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    #1

    I Cheated on my girlfriend while Drunk. Please help.

    It was a trip with my 3 guy buddies and my girlfriend was on a holiday overseas with her family. At night we went to a club/bar and started drinking heavily. I have a low tolerance for alcohol and I'm a completely different person while drunk. When we went back to the hotel there were so many pimps who approached us and offered us ladies. My lapse of judgement caused me to take one of the girls to my room while one of my other friend took the another. I felt dizzy while I undressed my self and once I was on the bed, I realised the grave mistake I've made. I snapped out of it and told myself and her that I have a girlfriend and she should just give me a massage instead. She did. After it was done I quickly ran to my friend's room and started crying for I've betrayed the trust of the girl I loved most.

    I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep. It just burns through my soul that I could've done such a thing. We didn't have sex but I was still naked in bed with another girl and it kills me. I thought about it long and hard... I desperately want to continue my relationship with my girlfriend because I thought of marrying her once I'm done with university. We've been officially together for 2 months and she's the best thing that has happened to me.

    I've decided not to tell her about the whole thing, because never will I commit such a crime again. I'm suffering the guilt myself and I don't want to share the hurt with her. My relationship would definitely end if I tell her. Worse is that she has anxiety attacks and hearing this might literally kill her. I cried in front of my friends and they told me they'll do whatever it takes to help me continue my relationship. Bad things happens when I'm drunk and this time I've hit rock bottom.

    I've promised to abstain from alcohol entirely now, as it was the root of the problem. But the guilt still lingers and it's something that I have to suffer with alone. It's killing me. I need to let the past go and it's only been 3 days. I found this website to release my bottled emotions and I'm hoping someone, anyone could tell me how I can erase this memory and become the perfect boyfriend for her again. Please don't bash me, I've learnt from my mistake and I just wish to forget about it, but don't know how. My girlfriend is coming back in 3 days. Please tell me how to face her. I'm as sincere as I can be right now.
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    #2
    I Cheated on my girlfriend while Drunk. Please help.

    Chin up friend. You caught yourself in time and you recognized where you went wrong. Make a plan and stick to it so you never have to feel this way again! You can do it!
    Day 1 again 11/5/19
    Goal 1: 7 days :heartbeat:
    Goal 2: 14 days :happy2:
    Goal 3: 21 days :happy2:
    11/27/19: messed up but back on track
    12/14/19: bad doozy but back on track

    One day at a time.

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      #3
      I Cheated on my girlfriend while Drunk. Please help.

      Fruit juice, you sound very remorseful and this probably will stick with you for awhile. Since you are adamant about not doing anything like that again, I support your decision not to tell her. Just another stupid thing that alcohol can make us do. Ugh! Good luck. Peace

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        #4
        I Cheated on my girlfriend while Drunk. Please help.

        Alcohol did this to you.
        I used the Sinclair Method to beat my alcoholic drinking.

        Drank within safe limits for almost 2 years

        AF date 22/07/13

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          #5
          I Cheated on my girlfriend while Drunk. Please help.

          ehh,quit trippin,you stopped yourself in time,just dont put yourself in that position again
          I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

          I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
          Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

          Comment

            #6
            I Cheated on my girlfriend while Drunk. Please help.

            You stopped yourself from going through with it.

            If I were you, I would definitely NOT tell her about this. It wont help you any, and it will hurt her and possibly destroy your relationship. Even if it doesnt, that issue will always be lingering and can cause major problems out of nowhere even years from now. Examine the other issue. Did drinking directly cause this?

            Dont keep punishing yourself. Chock it up as a life lesson and move on.

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              #7
              I Cheated on my girlfriend while Drunk. Please help.

              Well Juice I'd say you have a very bright future. No reason to start comparing "rock bottoms" bit if that's yours you should be fine...good luck

              Comment

                #8
                I Cheated on my girlfriend while Drunk. Please help.

                Move on

                In spite of anxiety attacks, I seriously doubt that this information would "literally kill her".
                We tend to make a catastrophe out of this type of thing. I agree that you should not tell her. It was stupid, granted, but you did not do what you could have done.

                When alcohol contributes to bad judgement, regret and shame it's time to put a stop to it. Just my opinion.

                I gather that you are very young, so you have a great opportunity to live a fuller and longer life by realizing these things sooner rather than later. It was a mistake. It was a result of alcohol loosening inhibitions. Not an uncommon occurrence.

                Think it through and stop beating yourself up. You can't change the past but you can damn sure create a better future.

                Take care

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                  #9
                  I Cheated on my girlfriend while Drunk. Please help.

                  It would have been the alcohol and some other reasons most likely related to your self esteem (and not your girlfriend) but largely exacerbated by alcohol.
                  Shame is other peoples opinions pushed on to you, drop it off. Guilt is real and needs to be worked through, in essence you need to be more nurturing to yourself and don't be hard on yourself.
                  It sounds like your mates didn't look after you in a time of vulnerability, I know people will say you should take the responsibility yourself but thats horse$hit as far as I'm concerned. There is a collective responsibility for the group.

                  Alcohol deconstructs your boundaries thus leaving you open to being taken advantage of, there is a reason its the oldest profession in the world.

                  Good luck!

                  Comment

                    #10
                    I Cheated on my girlfriend while Drunk. Please help.

                    Balboa45;1537128 wrote: Well Juice I'd say you have a very bright future. No reason to start comparing "rock bottoms" bit if that's yours you should be fine...good luck
                    Well said, seriously "rock bottoms" for many are a long, long way down and some never hit theirs.
                    On a mission, and the only option is success. My family and I deserve a better life, an AF life.:h

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                      #11
                      I Cheated on my girlfriend while Drunk. Please help.

                      Ann Carolina;1537151 wrote: You can't change the past but you can damn sure create a better future.
                      Ann Carolina, I am having this quote tatooed on my arm, just kidding, but I love it!
                      On a mission, and the only option is success. My family and I deserve a better life, an AF life.:h

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                        #12
                        I Cheated on my girlfriend while Drunk. Please help.

                        Your average politician would argue that you didn't really cheat If this is your "rock bottom," you learned your lesson a lot sooner than many of did.
                        In the middle of my life's journey, I found myself in a dark wood, as I had lost the straight path. It is a difficult thing to speak about, how wild, harsh and impenetrable that wood is. Just thinking about it recreates the fear. It is scarcely less bitter than death, but in order to tell of the good that I found there, I must tell of the other things I saw there. --Dante, paraphrased

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