Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

To watch loneliness vanish

Collapse
X
Collapse
 
  • Page of 1
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
Previous template Next
    #1

    To watch loneliness vanish

    Almost without exception, alcoholics are tortured by loneliness.
    Even before our drinking got bad and people began to cut us off,nearly all of us suffered the feeling that we didn't quite belong.
    Either we were shy,and dared not draw near others or we were noisy good fellows constantly craving attention and companionship,but rarely getting it,There was always that mysterious barrier we could neither surmount nor understand,that was another reason we loved alcohol so well,but even bacchus betrayed us,We were finally struck down and left in terrified isolation,
    Life can take on a new meaning when your alcohol free,even here to watch people recover,to see them help others,to watch loneliness vanish,to see a community grow around you,to have real friends--this is an experience not to be missed


    :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

    Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
    I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

    This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.
    Tags: None
    #2
    To watch loneliness vanish

    This is so true Mario.
    I have always felt as if I am on the outside looking in in some ways.
    I think its one of the reasons I drank in the first place, when I was young I was quite sickly and didnt really learn how to socialise in the formative years when beginning school etc. So naturally my confidence was at a low ebb.
    Being sober is giving me the ability to fit in properly, not in some false bravado way, but a genuine truthful way.
    I love it!
    Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
    Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

    Comment

      #3
      To watch loneliness vanish

      I agree with you. I am and have been tortured by extreme loneliness all my life. Especially now that my kids are grown and gone and I live in the country where I have no friends or family, just a husband who is an alcoholic and can't stand the thought of touching me. I wish I could see a future without loneliness, but drunk or sober, it's just not there. Thanks for that post though.
      I'm not what I should be, I'm not what I could be. I'm definetly not who I want to be,
      but I'm sure not who I used to be!

      There is no pit so deep that God's love is not deeper still.

      "I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO STRENGTHENS ME." Phil 4:13

      Comment

        #4
        To watch loneliness vanish

        mario, I just wanted to tell you :thanks:! For all your insight, that you give to us all, through your post and threads. runningwind
        mario;812582 wrote:
        Almost without exception, alcoholics are tortured by loneliness.
        Even before our drinking got bad and people began to cut us off,nearly all of us suffered the feeling that we didn't quite belong.
        Either we were shy,and dared not draw near others or we were noisy good fellows constantly craving attention and companionship,but rarely getting it,There was always that mysterious barrier we could neither surmount nor understand,that was another reason we loved alcohol so well,but even bacchus betrayed us,We were finally struck down and left in terrified isolation,
        Life can take on a new meaning when your alcohol free,even here to watch people recover,to see them help others,to watch loneliness vanish,to see a community grow around you,to have real friends--this is an experience not to be missed
        The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes of mind. William James (1842-1910)

        Comment

          #5
          To watch loneliness vanish

          Another lovely post and i agree with runningwind,your posts are very insightfull,Thanks for sticking around.

          Comment

            #6
            To watch loneliness vanish

            a sense of belonging

            is achieved through sobriety. it's not earned, it just happens. it is revealed.

            perhaps we sense a belonging amongst our fellow sufferers at first, then we move out beyond that to find that the world is not a primarily malevolent place.

            Comment

              #7
              To watch loneliness vanish

              Well put, Mario, and certainly true for me, too. I've been much more aware of my loneliness since giving up alcohol completely just 28 days ago. I'm more aware of all my feelings. But I think loneliness is the hardest. Maybe after a little more time of not hiding behind a buzz, I'll be able to find a way to reach out more.

              Sick of Being Sick, Your post made me so sad for you. Stay connected here, and the time may come when you can connect more elsewhere. :l
              "When she enjoyed her drinking she couldn't control it, and when she controlled it, she couldn't enjoy it." (from The Big Book)

              Comment

                #8
                To watch loneliness vanish

                Cross-posted with you, smileydude, and you put it much more eloquently than I did!
                "When she enjoyed her drinking she couldn't control it, and when she controlled it, she couldn't enjoy it." (from The Big Book)

                Comment

                  #9
                  To watch loneliness vanish

                  Great Post mario,
                  It funny few weeks ago my manager call me in the office for my review and we was just talking about my work which he had no problems with but he did say to me you are SHY:shocked: well i looked at him and said in what way....well he said when he first started working at our place he said he notice it took me a long time for me to look him in the eyes and say hello and he notice when ever am walking i have my head down and eyes are looking at the floor or side ways not in front of me.......was i surprise i knew that i was shy but i not realise (other people notice i was) i walk with my head down this explains why when i was a child i use to walk into so many lamp post....... i cant change who i am that is me, but i can improve by walking with my head up......loneliness i have to be careful with this one as well i can easliy isolate myself away in my bedroom (i dont have to be tired) which is not health at all but im learning now not to do this as well. Being sober is learning about the natural me.
                  Formerly known as Teardrop:l
                  sober dry since 11th Jan '2010' relapse/slip on 23/7/13 working in progress ! Sober date 25/7/13 ( True learning has often followed an eclipse, a time of darkness, but with each cycle of my recovery, the light grows stronger and my vision is clearer. (AA)
                  my desire to avoid hitting bottom again was more powerful then my desire to drink !

                  Comment

                    #10
                    To watch loneliness vanish

                    good morning everyone,interesting post mario and great comments,i have to say i dont beleive i was lonely,but shy,i was , loud at times,even when i write now,ive had to lern to hold back,at times,the contempt to lash out,trying to grasp the new understanding of life in sobriety,is very overwhelming,remember as you grew up,from a toddler and played with the child next door,girl or boy,the feelings within yourself,that they were different,[in so many ways],no one tot us how to feel,image was the way to survive,to impress all around us,but ourselves,i beleive were all lerning all over again,amagine if someone told you years ago,you'd be talking to someone ,somewhere in the world on a electrical machine,about how you abused YOU,with a substance that everyone else said it was ok to use,and the only way to get help is to talk to someone like you that had or have the same feelings,i no what i would of said,they belong in a nut house,life is a struggle,why make it harder on yourself,thanx for being here for me folks gyco

                    Comment

                      #11
                      To watch loneliness vanish

                      Hello and thank you for you post. It really hit the nail on the head for me. I feel like I should not post here since I am not a long term abstainer, but that is my goal. I read here often and find some of the best insights from the people on this forum. I really appreciate all of you and Thank you.

                      I totally agree with what you said Mario. Loneliness has been my issue for decades, since high school I've never fit it in someway or other. After my third move to yet another city, I'm not finding it easier to beat the loneliness without trying to erase it with AL. It's actually harder to make friends because my kids are older and I don't have them as a catalyst for making connections. I join groups here and there but there are no true connections. It seems like if feel sick, tired, guilty, ashamed, afraid, etc when I'm drinking.... but I don't feel lonely or regretful about my life for the last 20 years, which is more bearable?

                      I think I have to have faith that eventually my emotions will turn around and I will feel better. I need to realize that I have zero chance of things changing if I drink and my only chance for things to turn around is to give absitinance a long term shot

                      Comment

                        #12
                        To watch loneliness vanish

                        Mario..another great post. I am becoming a fan.
                        My drinking started so I could be social and of course over time had just the opposite effect. The last 3 years I've actually become a self imposed prisoner of my home.

                        As I rack up more AF days, my health is improving and my desire to join the world.
                        I live in a new city, work from home and have little chance of making friends, but just getting out..walking in the park, anything, is going to help free myself from this isolation I've imposed on myself in the past so I could pursue my drinking in privacy.

                        Keep up the great posts!

                        Comment

                        Previous template Next
                        Working...
                        X