Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

[Eve11]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

Welcome Getting Better,
I've been having a real struggle with what my rules are and the last couple of weeks I was having a real hard time following my rules. I got advice to go AF for as long as possible and although I tend to only go 5-6 days AF at a time it has helped me to understand and appreciate how nice it feels to not have the hangover and all of the other negative things that go with that.

When I drink I also pay very close attention to how I feel the next day and I actually have discovered with even 1 drink I just don't bounce out of bed the next day energetic like I am on AF days. I have to admit that I DO enjoy a nice cold beer on a week-end day after being outside or a great glass of wine or two on a date evening with hubby. I am hoping I can mod and it can be o.k. but it scared me when I started to see 4 drinks on the drinktracker because I started one night and didn't want to stop.

I also broke my rules of not drinking alone in order to do that so I was pretty disappointed in myself. Switched a few things around for myself and I'm very pleased with my progress this week.

There is a ton of support here so join us and make your way with us as we figure out ours.
Big welcome hugs to you,
Eve11

[DeeBee]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

Well TGIF fellow modders!

Zed, I love our daily Chineese lessons. In South Africa we have 11 offical languages and scores of un-offical ones. It was compulsary for us to learn Afrikaans at school -- altho I sucked at it. My daughter and all the kids today learn 3 languages, English, Afrikaans and Zulu. Zulu is particualy tough to learn as there are alot of clicking noises made with the tounge that aren't pronounced the way they are spelt.
English is generally understood across the country, being the language of business, politics and the media, But it only ranks joint fifth out of 11 as a home language.

Dead-man posture... I'm going to give that a try tonight. I hope my daughter doesn't walk in on me again. Last weekend while I though she was still sleeping I was (trying) to meditate, even had some OM noises going and she woke up thinking there was something wrong with me lol!

Peri, I must ask What is Bratts and Beer -- obviously I get the beer part and I am thinking bratts is some form of meat?
IMHO Planning is what makes the difference between modding sucessfully or not. It's when I don't plan and I find myself in a situation that I haven't thought about that the poo hits the fan. Every day, every post you are sounding stronger Peri -- keep it up!!
Last night hubby and I went for dinner on our own (bliss) and I planned to have only one glass of wine with dinner. Who was it who mentioned a little while ago why do they always have the second glass when one glass is actually enough? Well I am chuffed to say that I had only ONE glass with dinner and there was still some left when my coffee arrived so I didn't finish it.
I have been upset with myself a couple of times this month when I haven't stuck to my modding goals but last night I had to give myself a pat on the back for just how far I'd come. Before MWO I would've drunk 4 glasses before hubby had even got home and then 3 or 4 at dinner and then still carried on drinking when we got home.

"My 2.5 months AF simply did not teach me how to moderate. I have only learned this skill through trial and error."
Wow Sun, that has really hit the nail on the head for me!! Well said. As long as we are aware of why we drink and when so as to make sure we don't slip back into our old habits, trial and error is the only way we can learn to mod.
BTW your hubby sounds like the bomb!! Mine also cooks but only if he's in the mood or I con him that my cooking skills haven't kicked in for the day and he's about to be served a dud... like Bacon, baked beans and cheese on toast -- It gets him sprinting into the kitchen real quick I tell you lol!

J-Vo, I wake up every week amazed at hubby and I. You know, we were married at the young age of 19 because I was pregnant and I found out years later that my brother and my BIL actually had bets going on how long we'd last. Needless to say my brother has yet to have a real relationship with a female and my BIL altho he made a mess of his younger life he has turned it around and has just recently had a baby boy.

Vera, I love that you post in the middle of the night for me -- I get to wake up and your post is there waiting for me. Good on you for giving yourself a treat -- cut and colour is an instant pick me up. Can't wait to hear from the new GLAM VERA.

WELCOME GB!!
Yip, it does take a bit of getting used to to figure out where you are comfortable on the boards. This is an amazing group of friends who all share the same goal -- to live life in moderation!
We share story's, experiences, goals and when needed or asked for, we give advice.
I'm looking forward to getting to know you better -- 3 kids, shew!

