WHO DID YOU LEAVE BEHIND?

[Lemonhead]

Here's the tough question. Who did you leave behind? A spouse, parent or child? A career? A neighborhood? How did you first take responsibility for your sobriety and then let go of the triggers?

[Cinders]

WHO DID YOU LEAVE BEHIND?

In my case, Lemonhead, I hope I don't have to leave anyone behind.

All I have is my family, my career and my friends here.

I am quitting so I don't lose any of that.

Cindi

[veritas]

WHO DID YOU LEAVE BEHIND?

I am fortunate in that I have not left any people behind. I did however make stupid financial decisions that left my savings behind. I lost everything financialy (including my house) and my career took a dive. I have relapsed recently and am picking myself again, but since going AF and managing for over 90 days, my finance, career and energy have started to pick up in a most heartening way. Not only am I making better decisions, but I have more energy.

[Sweaty Betty]

WHO DID YOU LEAVE BEHIND?

Lemonhead,

I think its quite possible that your triggers will always be there. For me I had to learn to deal with them in a different way (and am still learning!). At first it was really hard to be in a social situation without AL, but I was lucky enough not to have anyone trying to persuade me to drink - most of my friends are non-drinkers and always have been. There are others on the board who have 'given up' friendships that can't be sustained without AL.

There is obviously someone or something that you are worried about dealing with AF, do you want to be more specific? You might be able to get more direct advice if you do.

Take Care

Bets
x

[Starlight Impress Forever]

WHO DID YOU LEAVE BEHIND?

I left my alkie ex behind, the same ex who told me to my face how he was NOT an alcoholic as he merely had a dependency..........in his dreams!!!!

To quit drink, I had to quit him first.......was the way forward for me.........no regrets. :H

Star x

[Sunbeam]

WHO DID YOU LEAVE BEHIND?

I left part of my relationship with my husband behind. It's different now, will be better over time but we are still adjusting.

[mario]

WHO DID YOU LEAVE BEHIND?

I left my whole past life behind and now have started on my new life,starting with myself and moving slowly forward

[hippie37]

WHO DID YOU LEAVE BEHIND?

The only way I could take responsibility for my addiction was to look at my part and the role I played as an addict. I had abused, manipulated, lied, stole, emotionally raped and blackmailed people and the ONLY way to take responsibility for those was to 'own' my part in it. NOT rationalize or try and justify my behaviour; but actually see it for what it really was and accept that. I didn't want to at the best of times, believe me, as some of the things I've done I'm completely ashamed of. I move forward today with a conscience and although it's not completely clear at present I've got some peace of mind knowing I'm not a bad person.

I think too many people fall into the trap of leaving their old self behind and not getting in touch with that alcoholic/addict, which is always going to be a part of who we are. Phil the addict is the person I have to manage in my daily life so I don't go out and drink, but to just wash my hands of him and move on is just like putting a plaster over the wound for me. Without any air to breath I'm just ignoring the problem and inside I'm suffocating which will eventually lead me back to the bottle. I accept Phil the addict today and don't hide from him or run away from him.

So in all honesty I've left nothing behind. I've just accepted me for who I am and what I've done and live my life to the best of my ability today. Acceptance is definitely the key for me to a happy future.

Peace and Love
Phil
xx

[Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)]

WHO DID YOU LEAVE BEHIND?

Execllent post Phill, I agree 100%. I think making peace with our past and accepting it, warts and all for what it is, is paramount to succeeding on our journey.

[Heavenly]

WHO DID YOU LEAVE BEHIND?

All good posts and I take a bit or a lot from all of them .... what I left behind was a damned nasty drunk ..... and became a sober person !!!! Nice or nasty ? who knows ... but sober ....