Drink has taken over :-(

[newbeginnings14]

I am a mum of three beautiful children. I love them to death and would do anything for them which is why Im here. I split with their dad 4 years ago and we both met other people, then both relationships failed and we decided to try again last summer. I had always enjoyed a drink, starting at age 14, im now 35. I would say that while I have been on my own I have drunk way too much. Ive been hiding bottles, arguing, lying to family, and treating people like complete crap. This is only when I have had a drink and when sober, I am very apologetic and am completely disgusted with myself the next day. I explained to my husband that I had an alcohol problem and that I needed his help, but he gave me an hour to pack my things and to leave the house and take the kids. I know this seems a social problem, but every aspect of my life seems to be going very wrong and its down to the drink. Physically I feel sick and shake if I go without. I have been drinking up to 3 bottles of wine 12% per night for the past few weeks with only the occasional night off. I have been to the doctors and asked for medication but she just said come back in three weeks and we will see how you are then. She gave me antidepressants which has made me sick I told her how desperate I was, it took so much courage to confess to her but I suppose its a busy time of year :-(

[mama bear]

Drink has taken over :-(

New...
find a new doctor.....NOW
even if you have to go to the ER
and reach out to AA
You CAN do this......with proper support and learning new ways of living
My concern is your three children.....if you are a single mom for the moment, you have to be well for them
Much love and hugs

[NoSugar]

Drink has taken over :-(

Hi, New

I agree with Mama - it sounds like your doctor doesn't know what is going on in this area. Your husband's response also is not good. I'm so sorry you're not getting the support you need.

You will find help here :l. The Newbies Nest is a good place to start - the link is in my signature as is one to the Toolbox. If you haven't read through that yet, it is full of ideas for making a plan. A plan is critical because without one, it is too easy to slip back into destructive patterns.

You'll need to take good care of yourself while your body gets used to not getting the expected glasses of wine each night. Drink a lot of good fluids, eat well, ... treat yourself the way you would one of your children when he or she is sick.

Glad you found MWO!

:welcome:

[TrueGrit]

Drink has taken over :-(

Your husbands reaction when you were reaching out for help is selfish and disgusting to say the least. You finally admitted to someone you love and trust that you have a problem and he kicks you to the curb?

Forget it, don't worry about him and find a support system ASAP! Go to your mother, father, brother, sister or any friends that have been there for you in the past. Reach out to your oldest child because let me tell you something...I have two children myself and my oldest is 12, one of the best things I did recently was let him know that dad has a problem but Dad is going to work on it. Children are beautiful in this way as they love you unconditionally and seem to understand far more than most adults.

Another thing, drop your doc ASAP and find one that will empathize with you and try to understand your problems. I am sure you are hurting right now but you have people here that will listen and try to help as much as possible over the interwebs and I hope you keep coming back. But first find that support system in the real world, you are worth it and your children will see the amazing side of you!

[Poppykin123]

Drink has taken over :-(

Hi new, I was a wine drinker and know only to we'll how hard it is to stop! I went to my first AA meeting nearly a year ago and I wish I went 20 years ago! All I can tell u is that life is so much better not drinking! I hope u get the help and support you deserve! Keep checking in here, it is a great place and there is lots of support from people who truly understand! Your not alone.

[available]

Drink has taken over :-(

Hi new and welcome, I dont have anything more to add from what the guys said above but you need to stop drinking for yourself and your children. I realised too late that i was only a functioning mother when drinking but i still have a beautiful relationship with my children thank god. We cant take back the past but we can change the future.

Hugs and we are here.

[j-vo]

Drink has taken over :-(

New,
Welcome to MWO. You will find lots of support here, but I agree with Mama. You need to find a doctor you can trust. Can you cut down on your drinking a little at a time? There are ways to cut down so that you don't put yourself into any physical trauma.

[SKendall]

Drink has taken over :-(

I remember telling an alcohol therapist that I would do anything for my children. Her response was would you stay sober for them?