Eve, hang in there friend. It's a long windy road and we're in it for the long haul!

Vladster - where art thou??? and where's Rozz, I'm missing her!

Today I am grateful to be blessed with a loving, understanding and warm family. Both my parents are alive and I love them to bits... they would do anything for us kids to ensure our happiness. I am also blessed with a sister who was a "laat lametjie" (a late lamb) and she is 18. We get along so well, more like best friends and she is coming to spend the weekend with us.
And on that note I must sign off and go and fetch her and spend an hour "bonding" with my Pops!

[vlad]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

I'm here!

and Rozz is actually male...



He has stubble for goodness sake.

[Eve11]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

DeeBee;474047 wrote: .
1. IMHO Planning is what makes the difference between modding sucessfully or not. m
2. Before MWO I would've drunk 4 glasses before hubby had even got home and then 3 or 4 at dinner and then still carried on drinking when we got home.
3. "My 2.5 months AF simply did not teach me how to moderate. I have only learned this skill hrough trial and error."

Morning DeeBee and mod squadrons!
1. DeeBee: What does the acronym IMHO stand for? Can't figure that one out. Had the worst time with ODAT as a newbie (for our newest member...one day at a time).
2. Haven't we all come so far with how we're slowing our drinking down just by being so aware of it. I used to think 3 was being good and moderating for me. That has changed.
Jump over to my new post paradigm shift if able everyone as that one addresses this issue more.
3. I'm wondering if you're not giving that AF time the credit it's due? Just curious but aren't there times when you're struggling ... should I ...shouldn't I have that next one and you can think back to how good you felt on during that AF time and say no easier?
Personally I am loving how I feel on mornings I've been AF the day and night before. Today is an example. Clear head...feel great...ready to tackle the world. No remorse, no nagging headache. Especially no "What did I do or say last night?"
I'm loving it!
Tonight we're doing early Thanksgiving as hubby and I will be headed to Thailand the day before Thanksgiving. (Anyone with any Thailand info/advice please feel free to share). So, my history has always been drinking big on holidays. Have 1 bottle of a good white I plan on sharing between 3 adults and sparkling water for the kids and for me when the bottle is gone. Need to keep remembering how nice it is to enjoy a little wine with a good meal but that the taste isn't as great as how a good nonhangover day feels!
Hello/Cheers to all! Any newbies lurking? Hop on board!
Hugs
Eve11

[periwinkle]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

Good morning everyone!

Getting Better, I'm so glad you found the Mod Squad! It is a good support group for those who are moderating. I think you are heading in the right direction too. As I recall from your first post on MWO you had 2 weeks AF. That's awesome! We learn a lot from those AF times. As you will soon see, we don't judge you here for "violating your rules" (as you put it). I think you are doing great! So I hope you're not beating up on yourself. I look forward to getting to know you better!

Thanks for the replies everyone to my moderating questions. I know that with my analytical brain I can tend to over analyze everything. I was told by someone early on (on a different thread) that I was thinking too much about drinking and that wasn't a good thing. So I'm trying to figure out where the balance is. I don't plan out everything in my life, quite the opposite for many things, but like the birthday cake, I think it's important if I know something is coming up where I think I might like to have a beer that I consider that in to the days leading and following.

BTW, DeeBee Brats are usually sausage-like meat, usually pork, usually served on a bun with mustard. Both my dad and hubby come from German parents and both also looove saur kraut with their brats. Me, not so much on the saur kraut. But I'm sure there will be plenty of it available for them, it's just a "thing" that many like to have with (or in their case on their) brats.

Vera, I can't wait to "see" your new do urgirl: LOL! I'm sure we'll see/hear it in your "voice".

Catch up more later,

periwinkle

[DeeBee]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

Yay Rozz is back!!
Gotto run as my Sis is here hanging over my shoulder trying to get a peek at what I have to say lol!
Have a great weekend all!

