depression on day 1?

[Byrdlady]

depression on day 1?

I actually think there are two relationships here, Inchy: The one with you and your fianc? and the one with Alcohol....right now it looks like the one with AL is winning. It's probably going to come down to your having to choose...It came down to that for me, and it was a hard choice, but my hubs got sick and tired of my excuses, my lies, and my crazy off the wall behavior. I ran out of other things to blame, I finally had to look in the mirror and it was hard.
I'm not a big fan of Dr. Phil, but he does say something that makes a person think... How is your way working for you so far?
Best of luck in whichever way you choose to go. B

[InChains]

depression on day 1?

byrdlady: I'm making the relationship with my fiance the priority, as of today. I am not going cold turkey, i tried it, I got depressed, it was dangerous for me. But I am cutting down, I've worked out a schedule for going from 5, to 2.5, to nought in the next 3 weeks with my partner, he's helping by making sure I only have enough booze in the house for one night at a time, sad it came to that but he understands and is helping me. I'm still drinking socially for now, but we're eliminating that slowly too. I genuinely look forward to being able to post AF here really soon.

To all: I am sorry if I went off the deep end. Some of your comments, whatever the truth of your intentions, did seem to me to say things about my relationship with my fiance that I was not happy about. He is a great guy and a real help to me. We decided to get married at a young age and I am very used to our relationship being judged and having to defend my decision to be with him simply because of our age. I hope you understand that if you were not judging us, I have nothing against you, and that now you can see why I am very sensitive to any attempt to criticize my choice to be with my partner.

[dixon]

depression on day 1?

InChains;1485668 wrote: I didn't drink friday and experienced the most severe depression I have known in my life, yesterday was one of my drinking days in the week and I was so relieved. I am attempting to be AF again today, but am genuinely afraid of what is going to happen if I become that depressed again - I genuinely considered whether or not I should end my life, and lay awake until 2am considering this before finally managing to sleep. I am really scared that if I don't drink tonight i will do something stupid and I desparately need advice on whether there is anything I can do to prevent this depression from occurring so that I can quit drinking safely.

If it helps for advice giving purposes, I have been on 10 units a night average, with binges socially twice a week of about 15 units. I had a social binge last night. All of my drinking occurs late night, between 9pm and 1am.

thank you in advance for any advice you can give before tonight.

This is a bitter sweet and true beginning !!.I always try to retrain my mind that taking alcohol never an answer to depression.With 6 month AF, I have been able to cope everything in my life.But one relapse really took all of my pleasures away !!
AL is hell !
Dix

[dixon]

depression on day 1?

Ann Carolina;1485834 wrote: NOONE said JACK about your fiance or your relationship. It was all about YOU and your excuses for drinking.

You refuse to be an asshole to the man you love?? THEN DON"T. Do you not realize how absurd that sounds?

Very true to me as well !

[kuya]

depression on day 1?

Sounds like you are terrified Inchy. Not just by what you are writing today, but some other statements on other threads.

OK......since the thought of going AF terrifies you and your fianc? is supportive, why not get him to limit your medication ( which is how you are currently using alcohol) to two drinks a night for, say three months.

After that period of time you could revisit the problem as a healthier person with less anxiety.

I also suggest you start using GABA or theanine or tryptophan and melatonin to increase your serotonin levels and reduce your anxiety BEFORE you try abstainance again.

Try not to get angry with folk when you don't like the advice ......it is kinda shooting the messenger. We are all just trying to help love :l

[RunningCourage]

depression on day 1?

kuya;1485929 wrote: Sounds like you are terrified Inchy. Not just by what you are writing today, but some other statements on other threads.

OK......since the thought of going AF terrifies you and your fianc? is supportive, why not get him to limit your medication ( which is how you are currently using alcohol) to two drinks a night for, say three months.

After that period of time you could revisit the problem as a healthier person with less anxiety.

I also suggest you start using GABA or theanine or tryptophan and melatonin to increase your serotonin levels and reduce your anxiety BEFORE you try abstainance again.

Try not to get angry with folk when you don't like the advice ......it is kinda shooting the messenger. We are all just trying to help love :l

Smart. Sage advice.

