutsch. Ich habe es for vielen Jahren studiert.

I was going to suggest a smaller grocery store that doesn't sell alcohol, but on second look at your post, you said that wasn't an option. Since you're still struggling, I like the suggestion of taking a friend with you. It's amazing how some of our most daily basic routines become associated with alcohol over time. For me, it was cooking. I like to cook and I'd like to think I'm a decent cook, but it was always something I did while tipsy or drunk. People who care about us will help us until we are able to un-learn those associations.

Dein deutsch ist sehr gut! My German is still lacking. I am learning at the Volkshofschule. But it is taking longer than I anticipated. I am so lonely here.

I want to say a big Thank You to all who responded to this request. I really tried the visualization... I love avocados, so i tried to only think of avacodo while I was shopping. But unfortunately I could not stay away from the Jack. This is the only friend I have in Germany, so of course I am hesitant to give this up. My husband tells me it is my fault that I have no friends. I guess that is true since I am not one of those "go out and meet 'um" type of people. I wish I was. So so very lonely here.

[Mein Sonnenschein]

Need Grocery Store Help!

The marketing is definitely false! I also can not drink a few drinks a be OK with it. I admit that now. Part of this is depression, part of this is anxiety... I have horrible social anxiety. I can not imagine meeting people without alcohol, especially as an American in Germany. Most of my social interactions have not gone well. I'm just so nervous and I always have to explain why I can not speak perfect German. I miss home so much. But back to the topic... yes, the media is pushing this instead of helping. I even see print ads and feel like "I" can have a drink, when of course I can not. I have to grow stronger myself because I don't see this going away any time soon.

[Byrdlady]

Need Grocery Store Help!

"I can not imagine meeting people without alcohol"

Well, I'm here to tell you, you CAN do this! I didn't think I could ever go to a party and ever be the life of the party like I used to be, but guess what? I can and I do! YOU are under there. Whatever you think AL brings out IS under there...where do you think it comes from? It's YOU! AL is just a crutch we use. AL is an excuse. AL is the problem! Please hop back on the wagon ....it takes some time! You have come a long way in admitting that you can't have just one...that is a big deal in our world. If an old drunk like me can do this, I know you can, too! Pour out the rest of that Jack, and get your life back!! The answers you are looking for are not in the bottom of that bottle...I looked! You can do this!!! Byrdie