[zed]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

Hi Children,

late, just got home, read the thread and there is a lot to reply to. But it's late and I'm so happy to lay down after a night at a bar, so will keep this short and catch up on the rest of the conversations and thread later on.

Eve, you lucky girl you, Thailand! Well I can give u advice as I've been. The point is, what do you want to do and what do you not what to do? Thailand is a lot like India in a sense (but less so) that you cannot decide what you want to experience; it's a place that will create the experience for you. And it will be a good experience.

Bangkok. I am thinking that if you hear the following names, avoid them: Pat-pong. Soy-na-na. And Soy-ka-boy. These are the 3 red light districts of Bangkok. Worth a walk through in my opinion, any one of them, but I'd understand if you felt that was not required. FOR SURE PLEASE AVOID if any young ones are with you and the hubs.

OK folks. Time for bed.

More soon. Have GREAT weekends all my lovelies.

Kiss. Z

[Lila]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

hi all
welcome Getting Better! Glad you are here, this is a great place to get support. I think there is more tolerance here of different choices, mod, don't mod, mod incorrectly, etc.
Hi Eve it means In My Humble Opinion!
Just a quick drop in...now I am hungry for a brat! Or an Italian sausage.
Read everyone's posts, have everyone in mind and thinking of you all - have to rush off, too much to do today! But I had to stop here for a bit.
Lila

[Delta Moon]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

Hi All- I've been super busy with work and familybut have been thinking of you all. Congrats, Peri!

Am staying pretty clean, though. Wanted to go AF for the month but took a special trip over the weekend and had a few glasses of wine. Not giving myself a hard time, though. I've come so far!

Next goal is beating my longest AF streak- 9 days. Have a party this Sat. nite with BIG drinkers. Will keep that goal in mind and God willing will get thru AF. Any ideas to help? Will take my L-glut, and will drink seltzer and lime.
My skin and hair are really looking great! Amazing when you get all that poison out of your system how your body just flourishes!

Good weekend to you all!

[Sarasmiles]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

Hi Everyone,
It really made me smile to check in here and read all the friendly welcomes. Thank you!
Yes, Periwinkle, I recently did two weeks AF...before that I'd gone 60 days , with one "slip" (hate to call it that, actually, it was a choice, not a slip) of a couple of glasses of wine. At the time I got so down on myself about that...because I was trying to completely abstain. I agree about the paradigm shift. One of the reasons I want to develop a happy feeling about drinking moderately is that I am prone to guilt...Feeling like I messed up and taking it hard. I guess I see certain things in black and white...I'm eating healthy, or I'm not, I'm exercising regularly or not at all, I'm drinking in an out of control way or not at all. Moderation in all things, right?

I went without Kudzu for a few days and then had those two drinks last night. I took it again today and so far no thoughts of drinking, although it's only 3:50 in the afternoon here in Massachusetts. My kids are home from school and watching cartoons, and I'm going to go cuddle up with them in a minute. 5:00 used to be when I'd crack open the wine, but I'm much less apt to do that now. I try to get out with the kids, or have a good snack and a cup of herbal tea, or light a fire in the fireplace. Comforts and distractions seem to work best. Before I sign off, I want to share a few of my rules, which are still under construction:

No hard liquor (I'm not good at predicting its effects)
Only red wine for now (I drink white faster, and I like it more)
No drinking when I'm in a really bad mood, stressed out by the kids or feeling any feelings I'm trying to escape from.
No more than two glasses, unless it's a long evening out, in which case I might plan ahead carefully to space out three.

I'm torn about adding "never drink alone", because my husband works late, and travels a lot for work, and I might want to have a glass or two without him sometimes. I don't want to make a rule I'm likely to break, because then the guilt starts up.

Today I bought these small bottles of red wine - they look like about 1 1/2 glasses each. I figure that way I won't have an open bottle "going bad" on the counter to give me a reason to drink on a day when I otherwise might not.

Sorry, long post. See you later!

