100 Day Club members/Maintenance Thread

[Myluck]

Cherokee - I loved this "God I wish all AL just vanish off the planet!" - this is my mish as well. This would be great.

[Pavati]

Hi,

Rox - Yikes, and thanks for sharing that. Really, really important not to get complacent with this thing.

Chero - I don't really have experience, but what I have read says that you can only lead by example, and by talking about what sobriety has done for you. I guess some people have full blown interventions that work for some people, but I'm not sure you can get sober unless you are ready (or forced into being ready). That sounds stressful!

I'm off to bed. I feel like I say that a lot around here, as I am always posting just before bed.

Night.
Pav

[Samstone]

No Sam she doesn't and its really not a normal behavior for her. That is why it stands out so much. She is normally just an occasional drinker but in the last month she is drinking way more than normal. I am hoping that as things get better she will taper back to normal.

Chero
does she acknowledge in a positive way of your direction?, if so you may be able, in a friendly way, tell her your experience, not preachy or directed at her but talking about yourself and all the positives that have come from it. Kinda like what Pav is talking about, leading by example. Something may come of it. Usually folks tend to get very defensive when directed at them.

The most important thing though is not to get distracted by the situation but to remain happy in your decision. I am learning the hard lesson of staying out of the way with my "children" who are in their 20's and 30's. Sometimes I don't do so well with it.
Sam

[sunshine_gg]

Harrow to the geriatric ward!

Just finding my way around the boards again... how is everyone!?

[available]

Hi Sunny, i was thinking about you the other day and wondering how you were, i like reading your thread but kind of lost it when things changed. A year for you soon, woo hoo.

Chero, my son who just turned 21 was drinking way too much and this had been going on for awhile, i did not worry as i was drinking, bad mum! Now i have stopped for some time i just started dropping subtle hints about how great i felt, how much money i was saving. just little things on how good i felt af. Then i started to tell him about how drinking snuck up on me over the years and how his uncle and myself started like him, drinking alone, waiting to be paid etc. Everytime he was hungover i told him how great i felt and glad it was him. It took a few months until i told him i didnt want him to be like me in 30 years and that is what would happen, i told him stories from mwo. It wasnt an every day thing that i talked about but i did keep mentioning it. Now he has basically been sober since he turned 21. He has been out with friends and gotten drunk but does not drink alone or daily anymore. We now still talk as i bring up how proud of him i am for doing this and ask how his life has changed. I am so proud of him for doing what i wish someone had tried to do for me all those years ago.

Schizophrenic word salad, i love that!

[Lavande]

Why - we old codgers are doing just fine Sunni - thanks for asking
Don't be a stranger now!!!!

[Cherokeer]

Lava, Pac, Sam,

Good news, today I spoke with my daughter about her drinking and how it's okay to feel sorry for yourself for a short while and have a few days of drinks but its time to suck it up and deal with life. She agreed and said she was done with drinking more than normal.

My kids and everyone I know can't honestly believe I stopped drinking. They are glad and I am too. I drank for the last 6 years, the last 2 years way too much. The last year I started isolating myself from people. I wish I could get my last 2 years back and live them all over again. What a horrible waste of my time. I asked my husband if we really had to have AL at every single family get together, every kayak trip, and every damn night. Granted my husband only drinks 1 maybe 2 beers a night. But its constant. I'd like to try to silently disapprove and steer our get togethers AL free. I don't want to be a crazy zealot but I am a bit tired of being the sober odd one out all the time. I want them to come to the light side with me occasionally.

I know I am the one that has changed not them but I just don't enjoy things like I used to when I was a drinker. I want to do different things now that don't involve AL. I'm just not sure how to transition the family and friends to this new way. Any advice?

[Samstone]

Chero
I know that must be a relief and good that things are pretty open.
Sam

[Lavande]

Chero - time will smooth things out, you'll see
I know we all want to fix everything & everyone immediately when we quit but we just can't do that.
In time you will adjust to being the 'sober one' & the others will adjust in a way that is good for them. I hope that makes sense. Stay positive & stay patient, everything will work out!

[Byrdlady]

Hey all. Thought I'd come over and look for some Pie!
Had a good day of doing nothing! Great to be home! B

[Cherokeer]

I'm jealous Birdie. All my husband and I wanted to do was stay home. We had a wedding today. It was a long affair. Glad to be home. I didn't feel nearly as bad as I did at the wedding we had last month. I sort of had an epiphany tonight. As everyone is dancing and drinking I was sitting at my table and everyone couldn't believe I was not out there dancing. I love to dance and am rather good at it (so I'm told anyway). But I felt very subconscious and did not want to dance. Which is weird for me since I have always danced all my life. I realized I have lost a lot of my confidence.

I drilled down to the root feeling using the 5 why's. It's because I feel self conscious because of the 20 pounds I still have hanging around. Granted I've lost 20 but still need to seriously drop more. So that is my next order of business is to get myself back into great shaped. That is the confident place I want to step off from. I feel like a big snorlax and I look like one too.

[Eloise]

Hey guys!

All is well with me too and I am working again next week, no art though... school vacation. Boy am I ever glad I won't be home alone the next two weeks without kids for art.

Off to the gym now and will be back on here later. Today is going to be a quiet day in the studio for me. Tranquille!

[Eloise]

I'm jealous Birdie. All my husband and I wanted to do was stay home. We had a wedding today. It was a long affair. Glad to be home. I didn't feel nearly as bad as I did at the wedding we had last month. I sort of had an epiphany tonight. As everyone is dancing and drinking I was sitting at my table and everyone couldn't believe I was not out there dancing. I love to dance and am rather good at it (so I'm told anyway). But I felt very subconscious and did not want to dance. Which is weird for me since I have always danced all my life. I realized I have lost a lot of my confidence.

I drilled down to the root feeling using the 5 why's. It's because I feel self conscious because of the 20 pounds I still have hanging around. Granted I've lost 20 but still need to seriously drop more. So that is my next order of business is to get myself back into great shaped. That is the confident place I want to step off from. I feel like a big snorlax and I look like one too.

You are on your way girl, the extra weight will come off. Remember how long it took to put it on? Longer for it to come off.
Get started with a gym routine, while you patiently wait for it to dribble off at least you will feel good and active.
Since I stopped with the sugar sweats I feel like I am less puffy. I am very, very slowly loosing weight but the puff is vanishing... not sure why? I am also sleeping a lot better.
Remember to eat lots of fruits and veggies, even if it takes a while they help you to feel better in your mind too.
xx

[Sunbeam]

Hi Friends,
I'm still checking in daily, but the site will only let me log in on my desktop computer, so I'm not posting much. Sunday afternoon used to be my heavy drinking time, so it is a joy to be looking at another AF day in my wonderful life.

[Myluck]

Hi everybody. I also check very often . This site is great support to me. I celebrate 1 year today and my hat goes off to all my supporters here (and some even became my friends). Thank you all for support and belief. I am going to yoga of course this morning. This feels like a good beginning of another AF year.