Accepting our feelings

[mario]

Why do we struggle so with our feelings? Why do we work so hard to deny our emotions,especially concerning other people? They are only feelings !
In the course of a day we may deny we feel frustrated in reaction to some one who is selling us a service.
We may deny that we feel frustrated,angry, or hurt in reaction to a friend
We may deny feelings of anger,toward our children
We may deny a whole range of feelings to our spouse or the person with whom were in a love relationship
We may deny feelings provoked by people we work for,or by the people who work for us.
Sometimes the feelings are a direct reaction to others,
Sometimes people trigger something deeper- an old sadness or frustration
Regardless of the source of our feelings,they are still our feelings,we own them,and acceptance is often all that is necessary to make them go away.
We dont have to let our feelings control our behavior.We dont have to act on each feeling that passes through us,We do not need to indulge in inappropriate behaviour
It does help to talk about our feelings with someone we trust,sometimes we need to bring our feelings to the person who is triggering them,That can breed intimacy and closeness,But the most important person we need to tell is ourselves,If we allow our feelings to pass through us,accept them and release them,We shall know what to do next,remember that feelings are an important part of your life,be open to your feelings in family life,in friendship,in love and at work,feel your feelings without judgeing yourself.

[one2many]

Accepting our feelings

Great post Mario and something I really needed to read today........things are quite horrible at home at the moment and I need to get it sorted.

Thanks again Mario xxx

[mario]

Accepting our feelings

same here oney my head is all over the place with emotions ,but soldier on we must

[startingover]

Accepting our feelings

I think accepting our feelings is probably the hardest part of sobriety. Thats probably why we drank in the first place...
Those are very wise words Mario, thank you for posting.
Oney, I am so sorry you are going through the mill right now....

[lilmea]

Accepting our feelings

same here oney my head is all over the place with emotions ,but soldier on we must

So true, Mario, soldier on we must. Sometimes, it's simple taking it minute by minute, putting one foot in front of the other. Just as long as I make it to the end of the day af.

Thanks for this great post. As usual, always inspiring.

[KateH1]

Accepting our feelings

Mario, You write so beautifuly and you always get to the heart of it.

The first step in our journey is to stop drinking.......but, the second and most important step to long term sobriety is learning to Live differently and that truly does begin with how we deal with our feelings without numbing out. This is where the true work is.

xx Kate

[hippie37]

Accepting our feelings

I think accepting our feelings is probably the hardest part of sobriety. That's probably why we drank in the first place...

No 'probably' about it in my eyes. DEFINITELY

Thanks for the post Mario. Like Oney I have had a lot going on too and today I talked to someone without analyzing the hell out of things and got some peace of mind. It's good to talk!!

Love and Light
Phil
xx

[mario]

Accepting our feelings

At this time this is so appropriate for me

:H i must start reading what i write :H

[Minnie]

Accepting our feelings

mario;742946 wrote: At this time this is so appropriate for me

:H i must start reading what i write :H

It obviously came from the heart Mario

[Heavenly]

Accepting our feelings

I found the following passage from a long article summed it up for me, while they are discussing the grief of death, it can be applied to the loss of anything really.... even alcohol .... and on the flip side of the coin the repressed feelings we have can emerge and express themselves in the form of alcohol abuse, most but not all, people usually have some kind of background rage, emotion, abuse that raises it's ugly head in addiction of one kind or another ....


''What is crucial is how we deal with these feelings of loss. We can avoid our emotions, treating them as if they don’t exist. We can tell people, even ourselves, that we are "just fine." But as the advertisement jingle goes, you can "pay me now, or pay me later." Stuffed away feelings always catch up with us. People burst forth in waves of emotion, often through tears or fits of rage. Some of us become "human battering rams," taking out our anger and aggression on anyone who gets in the way, including care providers, physicians, educators, even family and close relatives, the very people who can best support us in our struggles.''


Reference: Welcome to the Fathers Network

[scrubbly]

Accepting our feelings

mario;741519 wrote: acceptance is often all that is necessary to make {bad feelings} go away....We dont have to act on each feeling that passes through us....feel your feelings without judgeing yourself.

Mario, these three phrases from your post are ABSOLUTE GEMS.

PERFECT PEARLS.

Thank you for these today. They became my morning meditation points and I appreciate your putting them out there for us.

:l

[KateH1]

Accepting our feelings

Heavenly, You bring out a very important point in regards to dealing with feelings rather than stuffing them. In my experience, in the past stuffing feelings lead to all that you write about in the post above. I have also observed the same things happening with family members and friends. Working through those memories and emotions is the only way to long term sobriety and happiness. We cannot fool ourselves that a chemical solution, be it drugs legal or not, or alcohol will resolve any of these deep seated issues.

I am happy to report, that over the past nearly two years of sobriety, I have actively and deliberately worked through many of what I formerly stuffed. It is so liberating!

[irish eyes]

Accepting our feelings

Mario, thanks for a very insightful post. Yep, I know today that my feelings are neither right or wrong but they are important to me and may be uncomfortable but that doesnt make them bad or I dont need to act on them. With a change of attitude I have choices what to do with my feelings and I realise anything can be used for my good if I allow it. I guess that is why I was given an active imagination to use it....

[Starlight Impress Forever]

Accepting our feelings

My sentiments entirely, mario. Thank you.

Star x

[clare]

Accepting our feelings

omg thus this relate to me today