[j-vo]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

Happy Friday moddies!
Oh, how good it feels to get a whole week of work completed without having to resort to any drinks! I hope everyone had a great Friday. I know some of you, Zed and Deebs are already starting Sat. Well, at least Zed is.

Vera, have a super time with your two girls. I know you have to be thrilled with the upcoming visit. Thanksgiving is actually the most busy time of year for visits and travelling. Even more than x-mas.

Eve, have a great trip to Thailand. How long have you been planning the trip? Do you have any specific plans for touring? Sounds great!

Deebee, are you that young! Forgive me for making calculations - 14 years with hubby, 19 years old, shit! you and Zeddy are 33 years young! Bitch! No, I'm sorry. Just kidding!!!! My husband and I have been married 18 years. I've been dating him since I was 15. I dated him for 10 years. Ok. You do the math! Have a good time with your sister!

Getting better - I can relate to the pattern of thinking "all or nothing." Gosh! Can I really relate. That's my addictive personality, and that's why rules work. Your rules look very much the same as mine, but I think I've got about 15 more! But you've listed the most important ones. You are on the fence about "never drink alone" because your hubby travels. I think I would be shaky with that one. I truly wouldn't trust myself to open a bottle of wine at home for myself. I don't see me stopping at two. I think I'd have two, then turn on the stereo, talk myself into another one, get on the computer, down another . . . So, if your habits are different, maybe you can do that. Remember, this is trial and error.

Lila, St. John - rock on ladies. St. John - you're hair and skin are glowing! Are you sure you're not pregnant? (are you a female?) Here in the states, a transexual (man who was born a woman) just had a baby. It was very hard to adjust my eyes to seeing a pregnant man. But hey, to each his own!

Zed, I know you said you were living in Ohio, but I can't remember where. I live pretty close to Cleveland. Was there for a conference about 6 years ago.

My son's birthday party is tomorrow. After we take him and some of his friends out to dinner and games, we'll be coming back to our house for a sleep-over. They won't sleep! I've got my earplugs ready to go. Have a great weekend all!

[Sunbeam]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

St. John,
I'm glad to see you here again, glad to know you are doing well. You sound ready to beat that Saturday night gig. What works for me if I get a craving is a mantra prayer. Repeat 3 times, then ask for Peace. Maybe this one comes comes from the Catholic church: Lamb of God, who takes away the sins of the world, have mercy on us; (3 times) then, Grant me peace.

Eve, have a wonderful time in Thailand.
Regarding that quote, my 2.5 months AF definitely did enable me to remember what a better life I had before alcohol took over as much as it did. It made me want to have many AF days, and let me begin establishing new habits which don't include alcohol. What I learned at first when I tried to moderate was that I did not know how to drink moderately, and some of my bad habits were way more established than my newer AF habits. Putting alcohol into the picture really changes a lot of things, and I truly understand why so many people say they just can't moderate. It was a real struggle for me for 5 months, and I often felt I was really stupid for continuing to drink at all. Around late August I finally figured out that I can't drink any more often than once a week, less than that is better. If I do, irrational alcoholic reasoning will prevail, and I will lose control of my alcohol intake. But if I stay at that low level, I can drink like a normal person, just a glass or two without wanting more. I have had no strong cravings since early September. I remember that day well, the last time I caved. My work was closed unexpectedly due to a power outage. I had too much time on my hands, with no plans or obligations. My DRINK light came on. I had a presentation that night, and it was important that I be sober for it. I opened a bottle of wine around noon, and had two glasses. Then, I think it was the hand of the Lord, I found myself pouring sparkling water into my glass. I drank the water, took a nap, ate some good food, had coffee, felt fine by evening for my presentation. What a story, huh? That was the last time I had a strong craving. Now, I think about maybe having a drink at times, but it is not compelling. Mostly I don't want to drink.

J-vo,
So nice you read your positive post - what a difference a few days make! I have so much love and respect for all that teachers do. It is never easy.

