I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep. It just burns through my soul that I could've done such a thing. We didn't have sex but I was still naked in bed with another girl and it kills me. I thought about it long and hard... I desperately want to continue my relationship with my girlfriend because I thought of marrying her once I'm done with university. We've been officially together for 2 months and she's the best thing that has happened to me.
I've decided not to tell her about the whole thing, because never will I commit such a crime again. I'm suffering the guilt myself and I don't want to share the hurt with her. My relationship would definitely end if I tell her. Worse is that she has anxiety attacks and hearing this might literally kill her. I cried in front of my friends and they told me they'll do whatever it takes to help me continue my relationship. Bad things happens when I'm drunk and this time I've hit rock bottom.
I've promised to abstain from alcohol entirely now, as it was the root of the problem. But the guilt still lingers and it's something that I have to suffer with alone. It's killing me. I need to let the past go and it's only been 3 days. I found this website to release my bottled emotions and I'm hoping someone, anyone could tell me how I can erase this memory and become the perfect boyfriend for her again. Please don't bash me, I've learnt from my mistake and I just wish to forget about it, but don't know how. My girlfriend is coming back in 3 days. Please tell me how to face her. I'm as sincere as I can be right now.
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