April Mod Squad

[rebirth]

April Mod Squad

j-vo;1097689 wrote:
IAnother quote: "I have learned that although at times alcohol seemed to rule my life, it was only a small facet and I always had the 'power' to refocus its role."

Another quote: "When drinking, the positive benefits (that warm, relaxed buzz) almost always happens during the first two drinks, max three. After that, the negatives of drinking kick in." I need to remind myself before the second drink that it is the last "good" one.

Those are great quotes j-vo! And thats SOOOO true about the third drink because I always started losing the plot after my third.

Well me and the boyfriend have been chatting and are meeting up this weekend to see if we can save it. I am so so happy that I didnt reach for that bottle. I also know that if our relationship cannot be salvaged, there is no way that I will turn into a drunk.

It's not worth it.

[rebirth]

April Mod Squad

Cher,
You say that it's just been two weeks for you but I think that you will be successful in modding. You seem to be aspproaching it with a very healthy attitude. I was unsure of myself for the first month or so because I was conditioned to think that abstience is the only way to solving my drink problem.

But three months later and dealing with the ups and downs of life,I have no desire to revert back to the old me again. Ever! No more drunken girl, no more hangovers. Social drinking only. Infact I love my AF week days and I look forward to the weekend but not because I allow myself to drink, just purely because I get to have free time off.

[j-vo]

April Mod Squad

Cher,
Did you just move into a new house? Good luck with your raspberry garden. Sounds great! That's one thing I'd like to experiment more with - gardening, specifically an herb garden. My husband cooks and I love fresh basil in just about everything.

Rebirth,
That's great you'll be talking to your BF this weekend. And it's good that you both have had time to think about your relationship before trying to work things out. I hope it goes the way it's suppose to go, and good for you on not picking up. Those triggers are not going to go away, but the awareness is key along with the tools to get past the difficult times.

I think we all had significant AF time before modding, which I think was extremely important to being successful. In the responsible drinking book, it's recommended that everyone do at least a 30 prior to modding, but I also think that I will incorporate a 30 every year or maybe every 6 months, or maybe if I ever see things aren't going as I expect them to go. It's easy to see any new patterns emerge.

Continuing vigilance is the price of continuing success.

Responsible drinking is drinking that provides pleasure and relaxation without putting oneself or others at increased risk for negative consequences.

Have a great night!

[Cherbear]

April Mod Squad

Hi J-vo and Rebirth

Thanks for the words of encouragement!! I am a little concerned since its early on...but like you said having been AF for that period I know what it feels like to feel good without AL and I don't want any of that back!!!
J-vo, I moved to a new house the end of January that has 5 acres!! lots of changes for me in the last few months with that. longer commute to work and my hubby semi retiring which has been a huge transition. Him home more!!! but with move, he has a place to do his "thing" now outside the house so its not as bad as it could be.
I ordered the book you guys recommended.

[j-vo]

April Mod Squad

Morning!
Well, Cher, your new home sounds awesome. That's a lot of land and will give hubby plenty to do. My dad retired a few years ago, but still has a his hands in the business a wee bit and loves that he can do that and not have all of the stress. How long is your commute to work? Glad you ordered the book. It's excellent for learning and staying on track with your goals.

Yesterday after work, went to a bar/restaurant with coworkers. We have not done this in a long time as most of us have children now. I haven't done this all year, as I was abstinent the first 6 months of school. It was a really nice time! I actually had more fun than I ever have. I had three lite beers, one an hour. So I was able to have a great time socializing. Of course I ate a pretty good amount as well and drank water in between. Lots of good tools used and great time was had! I'm very happy with the outcome.

When I got home, hubby and I took my dog for a walk around the neighborhood. That was good because I needed to burn a few calories.
Today, I'm going to my neighbors daughter's wedding shower with a girlfriend and her daughter. I'm looking forward to it. I used to dread these things, but now I think, "wow, good food, good conversation," and I'm just happy to go and enjoy.

I bought "Just Dance" for Wii. Has anyone tried it? It's is sooooooooooooooo fun. They show you moves to each song and you try to keep up with the correct moves. The music is great. And the calories you burn in incredible. I know if I'm sweating, I'm burning.

