Most of my resentments stem from old fears. When I find I have a resentment it's usually because someone has 'pushed my buttons'. This usually taps straight into old familiar feelings of not being good enough, of being judged, of being weak, of not being loved etc. etc. All those horrible feelings I used to get that basically said "I don't belong".
It's kind of like having a load of nerve endings and each one is a path to some incident from my past that when people push those buttons It brings about a feeling I associate with that. I know I can't cut out all the nerve endings because I'll end up not feeling anything at all. I Might as well take a load of prozac and have done with it and just numb my feelings. That's no way to live though. For me personally I need to take action with a resentment and talk to someone immediately about it before it gets way out of hand up there in my head!!. I can completely catastrophize things in a matter of minutes. I will say though after 2 years being sober those buttons may still get pushed just as hard as they did when I was drinking. I just don't react as much anymore because the wiring of my nerves is starting to change.
Hope that makes sense!
Many Blessings
Phil
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