GettingBetter,
Welcome! It is great to have a plan to start out. But don't be afraid to change something if you keep slipping. There are so many levels and ways of moderation. I try to mostly just describe my own thoughts and experience. If you want to take anything away from that, you are welcome to it. I am a very moderate drinker, use Drink Tracker faithfully and honestly (1 drink = 5 oz. wine, 1 bottle = 5 glasses). I don't use meds or supplements because I had quit drinking without them a few days before I found this site. For me personally it would not make sense to take stuff just to be able to drink - I'd rather just quit. Alcohol has been enough of a burden in my life. But I just want to enjoy a glass or two on more special occasions. I'm still defining that for myself, but it means drinking less than weekly.

Deebs, I always hear your applause, and it is a warm feeling of connection.

I think I have already mentioned most of my major gratitudes, but I will try to keep mentioning smaller ones. Right now I am grateful that I am sober. I am momentarily leaving to see a performance with a friend. I used to just drink on Friday nights, had pretty much stopped going anywhere.

Take care, all.

[periwinkle]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

[QUOTE=Sunbeam;473662] My 2.5 months AF simply did not teach me how to moderate. I have only learned this skill through trial and error.
QUOTE]

Sunbeam, I've been thinking about this throughout the day today. I think my AF time has taught me what some of my triggers are. I'm sure not all of them. Hopefully some of what to watch out for. It makes sense and I think I'm feeling a bit nervous about that part of it. I think I want to do this perfectly and not make any mistakes. I want to learn from the pros (like you... no pressure) but that's not usually how life works is it?

Did I miss something? When did Eve tell us about a trip to Thailand? I've been looking for it and can't find it? And zed in Ohio? I think I'm loosing my mind!

Hi St John, good to hear from you! Do you take kudzu? That seems to really help me. Good luck. Let us know how it works out.

Hubby just got home. I will check in with every one tomorrow.

periwinkle

[zed]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

Hello folks, so it's Saturday afternoon here already. Your Americans are still dealing with Friday - hha ha. I'm way ahead of you!

Ok, so Friday evening came around and I had a planned evening out with a mate. Had invites to his ultra-posh gig at the Hyatt (fancy fancy) - the 175th anniversary party of a Swiss watch maker!! - all the beautiful people were out, and then there was me and my mate! ha. It was funny. Anyway, I very, very rarely (once in a very blue moon) go to parties like that. In fact these last few months I rarely even go out in the evenings. So before any of you think it, no, I'm not one of those weird party snobs who goes to fancy swiss watch making parties. Just went coz we had free tickets and it was somewhere to go and hang out. The gig was pretty lame (as they always tend to be) and we were soon off. But stayed long enough to have a couple of whiskeys on the rocks. Free bar. Dangerous. But like all free bars, thankfully, very small pours. 15-20ml with loads of ice. So really nothing more than a tipple by my standards.

I was ready to head home but my mate wanted another drink so we went to a watering hole right next to my home. Stayed there (much more mellow) and talked until 2AM. We each had 3 mojitos. Best mohitos in Beijing. The evening was planned, I knew that I'd be taking in approx. 5 drinks this Friday night - due to the special occasion - and it is fine. That's how I define moderation for myself. Moderation to me, means that I do not surprise myself. Unlike some of you guys (Peri, Lilac?), I am not one to plan my life. I just float through my existence and things happen on the way. So, that being as it is, my rules and definitions are more fluid. I have a general understand, a pact, with myself. I know when I am fine, and when I am not fine. I know when I am drinking to get blottered and when I am drinking and in full control and feeling okay. I know my line. So long as I'm honest with myself...

Anyhow, what I want to report is that I drank moderately, very slowly AND had glasses of water between each drink. Got home, exhausted, went to bed, woke up exactly 8 hours later, showered, drank lots more water, made a cup of coffee, and feeling good. No remnants of last night in the system.