Have a great weekend!

[coalfire]

April Mod Squad

rebirth;1096776 wrote:


..These problem drinkers have some problems related to their control over their drinking, and they may drink often and excessively, and may even take dangerous risks like drinking and driving. But they have not developed the near total and consistent loss of control over drinking, and the series of repeated negative consequences related to it, that marks alcoholism. A classic problem drinker is the college student who engages in binge drinking or the housewife whose nightly glass of wine turns into a nightly bottle. These problem drinkers can usually stop or moderate when they wish to.

This is an excellent quote and should be given full attention. Sometimes we make the mistake of thinking we are all the same on MWO but we are not!
IMHO people who experience"total and consistent loss of control over drinking" have very little chance of moderating(although it didnt stop me from trying) but problem drinkers may have a chance. Its like AA says. Its not how often you drink or how much you drink but WHAT HAPPENS YOU WHEN YOU DRINK. I think that these few lines could save people a lot of misery if they really looked at it and let the message in. Thanks for posting this.

[kiwi69]

April Mod Squad

Hi all
I am new here.
I started topamax 10 days ago..and seem to have been OK mods wise since then although I am rather scared.
I did 2 years abs with AA after 10 years of being a functional alcoholic drinking in excess on weekends and nil in the week. The abs was way better than the drinking but I hope to become a social drinker.
Karin

[Cherbear]

April Mod Squad

Welcome kiwi69,

I too am rather scared, trying to realize that i can manage this after a long stent of abstinence.

This is a great thread, having a plan for moderating is a must for me. measuring , being mindful and being careful of triggers that would cause over drinking and NOT drink at all then.

[kiwi69]

April Mod Squad

OK I will share my plan.
I plan to drink no more than 2 nights a week, and usually no more than 2 drinks a night....always in company.
I don't want to drink when stressed out or overwhelmed as those times have led to overdrinking in the past.
I want drinking to be a small enjoyable part of my life.

So there it is. I hope I can do it.
Did you people use Topamax and the supplements to get success?
Kiwi

[rebirth]

April Mod Squad

Hi. Just wanted to check in this lovely Sunday morning to see how everyone is getting on.

Hi coalfire,
That was why I went to AA in the first place , because I drank to get drunk. Thank God that has been squashed. I truely believe I have lost my compulsion to binge drink..

Hi kiwi
Great on your modding so far. Do you have any side effects from Topamax? I dont take any meds, just rely on my own inner strength and will as well as post on MYO. But everyone has their own methods and it’s the end result thats important. Your plans sounds really good. Especially to not drink when you are stressed! I never drink more than 14 units a weekend ( thats approximately 9 small galsses of wine). I usually have two on Friday, 3-4 on Saturday and maybe one on Sunday. I ALWAYS drink no more than one an hour. Even when the first glass tastes amazing and i drink it faster than I would like to. I wait till the hour is up. It works for me

Hi cher,
Wow that’s alot of land! Where are you planting your raspberry plants? I have just planted some seeds of all sorts but i dream of a glass shed full of vegetables and herbs..not impossible to achieve but my garden is unfortunalely very limited for space. Let us know what you think of the book.. Intially modding is very strange as it’s so opposite to how we use to binge drink but as j-vo quoted ..Continuing vigilance is the price of continuing success..and that is so true! It’s been nearly four months and I have had some shit to deal with but I am still moderating very successfully.

Hi j-vo
You sound like you are having a perfect weekend! Well done on the controlled drinking in a pub environment!Isnt it wonderful that you could still walk your dogs after visiting a bar! I use to be so drunk after visiting a bar . All i could do was wolf down a takeaway and go to bed! But like you, I socialise when I go to the pub and I am able to cook myself something when I get home. It’s a wonderful difference.
I rented a Just Dance dvd three weeks ago and I also loved it! Some of the dance movements were difficult for me but I find them to be a challenge and enjoyed trying to keep up with the moves. It is definitely a great workout though. Boy do you sweat!
Actueally, I am going to buy it this week...which one do you have?

