I did have my big honkin' sirloin last night, with a baked potato, and a salad of raw carrots, broccoli, and cauliflower. Well, actually I cut the steak in half, so it ended up being about 11oz, and cut the rest up into little bits for later use.
I wrote about a book I got in the "What We're Reading" section. I always get pretty excited when I think I have found a new powerful way of increasing my strength, will, and commitment to sobriety. It's like I have found a new gun and cache of ammo to blast drinking Neil with.
I know deep down, that drinking Neil is incredibly sly, crafty, manipulative, and persuasive. I fear him like a enraged grizzly bear. I still have much work to do, to get to the core of my fears and anxieties. I fear becoming like a Mel Gibson, or Robin Williams and one day just falling apart after years of being abstinent. I do think that those guys never did address core issues of the psyche, and never came to a resolve with their own "drinking Mel", and "drinking Robin". Maybe they used some other system, and to read how they crashed and burned after years is like watching a horror movie.
Some of you may have seen that movie, "In the Mouth of Madness". It always sticks in my mind, about dealing with the deep down drinking monster that is in many of us. Those of us who know that moderation will never, ever be a possibility. It's the same monster that got Mel and Robin I bet. Even after five or ten years, or whatever. The monster says to us, "Oh yea, you have got many years of sobriety now, and all the bad stuff is healed up and gone!" "You can have just a couple and let it go at that!"
Ummm. Nope, nada, nil. Went four years without a cigarette, back when I was in my early 30's, and it only took one. Just one. Just one, and I was off and running back to a carton a week land. So there it is. The evidence that the monster must be dealt with, and not fed in any way,shape, form, or fashion.
Look for more on stretching in the near future in Holistic Healing. Be well.
Neil
Comment