Jumpin' June

[JACQRABBIT]

Jumpin' June

Sunbeam;880365 wrote: Hi Jacqrabbit,
Welcome to the group! Do you wish to state your goal? It isn't clear to me whether you plan to stick with occasional drinking, or try a higher frequency. You are welcome to post her in any case, with or without goals.

Hello Sunbeam,

I haven't really thought about a specific goal as such.

I really enjoy a wine (singular, 2 at the most) with a good meal but not every meal and definitely not during the work week.
I am going to Cairn's with my husband and young teenage children next month and I expect that I will drink more while there but not to excess.

So if that constitutes a goal there it is.

I am probably clearer on what I don't want.
I know I never want to 'skoll' a bottle of wine and hide the evidence again.
I always want to remember what I had for dinner, what I said, and to whom I said it.

And I never want to speak crap to the people I love most and wonder the next day why they cannot look me in the eye.

And I would love to post here and consider myself a 'moderator'

[Sunbeam]

Jumpin' June

OK Jacqrabbit, I do declare you are on the occasional drinking path and we are glad to have your company. I find it a big relief to not even consider having a drink during the week. I guess to "skoll" a bottle of wine would be to drink it all? We are also happy to have representation from your part of the world. There are many cultural lessons we can find here.

[canadiangirl]

Jumpin' June

Welcome, JACQRABBIT and Clare. I nearly forgot my manners.

@ Sunbeam (other thread) - my very best biking story comes from Jasper Nat'l Park last summer. We were mountain biking some distance from the townsite around dusk and somehow came between a bull elk and his harem. He was calling them in for the night and did not appreciate our presence. He put his antlers down and charged us! Talk about going like the wind! :H:H:H

[letgolaughing]

Jumpin' June

ok. i can't wait til i can come here and talk about something other than drinking like the rest of you do, ie. sun and CG talk about biking, etc.

i have been racking my brain to try and figure out if i should taper again or if i should have an af day despite my fear of withdrawals. the 5 drinks a day on vacation keep making me think that i am worse off then i was 6 months ago. when in reality, it's not like i've had 5 drinks a day for a month.

anyway, i digress.

i think what is really bothering me is that if i decide to "taper" then it will be next week before i get an AF day in and that will mean i will have had a drink everyday for over 18 days in a row. i think that bothers me more.
in the past few months i've never drank more than 6 days in a row and i feel like i'm screwing that up.

so don't you think that between the lesser of the 2 evils i should choose not to prolong it?

i need to be AF tonight. that means only 10 days in a row. if i wait til tomorrow, it's 11, next day, it's 12...before i know it, it'll be 30 and i'll be just as scared.

so, i need the encouragement for tonight. i have a headache today and it's telling me that i should have a beer tonight because it is a sign of withdrawals...and things to come tonight if i don't drink.

what do you think?

af tonight or taper?

[Sunbeam]

Jumpin' June

LetGo,
I definitely would like to help you through as many AF days as you can muster. The withdrawal fear prompted by your OCD is nonsense, but very real to that part of your brain. Your brain also wants more alcohol (people here sometimes refer to it as THE BEAST) so you are fighting two opponents, not just the Beast. But you can do this with our help: Go for tonight AF! I believe you are ready to challenge your opponents!

[canadiangirl]

Jumpin' June

AF tonight, for sure.

I was drinking about the same as you have been the last week or two , perhaps more, when I went AF at first, one or two days a week. It was nothing. The withdrawal issue is for people who drink far more than that. If you really don't feel you can do it, can you phone an alcohol treatment facility tomorrow and get a professional's opinion on it?

[letgolaughing]

Jumpin' June

hi y'all
well, i'm just having the most wonderful evening.
i decided to go AF cause as sun said it's nonsense. my brain is tricking me. i know it, but then again, i doubt it. anyway... AF.

i decided that if i prolong it by tapering then the days of drinking in a row would add up and i worry more about that. so... AF tonight.

i had a moment when i was going to cave and let myself have 1 drink tonight because my child is sleeping over at a friends unexpectedly and so it was date night for me and my hubby. but instead, i asked my hubby to be AF with me and of course he said he would(he is AF alot of nights).
so back to my evening. i went to zumba(exercise)from 5 to 6p. then dropped my child at his friends and chatted with the mom for an hour. she had a beer and offered me one but i declined yay me. then i came home and hubby and i went out to eat a bite and didn't drink. that was odd. but it was nice. i picked up some fav magazines on our way home. took a hot bath. talked to my cousin on facebook. had a pellegrino and am now goofing off online piled up in my bed. getting ready to read my mags.
not bad. not bad at all.

hope i don't have a seizure.
xoxo y'all

[Sunbeam]

Jumpin' June

LetGo,
Yay you! You can fight those demons!

