It?s a Friday night a typical after-work drinks with your colleagues...
It?s a date and you are out with a new person going to dinner or a bar...
It?s a gathering after a conference or a meeting...
You want to make a good impression, however, you don?t drink. There are two alternatives a) to lie b) to tell the truth.
I am sure this is a common question but how do you respond to ?How come you are not having a drink?? I usually say that I am driving or I need to get up early the following morning but this is only a temporary fix. People really do take it personally and I found that this is one of the biggest reasons for my relapses in the past.
Last time I quit alcohol for almost 6 months and went on holiday to see my parents, who are now retired in Spain. It was a celebration, people were invited and everyone commented to my father about me not drinking. He seemed insulted as it was a gathering at his house and it seems to be viewed in the same way as someone not eating your cooking.
Drinking just seems to be so widespread that it?s not even considered to be a problem. Many people around me drink 3-4 times a week and I don?t mean just a glass of wine. We even have a name for Thursdays (Thirsty Thursday) and in my previous job it was even accepted to be in late on Fridays as everyone was boozing the previous night, often together. But if you ask any of them whether they have a problem you will never hear a yes. So is being an alcoholic an acceptable way of life, at least in Britain? If so how do you remain friends or get through to these people who are often your friends: successful, respectable and great people when you quit drinking. They take it so very, very personal and I found reasoning with them a total FAIL. So is lying the only option left?
ALLAN K.
It?s a date and you are out with a new person going to dinner or a bar...
It?s a gathering after a conference or a meeting...
You want to make a good impression, however, you don?t drink. There are two alternatives a) to lie b) to tell the truth.
I am sure this is a common question but how do you respond to ?How come you are not having a drink?? I usually say that I am driving or I need to get up early the following morning but this is only a temporary fix. People really do take it personally and I found that this is one of the biggest reasons for my relapses in the past.
Last time I quit alcohol for almost 6 months and went on holiday to see my parents, who are now retired in Spain. It was a celebration, people were invited and everyone commented to my father about me not drinking. He seemed insulted as it was a gathering at his house and it seems to be viewed in the same way as someone not eating your cooking.
Drinking just seems to be so widespread that it?s not even considered to be a problem. Many people around me drink 3-4 times a week and I don?t mean just a glass of wine. We even have a name for Thursdays (Thirsty Thursday) and in my previous job it was even accepted to be in late on Fridays as everyone was boozing the previous night, often together. But if you ask any of them whether they have a problem you will never hear a yes. So is being an alcoholic an acceptable way of life, at least in Britain? If so how do you remain friends or get through to these people who are often your friends: successful, respectable and great people when you quit drinking. They take it so very, very personal and I found reasoning with them a total FAIL. So is lying the only option left?
ALLAN K.
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