Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Shifting Gears...

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    Shifting Gears...

    Shifting Gears

    I have been going through another round of changes again here in the last several days. Even at a year and 3 weeks AF, I still have my ?crisis? points. I don?t know what brought this last one on, but I am flowing out of it now, and feel compelled to write a little something about it.

    It may have to do with a new technique I recently started called Emotional Freedom Technique or EFT for short. Another member, USAnne wrote that it was a great help to her. It looked quite interesting, and I read through the training manual on it. It said that it worked best on specific events remembered, and I had a boatload of them. Key events in my past life, remembered as far back as 3 years old, which I knew were lodged in my psyche as traumas.

    I hammered away on about 5 specific events all at one time, and something happened, most upsetting. It seemed as if I did too much at one time, and it flipped me out something fierce. I was awake for 30 hours I think, because even with supplements, I could not sleep one wink that night. A flood of emotional energy pent up for years, came out of me like a tornado of grief, despair, and anger. (Note to xtexan: Try to take them one at a time in the future!)

    So now I am feeling better, on a new level of peace and calm after that storm. One I have not known in quite some time. The technique seems to be very powerful, (I?ll say!), if it is focused on specific key events.

    Anyway, the point of this is, that I think the longer you go into sobriety, and the further you explore yourself, and resolve issues, you shift gears. This is a good thing.

    Just like in a car, you go so far in one gear, and the engine gets past it?s designed power peak. Then, because you now have momentum, the transmission up-shifts, and your engine slows back down, but you are going the same speed. Now, you can go even faster.

    Getting sober to me is a lot like that. I have a theory, that maybe some folks have a relapse, because they never ?shift gears?. By the way, in this case, we are dealing with a manual shift transmission. You have to consciously reach down, push in the clutch to free the engine for a bit, pull and push the shifter to the next gear, and then let the clutch back out again. It?s a metaphor I know, but for me, this is the second go-around I think. I went from first to second I believe back in September when I first joined this forum.

    The last couple of weeks have seemed like I was going from second to third. I feel different, more stable, calm, and my engine is revved back down again. How fast can we go? I think that depends how healthy we are. The exercise has its place there. The meditation has its place there. Those are the things that tune the engine. How many speeds does my transmission have? Don?t know, but it will be interesting to find out!!

    Be well.

    Neil

    #2
    Shifting Gears...

    Hi Neil,

    I have been seeing an EFT therapist for a couple of months but not practicing it at home. I can say, however, that during the middle of one of my sessions the most bizarre thing happened. This one particular event in my childhood involving my asshole brothers that I had completely forgotten about came to the surface, completely out of the blue, and I immediately burst into tears. I could actually feel how I felt when it happened to me as a child; as if I had turned into a 4-year-old right there in her office. I was embarrassed sitting in my therapist's office but she was wonderful and helped walk and talk me through it. It sure clarified why I HATE one of my brothers so incredibly much. Aside from that though I have not felt the full effect from EFT like I had hoped. Guess I will try it again and this time be more consistent and do it at home as well.

    I like your analogy and, as usual, you have given me food for thought. Thanks! And I am glad you are back in a stronger place than earlier.
    I'm really easy to get along with once people learn to worship me

    Comment


      #3
      Shifting Gears...

      Neil,
      Its like you are this kid.. he has awoken and is trying to make up for lost time.. so instead of doing one thing.. no no.. that would be too easy.. its 5 things!!!!!!!!!!!!! Luckily you have the constitution to survive this overload and your decision to stay sober is rock solid.

      Can you hear your mother figure saying... take care neil..

      The little I"ve done with EFT I have found too confronting. I require a softer approach. I do use it, but only occasionally and on very vey specific things... but I know Anne uses it and is a real convert to it.

      And I totally agree about relapse. I have fought with myself in thinking that I've arrived.. I'm like a little girl wanting my happily ever after.. and I have to bloody well grow up and let go of that and enjoy the journey that I have rather than live in a fantasy land. If I dont continue to work through my journey I'll stagnate and stagnation was what brought me here and I DONT WANT TO GO BACK THERE.

      I so respect your writing about this stuff also. I've found it very hard to share some of my continuing journey because I have (mistakenly, probably) thought that people who are newer to sobriety will think that it does not get easier and I'd hate to put them off starting their journey... so thanks.

      And to you also.. be well.
      Brigid

      Comment


        #4
        Shifting Gears...

        Hello All
        I had never heard of EFT before. Ishall look into it. It sounds very interesting.

        Comment


          #5
          Shifting Gears...

          Thanks Niel. I saw USAnne's post about EFl but didn't follow up on checking it out. Will do. I'm putting it on my "list"... first I've got to get into the Genius Stretching book. What a powerful intro he describes as the victem of a drunk driver who hit him at 40mph after slowing down from about 70. Just gotta thank the universe that I'm seeing the light before I inflicted anything so traumatic on some unsuspecting soul.

          Appreciate your honesty and candor. Vrrm-vrrm.

          Olly

          Comment


            #6
            Shifting Gears...

            I really like your metaphor, Neil. I can feel myself revving up and up sometimes and I wonder how long it's going to last. I know sobriety (and life in general) can't go on like that indefinitely.

            And then, like you Brigid, I start imagining some plateau of happiness and well being, where I can level off and spend the rest of my life. Sounds lovely in a way, but I know it's not real. And then when I stop to think about it, it also sounds kind of boring.

            So the idea that there's always forward momentum, with different speeds, different RPM's, where I can sometimes feel like I'm working hard and other times feel restful is appealing and (perhaps) realistic.

            Mike
            "Few things are impossible to diligence and skill. Great works are performed not by strength, but perseverance." -- Samuel Johnson (1709 - 1784)

            Comment

            Working...
            X