[canadiangirl]

Jumpin' June

Don't you love it when you have a battle of wits with your brain and you end up winning? Way to go! :yougo:

[letgolaughing]

Jumpin' June

so glad i was successful that night and also glad i enjoyed myself.

very happy to report i did NOT have a seizure either.

[JACQRABBIT]

Jumpin' June

Hello Junies,

Good for you let go,
I'm guessing that's gotta be a 'HUGE' win for you.

Geez,
I didn't expect modding to be harder to manage than being totally AF.

I had had success modding the previous 2 Friday nights,
choosing to have a single glass of red wine..very good..very happy.

This weekend I tried to apply it to white wine,
my true 'Achilles' and not so successful.
I opened a bottle of white Saturday evening and had a 1/2 the bottle (not to upset with that)
had the other 1/2 Sunday afternoon and opened a second bottle drinking another 2 glasses, woke up thru the night furious with myself, knowing that was definitely a failed attempt.
Monday, I almost justified it as not being an AF day (in Australia was a public holiday)
thank goodness the sensible part of my brain said' NO, it is an AF day' and I tipped that 1/2 bottle down the kitchen sink 1st thing in the morning, looking back I know that if it was in the fridge in the evening I would have drank it.

White Wine is my weakness and it doesn't help that we have a wonderful cellar full of my favorites.
My real concern is that when I'm on holiday next month it will be all too easy to drink daily.

In answer to the 'what is my goal' question that was posed to me recently by Sunbeam,
I want to drink because I 'choose' to and not because I 'need' to.
But never on a work night.

[frances]

Jumpin' June

slipping and need to get back on track

I was doing great for awhile. But - Summer is here and the temptation is overwhelming, and I worry that the 'occasions' will get the best of me. I had a great evening tonight but am drinking my 4th drink as I write. no reason to go over my stated goal of 3 - just got that familiar feeling and wanted to keep on going, and did. I have had this happen more than once this week. The other times were only a couple of drinks but since I've been pretty good with moderating, it doesn't take much to get a strong buzz going and I hadn't eaten much. Anyway, other times this week were no 'special occasion' I just had a bottle of wine in the house and couldn't resist the temptation. I need to get back on track. At least I'm coming back here to keep reading and remember why I wanted to cut down in the first place. I've done this before and summer was where it all slipped back into the routine - I'm worried that will happen again. I know - I need a plan! I will work on that. Thanks to all who are here and succeeding and keep coming back to encourage others and thanks also to those who are still trying - we all need each other and that's what makes this a great place!

Frances

[Sunbeam]

Jumpin' June

Hi Frances,
I'm glad to see your post, it has been pretty quiet here. Summer wine on the patio is definitely a battle zone, but I am winning the battle. Most motivating for me is all the things I enjoy doing, and that I do more and better without wine. Frequently thinking about this and making specific plans works better than having a plan to drink ___ then stop.

That said, I am going above my usual drinking frequency limit this weekend. I am celebrating the first days of the next chapter in my life. A 3 week full time training program for my new job begins this upcoming week, and after that I will be working just three days per week. I had two glasses with a good friend Friday eve, one glass with dinner yesterday, and I will have 2-3 glasses with another friend today. Then I'm done until at least next weekend.

Take care, all. I gotta go on my morning bike ride.

[frances]

Jumpin' June

Thanks Sunbeam - you are a model to me! Drinking always makes me pretty lazy so I know what you mean. I like your idea of making plans ahead of time for things you want to do and so you won't be drinking (to me, that sounds better than making plans to not drink - those plans are not as fun!). I'll give that a try!

By the way - congratulations on your new job and new chapter - sounds exciting!

I continued my negative trend through the weekend. Did what I haven't done since I came back here which is I had a whole bottle of wine on Saturday night. Then 3 more drinks Sunday. I'll be AL free this week but I'm going on vacation and I know there will be drinking. I'm going to try to stick with no more than 3 a day while on vacation. I know I can do this!

[letgolaughing]

Jumpin' June

hi all
don't feel much like posting lately but have been lurking.
summer is tough. too many reasons to have a drink or two.
haven't had an af day in about 2 weeks.
but, all in all haven't been drinking as much as last summer.
so, just gonna try to get back on track with some af days next week and go from there. we'll see.