I applaud you for your wanting to get sober and boo to your dr.

[newbeginnings14]

Drink has taken over :-(

Thank you everyone :-) I am trying really hard but I do need a new doctor and some support. I only have my mum and my girls close to me, I did explain to my 15 and 13 year old recently about my problem, they already knew anyhow but I told them Im getting help and I want to get back to the "old" me. It was also my big brothers 8 year anniversary on the 2nd January, he died 2006 of a massive heroine and methodone overdose, and died on the street freezing. I think thats where my problems started, especially with my ex. he didnt even say anything to me about his anniversary although he knew him very well. I was pregnant at the time (didnt drink at all only on weekends and wasnt pregnant or breast feeding!) but I was so focused on my pregnancy and caring for two other children I didnt really get over my brother dying, and still havent. His song is "Daniel" by Elton John. The lyrics are very true to me and him as he was my big brother and I miss him! I dont want my mum to lose another child, she knows too but Im wearing her ears away with talking too much about it. Im sorry for going on! Thanks again and its so nice to know there are people over the WWW that care :-) x

[spuddleduck]

Drink has taken over :-(

newbeginings, welcome, im glad you have found us. sounds like you're not getting much support even though you are reaching out and asking for help. Well done for talking to you children about it, I do think children are a lot more aware of things than we realize. you're already doing well by realizing some of the issues that have sent you down this destructive path. read as much as you can here and keep posting to let us know how you are doing. YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
And get a new doctor asap

[Darkest Diamond]

Drink has taken over :-(

Please go to A and E then ask for valium that will help you to withdraw safely

[Bella]

Drink has taken over :-(

Hi there. Dont get here that often but had to write to u. I too was a wine drinker. I started going to aa meetings..and have a sponser now. Im 3 weeks sober...never done that..3 wks??!! Im proud. My advice to you? Find a meeting near u and go...it might savd your life and yes...life without alcohol is good. I also lost my big brother yrs ago. Keep strong my friend and ask for help..oh and yr gp needs to change her job xxall the best bells xxxxxx

[Wintyr]

Drink has taken over :-(

Hey new, quite a few similarities between you and I, I too lost my older brother his name was Daniel, a friend wrote part of that same song in a card to me, I also was too busy with my young children to grieve, wine is my choice as well 2 bottles plus and as you said in your title, its just taken over, I treat my husband like an emotional punching bag and get pretty nasty sometimes with my friends when I'm drinking and in a mood then feel like complete garbage, essentially like most of us I can relate to almost everything you said. I just wanted to give TSM a plug along with baclofen, its also is a very effective method of helping with the drink, I tried baclofen and so wanted it to work but the side effects where just too much for me so if you go that way and find that happening Id suggest giving naltrexone a go as well, I didn't read everyone's responses so if someones already mentioned that sorry for the repetition. Theres a site dedicated to it www.thesinclairemethod.net

cheers

[spicoli0420]

Drink has taken over :-(

That's absolutely terrible about your husband when you were just telling the truth. And I agree with everyone else find a new Dr who will actually listen to you and not just throw you on antidepressants. I am new too-I have only been sober 3 days-Some people I have read can taper off, but if I have one drink it turns into a long night of bottles. I have been using supplements and it seems to help with so of the withdrawal or cravings. A lot of people on this site recommend Khudzu and L-Glutamine to help with cravings and I have been taking both. I have also been taking Milk Thistle which helps repair the liver after years of poisoning it. Maybe these could help you too. I am new, but I am determined to beat this. I hope you feel better and we can both achieve our goals. Peace and happiness. Jeff

[NotHappyHourHappyLife]

Drink has taken over :-(

Hugs, New Beginnings~ I hope things are going well for you? I hope you have found a better doctor.

Don't be a stranger: many of us are in the same position. Your daughters ARE old enough to help you through this. Patty :hug: