I finish my training class on Thursday, I am so excited to get to go home. Everyone has been odrinking and having on big party here, I have had no major problems, and no major urge to join them. Day 73 today. I have a doctors appointment on monday, it will be my first appointment since telling my doctor I have a drinking problem, and I am excited to go in there and tell her I was able to quit drinking with success so far!!
I have noticed the longer I remain abs, the easier it gets. There are still little moments where you "remember" what it was like and want it, but it is for a split second, and much easier to control.
Now, the days have added up to larger numbers compared to my first couple of weeks. I can say things like "when I hit 90 days" because I know I will. And that is a good feeling. I think about it far less than i did my first few weeks, I have learned new habits, new routines.
I quit smoking, and quit drinking, 73 days ago, and so far, have touched neither, not even once. Before this period of abstinence, my self confidence was okay, but it could be rocked easily, now, I feel like I can handle so much more. I am able to handle situations so much better. Before I quit drinking, I thought about what I would do if something bad happened, you know, someone dies, a breakup, anything bad along those lines, how would I handle that and not turn back to an excuse to drink. I have had so many things come up in the past two months that would have made a good excuse to open a bottle before, but now I know that it is not a way to handle a problem. I just accept that life happens, and before I drank, i was a able to cope with things, so I just re-learned that.
I am enjoying life so much more. I love waking up without the shame. I love knowing what I did the night before. I love living my life, not wasting my life.
Victoria
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