Sometimes it just hits you. Sometimes it just comes in so crystal clear, and you know it has been worth the trouble. I had one of those moments this evening.
Today the weather was beautiful here. I worked outside in the yard, and played with the dogs quite a bit. I ran those dogs until all their rambunctious exuberance was spent. They settled down and needed to rest after I paid them the attention they always crave. The little beasts that they are.
So I had the urge to hit the treadmill again later on, and I pushed hard again. I set a new personal distance record for a 30-minute program of intervals. I am working to get a 10K run in before this year is out, and training hard to condition myself for that.
I was drenched in perspiration after the run, and immediately decided to walk outside on the back deck where the air had cooled off, and the sun had just gone below the horizon. A slight cool breeze was enough to dry me, but not chill me. The last light of the day was fading, and the stars started winking on one by one. My entire system was still intensely fired up, and my senses were very much heightened naturally. The trees are still bare from winter, and I could feel them just beginning to stir somehow, preparing to wake and grow leaves.
I think I was charged up with all those natural endorphins and things, and I could almost feel the blood and oxygen pulsing painlessly in my brain, and flowing through my lungs picking up the oxygen from the cool night air, and charging my system with goodness.
Everything was just right, and as the last sunlight faded, and the constellation Orion came into view, all was perfect. I was part of it all for once, just like it was when I was a little kid. I felt like I belonged in the universe for once.
I was completely, and totally, without a doubt sober. Every cell was sober and alive. Damn it felt good. I have not felt this particular sensation since before I began my descent in the fog of drinking. The healing and recovery is ongoing.
Just had to write this, because the good things are not written about often enough. Just a simple sensation of what the booze takes away so quickly from us, and takes so much time and effort to recover.
Neil-
807 days alcohol free
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