Today is day 50 - does this qualify me as a long term abber??
Boredom is a good description - for me, it's just lonliness. I can't believe how much of my life revolved around booze before this. I can't believe how much of my husband's does. We go out to eat lunch (once in a while) or go shop for something and he can't wait to drop me off so that he can go to the bar. Or, run an errand and come back two hours later. I stopped once and drank club soda - I had nothing to say, and they had nothing to say to me. These are people that I used to think were my friends. I guess if I'm not loud, obnoxious and drunk, we have nothing in common.
My true friends, the ones who have a grip on booze, have families and lives, so I can't intrude on them on the weekend. I have plenty I have to do, but the resentment is really starting to build up. I work out of my house and go days sometimes without seeing people. I also work part time outside of the house, and I'm tired. I work every Saturday and Sunday morning. I try to find things to do, but sometimes, I'm just too damn tired and there is really nothing going on that a "married/single" can do. It would really be nice to have something to look forward to. I'm thinking about backing off my other part time job, but then it would be more time just sitting alone watching yet another movie.
I still don't want a drink - I know the consequences. I just need to put my "thinking cap" on and get more creative with my time.
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