I don't want to be a downer, but I am only being honest. I keep asking myself when that magic moment will happen when I feel free. I know it won't. Don't get me wrong, I wake up every day and go through the day AF and feel wonderful for it. It does make me feel very very free. And most days I don't even want to drink anymore. The thought actually repulses me.
But then there are some times. I am being honest in admitting that I am having them more and more often. My work situation is very stessful right now and my kids are all moved out of the house. I'm in a change period in my life and I don't think I have ever gone through one of these without the alcohol before. I know these are not excuses to start drinking again and I won't. But sometimes I need a hand to hold.
Just because you are sober for a long time doesn't mean that every day still is so easy. I think there is something in the literature about the three or four year mark that crashes down on you. Sometimes day 6 zillion feels like day 2.
Sorry this is not more cheery and upbeat. But at least it is honest. I love all you guys........
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