old hat frm 2007

[Bella]

Hi. This is a place i feel safe. Im bella. Ive been posting on a new site called HAVOCA. Stands for...'help for adults who are victims of child abuse.' Just wanted to say hello. I drink. Im seeking help. I am finally seeing a therapist but find it hard to talk. I joined this site a long time ago but was always pretending. I wear a happy mask most of my life..im 44. Anyway..wanted to check in with anyone who remembers me or anyone else. Im taking the bull by the horns now coz ive developed into an alcoholic...its hard to admit this. Its taken yrs. Im beginning to address my madness frm my past..and it wasnt my fault!! Lol. But ive used alcohol as a tool rather than a 'social thang.' Its gonna be a choice for me..its whether i choose to take the best route or bury my head in the sand again. Thanx for listening. Bella x:thanks:

[red67]

old hat frm 2007

Hi Bella, welcome back!

This is a place I feel safe too. No matter how long I am sober I still need this place and all the support here. I too always feel the need to be happy and make people happy. I have been learning over the past 2 years to assert myself a little more, but truthfully I love being happy. Sometimes when I am down and need to pretend to be happy for other people it really does end up lifting my mood.

I am 46 years old and got sober at 44 so we have that in common too.

This place is a lifesaver for me. I hope it will be for you too. Maybe you can start back in the Newbies Nest and/or take a look at the tool box. You can get sober and be truly happy for real.

[Guitarista]

old hat frm 2007

Hi Bella,

Nice to see you again mate.

I'm so sorry to hear of the abuse, and no, it is not your fault.

Getting real with ourselves and grabbing the bull by the horns is what it's all about.

I wish you well with therapy, and i'm glad you have found the other site for support.

You are not alone. Reaching out for support is the big and important first step to taking back our lives.

The Newbies nest thread is a great one to have a look at here.

:goodjob:

[Bella]

old hat frm 2007

Guitarista..hi. thanks mate. Still kicking the tunes u i bet. Bella xxx

[Guitarista]

old hat frm 2007

Bella;1520016 wrote: Guitarista..hi. thanks mate. Still kicking the tunes u i bet. Bella xxx

Yep, you betcha! Are you making any art?

[hadit]

old hat frm 2007

Hello Bella, welcome back. We are here for each other OK? The Abuse is not your faultJust scream out when you need us.

[Snapdragon]

old hat frm 2007

Hi Bella - and welcome back! You're amongst friends here so pull up a comfy chair and grab yourself a coffee! I know what you mean about it being hard to talk when you first see a therapist - the first few weeks I went I just sat and mumbled a few things about the weather etc and didn't know what I was supposed to say.

Once you realise that 1) NOTHING you tell the councellor will shock them (you can guarantee they've heard most of it before), 2) they are NOT going to judge you and 3) they really do understand how and why you feel how you do and can help you work things out for yourself - you will finally feel a massive weight off your shoulders and will start to feel that you can turn your life around.

:welcome:

[Wagoneer]

old hat frm 2007

Hey Bella! Welcome back I, too, was a victim of abuse in my childhood, and other abuse as an adult and that was part of my drinking issues. Those days are long gone, although they rear their ugly heads sporadically. Don't reach for the drink anymore though, thankfully. I wish you the best, and we are all in the same boat. We are here for you

Love Waggy