My son had to go to casualty on friday because he cut his knee open. He is only six and his gash was to the bone. So after spending ages at the hospital, I returned home feeling mentally exhausted and suddenly feeling very sorry for myself. This was another trigger for me to get drunk.. But I didnt! I drank the usual two glasses of wine that I allow myself on a Friday! I just thought...what is the point in getting hammered? How will it help me and help my son? ABSOLUTELY SOD ALL! Except give me a nasty hangover and a huge dose of self loathing. No thanks!

I feel empowered ladies! It can be done even to a once very heavy drinker like me. I drank on any excuse. I never thought that I could abstain...I never thought that I could moderate!

Have a lovely sunday all. x

[Cherbear]

April Mod Squad

Good Morning All!,

Rebirth your words were so inspiring to me today!!! I am sure in the past I would have taken that self-pity after a long wait at the hospital to over drink, remembering how good it feels to wake up without being rung out by AL ( with AF time) really helps. Funny you said a word I had never heard "casualty" , is that another term for the hospital in the uk? I work in a hospital. I used to give my self all kinds of reasons to drink after work just because I work in a hospital.

re: the garden , my Hubby and I built a fence that is ( hopefully ) deer and rabbit proof and I planted the raspberries in there. I will plant more later when it EVER warms up. WE have had the coldest wettest spring ever. We have millions of wild rabbits all over our property. My dogs go nuts, never can catch the critters. ))

kiwi.. good plan, especially drinking in company.. I know my isolation is a huge trigger for overdrinking for me.

Happy Sunday.
AF for me today!!@!

[j-vo]

April Mod Squad

Evening modders and welcome Kiwi,

Cher, I too was scared to attempt moderation, as I had failed a few years before. I didn't have the many tools that I have now, and I didn't have the long-term abs either. Even moderation takes practice, and it takes awhile to recognize that you don't need to drink so much to feel that relaxation that we all want from a few drinks. It feels good to know that we can read our bodies as far as alcohol consumption and when we need to stop. I know I'm getting much better at this, and modding is becoming easier than it was at first. At first, I was scared, but now I'm becoming more confident in my ability to control it.

I will continue my post after dinner!

[j-vo]

April Mod Squad

Actually I should say I'm becoming more confident in my ability to believe that I can control it.

Kiwi, welcome! I was never on topa, but I had tried baclofen a few years ago. I felt I had too many side effects from it so I quit taking. I have taken several of the recommended supps, but no longer buy any. It seems you're in the same boat as the rest of us here, as we've all gone through the AA program so, therefore, we have substantial time abs. That's so important. Your plan sounds great. When did you stop going to AA? Have your started your moderation plan yet?

Rebirth, I have Just Dance II. It has great songs on it, although I don't know if they would be the same songs as here in the US. Sorry to hear about your little boy! That must have been pretty traumatic for him. Is he doing well now? And congrats to you! That's so stressful, and you were able to control yourself! Good modding!

Last night, my hubby and I went downtown to the casino and enjoyed a few hours there. I had two drinks. It was one and hour or something close to that. He likes to play 3 card poker, and while he did that, I sat in the lounge and listened to a band play. We were home by 10:00 and up at a decent hour today feeling great. My sister and I went spring clothes shopping, as we had so many good coupons and deals. We were out a good 6 hours just shopping.

Another weekend is coming to a close and it was a great weekend! Please remember to check in so we can give each other support. Have a great Monday.

[rebirth]

April Mod Squad

Good morning all

Hi Cher- Casualty is the accident and emergency section. What do they call this department in the US?
I am not surprised you would drink after working in a hospital! I sure would have too when I use to drink heavily.All that trauma and blood.. makes me feel faint! How was your modding on the weekend?

Hi j-vo- I also rented the Just Dance 2. Do you have MC hammer on it? Then it's the same DVD. Well done on your weekend too!

Today am at home looking after my son. I am keeping busy by doing some spring cleaning and sorting out junk.Feeling pretty good! In the past this would have been a battle for me..all this free time to drink..Thank God I am free from this thinking.

Have a lovely monday. I am going to post on ruby tuesday tomorrow. x

[rebirth]

April Mod Squad

I just got to sort out my overeating habits! Arghh. But one day at a time