30 days and beyond

[Heavenly]

After reading Kates thread and posting, (thanks for the suggestion) I thought I would start the thread for those of us who are 30 days and beyond ... hopefully as we go along we change and grow, developing into what we should always have been.

For me personally I do wish I had 'woken up' at 21 instead of 41 but I didn't and here I am. I am interested in doing so much now, I do want to lose more weight and change my own mindset regards healthy eating (not weight loss diets) and my mental health.

I want to be happy. I want to make others happy too.
I see I can do this by maintaining my sobriety. I make others proud to know me when I am sober.
I want to do things for people that I only ever dreamt about when drinking like driving my kids to events or picking them up from their friends houses at night (not even late at night, but I was too drunk to drive most nights by 7pm).
I can help other people by doing things for them to make their life easier when I am sober and not hungover, I am also reliable when I am sober.

So anyone who is over 30 days and aiming for a lifetime of sobriety please come and join us and lets give each other long term support.

[LVT25]

30 days and beyond

Heavenly--

I gained so much from the "Day 31 and Beyond" thread when I was at that point. Your goals and reasons for maintaining sobriety are VERY much like my own. Especially the one about picking up your kids. I let my kids go to more things (we live 10 miles from town) and even though I still don't LIKE to get out at night to pick them up-esp when it's cold, at least I can. There were plenty of times they had to stay at a friend's or one of us would go get them when we shouldn't have been driving.

Thanks for starting this thread--I think it's great! :goodjob:

[startingover]

30 days and beyond

I am deadly serious about my sobriety. I want to move on with my life in a positve manner. I dont want to just stagnate in the same way that I was as a drunk. I want to grow and learn with my new found strength and determination. I never want to get so low again that I wanted to die. I am at a cross roads right now as I have been made redundant from my job. I have a lot of time on my hands, I need to find a new direction and not let myself sink into any type of depression. I love the idea of this thread.

[KateH1]

30 days and beyond

Thanks for starting this thread, Heavenly!

Although I had a problem with alcohol from the first time I drank during my senior year in HS...I did not take drinking up as an avocation until my late 30's. I just did not drink very much during college and while my kids were small...(thank god!) During my late 30's my kids were teenagers and great kids, no complaints there, but I was misserable in my marriage....long story.....done with that one! I also became an executive with a large cosmetic company and began traveling a lot for work. I loved my job, it was high stress....but very rewarding! My drinking career began with giving myself permission to drink wine with business associates and clients, and having wine with dinner. Well...you guessed it...1-2 glasses became 5-6....a couple of times a week continued to increase! Before I knew it......drinking was a regular thing...with days of here and there. I divorced my husband in my early 40's, it was a nasty divorce!! Again....not my story any longer.....it is the past! But my drinking problem continued to grow.....I cannot count the number of times that I made a complete ass out of myself.....embarrased myself and others and destroyed relationships and yes, definitely hurt my career! For 15 years drinking was controlling my life, my thoughts, my emotions.....the last year I drank, I drank every night...passing out most nights.......I was depressed and horribly self centered.....I live in all "My Stories"....I finally read a book about letting go of our stories that made sense! I began to do the work of releasing but, it came to me one night that I also had to stop drinking....I would never be able to get out of the horrible depression and sense of helplessness and despair as long as I drank........through searching the internet......I landed at MWO!! WOW!! During the first couple of months, I still drank, but greatly reduced my drinking...after a couple of false starts I was finally finished with making excuses and "trying" and read the book and just made the comittment......created my plan and stopped drinking in January 2008!!

I found the no-nonsense people here that were serious about sobriety and I stuck like glue to them! It worked!! It was one of the hardest things I have ever done....but here I am sober and Happy to be a Non-drinker!

I am myself sober.....I am very happy to be me! Yep! I am an intellectual....a geek of sorts, I enjoy my alone time......I also enjoy time with my husband and family. They finally trust me again.....they no longer worry if I will get drunk and ruin an evening!

I want to continue to grow as a person....knowlege, creativity, love, compassion. I want to share my joy of life and my talents. I am off to a good start, but have a long ways to go.

I love all the extra time that I have now!! I spend time in the evenings....reading, spending quality time with friends and loved ones.....working...yes, working!

I love waking up and feeling good! No regrets to deal with! And loosing all the alcohol induced anxiety!!

So here's my start to this terrific new thread.....I look forward to sharing with everyone!!

[Beck]

30 days and beyond

Hi everyone,

I started drinking at 13 - not often at that age but enough to make me seek out drinks when I was older. I binge drank in high school - blacking out sometimes at parties. I did my first 6 month AF stint at 16 and my drinking tapered off after that. In college I also binge drank - really did that until about 24. I got married and had kids and during a 10 year period, I probably drank (usually to drunkeness) about twice a year and I never even thought about drinking any other time. About 8 or 9 years ago when I was living in Europe and not working, I started drinking in the day socially with friends. This turned into drinking alone - anytime I wanted to - but usually in the day before the kids came home from school. About 4 years ago, we moved from England to Italy and I got a job. I thought GREAT. My life is taking a positive turn and I will stop drinking now. Instead, I started drinking in the evenings before I even changed clothes. I tried to quit or at least take a long break during the last 9 years. I joined MWO in Feb 2008 with the intention of modding and went nearly 7 months AF. Around Labor Day I thought I would try modding - that lasted 3 days before I decided that it wasn't working! I have been AF for these past 5 months. A good MWO friend of mine calls it my AF year minus "the lesson".