[InChains]

depression on day 1?

hey kuya, thanks for the advice but unfortunately one of the main reasons for me trying to deal with this quickly is that in 5 and a half months I will be moving away form home for the first time to go to uni, I will be miles away from my fiance and only see him twice a week, and will be in a completely new and very tempting situation - I want to have a strong AF period before that to try and make it easier for me. I'm also very averse to using any kind of medication - I'm not normally anxious, I'm only anxious around alcohol, in daily life I am a very laid back person.

The plan now is to half my intake this week, half again next week and then cut to nothing in the third week, use the next 2 weeks to build up other aspects of my life so hopefully the gap left when I quit completely is smaller. So far only negatives of current half 'dose' is craving and insomnia, massively better than being af was for me.

[kuya]

depression on day 1?

The suggestions I made are supplements NOT drugs.......GABA helped me enormously the first couple of weeks.

[gyco]

depression on day 1?

hi Chains Kuya is rite you dont have to use behind the counter meds for withdrawl number one is you have to come off of them later and trust me its usually worse then the booze,i read an article years ago and all try to find it,,and i did try it and it did help with withdrawl,i think it was under doctors advise for withdrawl,its on the net,or you can do what i did last week and suffer thro withdrawl knowing how much it will hurt,i do wish you well,ending life is not the answer,over a Drink ?

[sugarbeat]

depression on day 1?

sending you some courage inchains, in you're current struggles, nothing much I can add that has not already been said. I've had a wee eye on your progress, I can identify with that fear and confusion alot.

I suppose you just need to pick a side, you need to quit, ur mind and life seems to be awfully consumed by drink. It would be great if you could find a non judgmental, unconditional friend to help you through the first couple of days with the help of your doctor if you can be honest with him, which is not always the easiest when you are in the eye of the storm.

Your depression and anxiety is not unique to you, many many people here had to face it, it seems to me you're taking the long painful route to possible sobriety, your head might tell you its your best choice at the moment but I promise you its not, the other option is a little rougher at the start, but not half as painful in the long run, with a little help you can do it.

Remember things really aren't as bad as your head is telling you now, made a choice, and I look forward to your true authentic self surfing these boards, ur a super talented young woman, with loads going for you but I don't believe you can genuinely see that, under the spell of alcohol

[InChains]

depression on day 1?

kuya: sorry for confusion - don't know where you are, but UK classes melatonin as a prescription only medication, not a supplement, I figured the others were similar (which they may be, UK availability of some things is very unusual)

gyco: thanks for the advice, I have no intention of using drugs in withdrawal, earlier in my life I have smoked cannabis to relieve withdrawal and also took up smoking cigarettes in the same situation, couple of years later and I was addicted to all three, though pot and fags on a lower level. Have been without drugs now for about 4 months, and don't smoke cigarettes regularly either, but both were a royal pail to give up so I learned my lesson xD

Sugarbeat: sadly I don't have any friends like that, in fact my only close relationship is with my partner. I have always isolated myself and now have a wide circle of acquaintances but sadly nobody close to me. The way I am doing things now, and this is only a day in, but it seems to be working best for me and I believe I can be successful doing things this way.

[sugarbeat]

depression on day 1?

I'm still routing for you, I found that stuff that I heard months, years ago resonates with me now, keep listening to the good stuff, keep writing, suppose what I'm trying to say is I'd love you to raise you standards for yourself, ripe off the bandages and go for the whole package, experience life as the real you, there are wonderful things things waiting out there for you. I have suffered horribly internally with myself with alcoholism, couldn't tolerate hanging out with myself without drink, sat debating everything by myself, and I found no solutions there, no peace of mind. I was lonely lonely lonely, and clung onto anything in my life that I perceived as good by disguising myself or changing into someone I thought people would like with drink, there was no substance to it, and what I found on the other side was a pretty damn groovy me, that I like and is genuine.

Don't suppose your a fan of AA, even for the short term, you might get the support you need there, this forum is a brilliant resource but nothing like the old face to face, PM me anytime

[InChains]

depression on day 1?

thanks sugarbeat but face to face is not for me, I don't like to be around people at the best of times, I like being alone, even being on a forum is a very social move for me. Your support is much appreciated though, and I'm glad you've found yourself n are happier

[K9Lover]

depression on day 1?

Hi Inchy,

I just wanted to pop in and see how you are and let you know I'm here for you and I wish you the best of luck. Please continue to keep us posted!

Love,
K9

[mama bear]

depression on day 1?

me too Inchy!