On the topic of moderation, besides (1) frequency, (2) volume of intake and (3) AL content level, there's another measure/ control-element that I feel we need to be aware of and use to our advantage - (4) quality of AL. Which brings me back to my experience last night. I had the equivalent of 5 drinks. But the whiskey was premium stuff. And the mojitos were at one of the finest bars in Beijing, where the AL they use is primo. So the net effect is a cleaner feeling, more controlled therefore, and the next morning the poison is largely gone from the system.

SO. I am going to make this rule for myself. I will only drink GOOD booze. VERY TOP-END stuff. If (1) it is not available and (2) I cannot afford it, THEN, I WILL NOT DRINK.

The wine has to be very good wine. No more 8 dollar bottles. The whiskey has to be single malt. Beer has to be micro-brewed. The vodka has to be Grey Goose and well-mixed by a professional. I WILL NOT BE MAKING MYSELF ANY COCKTAILS ANY MORE. The gin has to be Bombay Sapphire. No more Tanquerey.

Let's see how this works out. I think, given my 'fluid, organic' sort of 'existence' where pre-planning my days is more "difficult" (that's just my reality and how I live my life, and it comes from my spirituality as well) and I want to add this rule in for myself and really stick by it. I think if I do, then moderation is well on its way of being a life-long reality and my well-being will be preserved by default. Also I'll enjoy the few drinks that I do have more, because it's about the finer things in life... that's how I want to live, and not just with moderation of drink, but with everything. Quality. A few friends, but good ones. A few words, but good ones. A few relationships, but the best ones. Better, deeper breaths. Whatever I participate in must be the best. Otherwise I must leave it. I welcome what's good and healthy and positive into my being, into my life. I walk away from the rest. I am embracing well-being...

Gettingbetter - happy you are here! Hope you stick around with us. And St. John, nice to hear from you. Hi there! I like that, your skin is glowing! Nice.

Eve - Thailand. Are you going north or south? Islands? If north, then do go to Ayuthuya, the ancient city. Also the river Kwai tour just outside Bangkok is nice for a day. And of course, Chiang Mai up north is great if you have a few days to make it up there. South, well, the beaches... islands.. I'd HIGHLY recommend Koh Samui. It's a little piece of heaven. I'm sure you have your plans laid out already. Have a blast. Say hi to the Elephants for me. I'm a big Elephant person by the way. Elephants and I have a special connection. I have stories... As you will see I hope, the Thais are some of the warmest, nicest people around. Smiling. They got it figured out. Remember to fold your hands and bow your head a little when you see them, and say "sa-waa-dhi!" that's the greeting.

Someone asked about the restaurant cat. Well, there was a cat in the restaurant we ate at the other day, the Yunan place on my friend's birthday. The cat lived in the restaurant. She slept on the chair at our table. Probably not something that happens in the west, with food & health safety standards blah blah at restaurants. But here in China and Asia one comes across pets in restaurants all the time. Good stuff.

Ohio - Yes Peri. I lived in Ohio. for 4 years. followed by 2 years in NYC where I worked and lived. Ohio was college. Jvo, I was just south of Cleveland. Wooster. Wayne county. But I spent a lot of time in Cleveland. Shaker Heights. One of my best friends lives there still. Oh boy. Cleveland. The buckeye state. That was many lifetimes ago already.

Sun I like your mantra. I am going to memorize it and use it. Thanks for that

Ok I must go. As always I've talked too much. It's lunch time. Bachelor boy has to go scrounging for food... Have fun everyone. Btw, when's thankgiving? Soon right? Happy thanksgiving!

Today I thank everyone in my life today for the support and peace and the love that they give me. I am so blessed. I know such amazing people, and I have such an amazing family. I spoke to my parents last night before I went out. They called. What amazing people. If I can be half the man that my father is... and half as strong as my beloved mother... then I am well-sorted.

And I thank the Universe and her endless energies for my health... for OUR health.

Here's to our health!

z

[DeeBee]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

Morning Squad -- Saturday morning here and the sun is shining FINALLY!