I have 4 daughters ages 16, (almost) 14, 12 and 8. They will not grow up with an actively alcoholic mother.

Heavenly and LVT, I used to plan my time with my kids around AL. My life was so limited and I was afriad there would be an emergency because I was fairly useless by 7 pm nearly every night.

[IAD]

30 days and beyond

Hay Heaven, You know I am serious about sobriety.....sober for 5 years before I fell again. I know the grip of alcohol,,,,let no one think that they're free from alcohol because of the amount of time they have'nt drank. Booze, has a long memory on Alcoholics. The sickness begins anew once you take that little drink again. IAD.

[Heavenly]

30 days and beyond

Thanks everyone, lets keep the support going. As IAD says it's 'that little drink again' that we take that can be our downfall from years of sobriety.
I agree I am never far from crossing the line and although I am somewhat more relaxed about seeing or smelling alcohol now, at times in the past I have had my wobbles. I don't want to cross the line back into alcoholism and drunkeness.

We should be positive here and any of us that is having stress after long term sobriety can get help from those of us that are still travelling and from those of us that were travelling, stopped for a drink and then started travelling again.
Maybe they will tell us the pitfalls and what to look out for and avoid.

Thanks

[Guitarista]

30 days and beyond

Greetings everyone, and great idea to start such a thread Heavenly, thank you. I'm going great guns here, and really want to see what i can do, as the non drinking me. I am actually very interested to see what i come up with, where i go etc.......Feel the power, and best wishes all.............G.

[A Work in Progress]

30 days and beyond

Heavenly I am SO glad you started this thread! This, along with the daily AF thread, will give me the kind of ongoing support I believe I need to maintain a strong, healthy mind-set about my relationship with alcohol.

Like many of us here, I have contemplated leaving MWO, and have left for short periods of time, because of reasons I won't go into right now... let's just say that diversity (all kinds of diversity) can be a good thing, and living within a diverse community is also very challenging, is that not true?

But I don't want to leave MWO. I know that a lot of very good support, caring, and information are given and received here, every day.

I'm too tired from house re-habbing and traveling to add anything of much substance right now, but I plan to be a regular on this thread.

[july232007]

30 days and beyond

Heavenly,

I echo the sentiment that your post suggests. That there is a place for continuing growth and satisfaction at a life well lived after 30 days+ AF. I am committed to remaining AF and like the company.

July

[KateH1]

30 days and beyond

I love that expression, July....."A Life Well Lived"....what terrific words to live by! I know that without Alcohol in my life, for the first time, in many years, I actually and living life!!

[tlrgs]

30 days and beyond

yes for me its all about ways to stay sober .. im almost 1 year 6 months and you have no idea how much i would like to just throw the towel in and just say fuck it .. but i dont and has nothing to do with peer pressure and that guy is drinking .. its all me the way i think about it sometimes.. i miss the numb .. in alot of way i dont want to feel anymore.. but i have deeper issue and this is alot of work to stay sober .. its not as easy as you would think .. and i have heard things as tough love ,fuck that never work for me just because when you drive everyone away with your drinking you know who your friends are then and who will truely be there for you ...so when you ask a question why cant you do it..
it because either you are not ready to do it for yourself and commit to or you just dont give a fuck about you and your family ,gf ect.. and as for now im commited to staying sober ..as the saying goes always one day at a time and the fact is ..that im doing this for on one ..but me when it all comes down to it and just know it does get better.. i have change in many ways.. but im still the same old roger and im an alcoholic , loving ,compassionnet person and just add al and instand asshole ..
just me being truthful

[MissDoodleBug]

30 days and beyond

Thanks for starting this thread! I definitely had some of the same feelings that Kate and WIP and others expressed. I agree that we have to make a concerted effort and attack this problem with all the resources and strength we can muster.

That includes, for me, at six weeks AF, using books and supplements and hypnosis and meditation and yoga and brainwashing myself on a daily basis!

That's a lot of effort and I know many abstainers do the same. So, yes, it can be a little frustrating to see people who (comparatively) seem to be less serious about the problem. But, one day when these folks have had enough of the stress of moderation (and I know from experience that it is more stressful to agonize over when and how much to drink than to quit completely) I hope some will follow this path and decide to abstain. It feels so good!

Anyway, I just stay out of the moderators sections, it would be very bad for me at this point in my journey.

Glad we can all be here for each other. And if anyone tells me it is okay to slip, I am gonna get so madatchoo, lol! I am so happy and grateful to be sober and healthy, slipping is not an option!

Love,

Doodlebug

Happily Alcohol Free since December 15, 2008!
Happily Smoke Free since July, 2007!

[Heavenly]

30 days and beyond

hey Miss Doodlebug (love your name by the way) ... If anyone on this thread says it's "fine" or "ok" to slip, they will be walking round with my cyber-boot print on their 'bum' !! LOL. Welcome to the thread and we look forward to your support.

[johnnyh]

30 days and beyond

Hey everyone, This is a great thread and I'll definately stop by here on a regular basis. I started drinking in my teenage years and developed it into a fully fledged habit and addicion over the past couple of years. I've been sober now for almost 2 months (56 days and counting...). And am greatful for it. I definately don't ever want to go back to drinking. Moderation is not an option for me. Abstinence is.

Glad to be on board!!