January Mod Squad

[letgolaughing]

January Mod Squad

hi - it's been kinda weird around here lately. my 10 year old son has been having issues with his best friend. i'm so heart broken over it that it really has me depressed. the friend hasn't spoken to him in a week and my son doesn't know why. before that the friend was just acting like a jerk to him about half the time. it's been very stressful for me because i have such high anxiety. i really just want to FIX it and I can't. So instead i have to just have the anxiety and it makes me depressed.

anyway, because of that, i have not had an AF day in a while. I have been allowing myself 1 glass of wine during the week because frankly, i just needed it. however, i finally managed an AF night last night, so i'm thankful for that.

hope everyone's january is going better than mine....
LGL

[mightymite]

January Mod Squad

Hi LGL,
I'm sorry your son is having problems with his best friend. But believe me, I have 3 boys, and kids emotions change from day to day and probably by next week they will be best friends again. No, you cannot fix it except to be there for your son and support and listen to him. Things get harder as they get older and you should not let this cause too much anxiety for you. Our children do cause us stress but we need to keep things in perspective and take it one day at a time.

I think allowing yourself one glass of wine a week is nothing to beat yourself up over at all. But good on you for your AF night last night.

I hope you feel better soon.

[ToMyHealth]

January Mod Squad

LGL - that's so hard. We hurt when our kids hurt. One gl of wine/night is moderating, but good for you getting the AF night in. You may have broken the cycle. I have a friend who is married to a recovering alcoholic; she's a retired nurse & psychologist and she drinks 1 gl of wine daily for health reasons (not saying she doesn't enjoy it). As far as a better January, thanks, yes I am having a better month except for 1 bad night last weekend. That's in the past. This weekend will be fine.

Ok, lots to do today to spiff up the house, get ready for company. Golf tournament ends today and we might try go catch the shootout (winners of flights compete). To think as a new golfer I was in it last year and partner & I won our flight. It was so nervewracking to hit the ball in front of 250 people and if it was a good shot they would clap - just like watching golf on tv. What an experience!

Make it a good Saturday, modders!

TMH

[Eve11]

January Mod Squad

TMH, You took the words out of my mouth "when our kids hurt, we hurt." Painfully true. However, I have learned we have to just let go and be there if they choose to talk but as MM said things with kids change on a daily basis so we just have to let them figure out their own stuff. Plus it's highly embarrassing for them if parents try to intervene so Let go, hang in there and I guess with pun intended "Let go..."

No time at the moment but just wanted to touch base. Talk soon.
:l
Eve11

[Lila]

January Mod Squad

LGL, we might be related. I go absolutely crazy when my kids hurt. I have high anxiety, too.
Know that you are so important to him and your love and pride in him will get him through the ups and downs of life.

[letgolaughing]

January Mod Squad

it's so nice to hear from a mom with 3 sons, MM, that this is stressful but doable. thanks to all of you for your input. I'm trying. I do KNOW that my anxiety is making it harder then it would be for most moms, so at least that awareness is there. It is good to hear that it is not just US this is happening to(or has happened to). It seems that NONE of my friends have had to deal with this yet so I was feeling really sorry for myself. My sister has dealt with it alot with her son, so she has been very helpful on what to do and not do as well.
anyway, i do know that i turn to wine to relax. so, maybe that is something i need to work on harder. relaxing with some other form. like a book or a bath.

[mightymite]

January Mod Squad

Happy Monday modders,
Thought I'd check in for a bit on this really, yucky day. Brrrr.... But tomorrow is supposed to be mid 50's. What's going on around here? This weather has been on a rollercoaster.

Did fairly well this weekend. Stuck to my 2 glasses of Chardonnay Sat and Sun. I have officially lost 3 lbs. Yay! 4 more to go. Cutting down on my AL has helped tremendously. Took my youngest back to college today. They should never have such a long holiday break. I will miss him but do like my quiet time during the day.

I hope everyone else is doing well.
MM

[ToMyHealth]

January Mod Squad

Hey, good Monday here.

MM - I have never noticed AL to make a difference in wt loss. Bummer - but glad you do, maybe because of less snacking? Maybe it's cuz I'm always hovering close to goal, don't know. I quit the calcium and for 2 days I have lived life so much more normally - no more wrenching stomach pain. Now I need to try the Calcium chews - after golf tomorrow because what a difference in my game not dealing with the stomach issues. I remember stepdaughters coming home for holiday break - 6 weeks. I went nuts picking up the Coke cans, hanging up jackets which they couldn't find because they were where they should be.

Hi LGL - tonite's relaxation is a book for me. I'm tired. Hope things are going better. And even though you have been drinking, it has not been to excess. Feel good about that.

TMH

[Lila]

January Mod Squad

hi gang
i am sorry i haven't been here too much these last few weeks. I have been busy, and I am not used to it. I have been drinking too much and not exercising enough. Okay, time to get back on track.
Everyone here seems to be doing so well lately, am jealous.
Other than that, things are good.
L

[mightymite]

January Mod Squad

Hi Lila,
Welcome back. Good to have you here. You will get back on track. Where there's a will there's a way and you sound like you want to get going again. Take it one day at a time and even if you get a little bit of a workout in and one less drink that's a good start.

I'm plugging along. Same old, same old. Nothing new here. Keeping to my goals.
MM

[Lila]

January Mod Squad

thank you, MM. that is actually just what i needed to hear!
tonight - 2, and I am going to the club. and taking my helpful supps!

[ToMyHealth]

January Mod Squad

Welcome back, Lila! Missed you. My goal tonite is 2 also. Invited to this other couple's house for dinner. Fairly certain another couple who are also invited are teetotalers.

Ok, this is risky but I'm laying out my Feb plan which I plan to start now. My plan is to be AF M-W-Th-Sun. Gives me more AF days than drinking days. It doesn't mean I'll for sure drink on allowed days, just want to see if I can be more structured.

Have a great weekend!

TMH

[mightymite]

January Mod Squad

Hey TMH,
Any plan is a good plan. But I have a question for you modders. I lurk from time to time on the AF sites and they say when they were modding that they hated the planning and waiting for when they could drink. Now I'm going to put myself out there and I do not want to offend any AFers' out there. But I read so many that try and try and try and never really become AF. I feel so bad for them and I know that there are people out there that should not drink at all and I understand the struggle. But when I chose to limit my drinking and formed a plan and chose not to become completely AF, the stress went out the window. I know this does not work for everyone but maybe if some formulated a plan to become modders maybe they would have more success. Does this resonate for anyone? But please understand that I know so many should not be drinking but this has been on my mind lately and I just wanted to know what you all thought. MM

[ToMyHealth]

January Mod Squad

MM - Yes, absolutely what you're saying does resonate with me. Good point. Personally, I can compare it to exercise and housecleaning. When I have a plan, much more gets done.

Last night was quite fun. Did it. Had a glass of wine upon arrival, 1 more with dinner. Was wrong about the teetotalers; they both drank wine. The other place I see them is at the Thurs nite get togethers and I wonder if they restrict themselves to just weekend drinking. Just curious as it appears they are drinking water on Thurs. When I get to know them better, I may ask.

TMH

[Lila]

January Mod Squad

MM, I am not sure, I know it is a sensitive issue on these boards. Maybe it is just an individual thing?
TMH, I think a plan is good. I find it helpful.