St John, great to hear from you!!
Suggestions for not drinking when approaching a big party, hmmm I used to say that I was on medication and I couldn't drink -- worked a treat until I used it too often and my friend thought I must be seriously ill and started getting worried. I have (on occassion) just said NO thanks, I'm not drinking tonight and blow me down if everyone just said, oh okay and left me to it!
But planning m AF drinks was crucial to the sucess of the evening. I would take along a couple of AF beers and lots of iced tea so that I didn't find myself at a loose end what to drink and end up with a glass of wine instead. The other thing that helps is to pour my iced tea into a wine glass -- not so much to fool myself but I think I do it to still be socially acceptable to my friends that feel threatened by my AF evening.

Vladster, what are you up to this weekend? Anything exciting?

Vera, how is the hair dooo looking? I can never stay at home once I've had my hair done -- I always insist that hubby takes me out for dinner lol!

GB, your plan sounds very solid! You have put some careful thought into it. I have found my first rough draft of modding rules has changed over time as I've become more confident that I CAN and WILL do this. For me personally drinking by myself is a huge no no, especially because my hubby also travels alot and that used to be when the wheels really fell off. He recently went overseas for 2 weeks and with the exception of my birthday when I was out with friends I did not drink at all while he was away.

J-Vo, ROFL!!! I knew that would catch you all out -- my age. Yip Zed aka BB and I are the same age, well I have just turned 34 so I am the oldest! lol!! If my Math is right, that would make you 43??
Enjoy your Sons party today -- i'll be in your shoes in 2 weeks time. My darling daughter was born on the 30th of December -- crappy date for her as it's never a good time for her friends as everyone is away so we have a party for her the week that school breaks up. This year due to all her "mis-dimeanars" (sp?) she will only be allowed a group of GIRLfriends to stay over and I'm going to throw her a bit of a dinner party.

Peri, I am so pleased that you also aren't sure of exactly all your triggers. Whenever I was asked I really had to dig deep as to what was the "cause" of my drinking. I too don't have the answers but I have found that the H.A.L.T acronym does come into play a lot for me. Hungry, Angry(or irritated) Lonely (or bored) and Tired (and grumpy). I will NOT drink if I am feeling any of these!

Eve, a couple of years ago friends of ours went to Thailand for their honeymoon and loved it so much that they convinced us that we should all go. So we booked one of those packages, paid the deposit and nearer the time when we tried to get hold of them to question something the had ducked -- with our money! So I'm afraid I still haven't been but would love to go -- in the meantime I can't wait to hear what you think of it when you go.

Zed aka Boxer Boy, being honest with ourselves is such a huge step towards maintaining our goals. Who are we kidding when we have that extra drink? I have to do this for ME so if it turns pear-shaped I only have ME to look at and yes, that has been a huge learning curve for me. Odd that you mentioned "quality" of AL. I too have been buying wine by the bottle lately lol I used to buy the crap stuff in the biggest box I could find. I am learning to appreciate different wines, kinda like stepping out of my comfort zone.
I love all this talk we are having with MODERATION being the key to life. I think this is really something for me to work on more. My Mum's fav saying is "everything in life in moderation" -- wise Mum!

Sun, I hope you had a lovely evening out with your friend, what did you go see. Fridays also used to be a big night for me. Saturday would be spent hungover and then I would start drinking again from lunchtime onwards. My life has certainly changed for the better.

My gratitude for today is: I am grateful not to work on weekends! Might sound a bit arb to some but my previous job was rather stressfull and I used to travel 5 days a week (and be away from home) and weekends I would still either be on call or working the stores. My job now closes at lunchtime on a friday and only re-opens on Monday morning. At first I didn't know what to do with all the spare time I had on weekends so I would drink it away but now, I am loving it! It is 8am I am still in bed (with my laptop and coffee). Soon I will get up and make the girls pancakes for breakfast, then some shopping is in order. A bit of gardening later and then we'll watch the rugby. My weekends are now filled with family, friends and fun.

(in the time it has taken me to write this post the sun has dissappeared and the day has turned overcast and threatening to rain:-(( )