Is Mods really attainable?

[ChangeAgent]

Is Mods really attainable?

Just logged vacation week into the tracker (it's public, so anyone can see it). Not within the moderation standard of 14 per week, but compared to what I have drank in the past on vacation to this place (easily 5-10 drinks everyday) this past week wasn't an utter failure.

The day I had 8 drinks (makes me gasp that I did that) was over a 12 hour period. Had one beer on the beach early afternoon then stopped for hours. What was different is that one didn't taste like another and another. I have some zero and 2 count days as well - even brought a half bottle of wine shared with husband at dinner back to the room and didn't have a night cap. Still, 2 heavy drinking nights...

I'm going abs for at least the rest of the week. Vacation is over, it will be wise for me to get back into the groove of abs and raise my consciousness level again.

It is sooo good to have a place to "talk" about this and I can't imagine how horrible holiday would have been if I hadn't found MWO. :h

[Determinator]

Is Mods really attainable?

Cindi, loved your post and I can relate for sure. just out of curiosity does anyone know the actual physiological reason that some of us (most of us probably) are unable to moderate? Everywhere I read in all the various medical journals and reports indicate that we must abstain (and I'm now convinced of this for myself) but I have this nagging need to know why? if I can have this explained to me then I really think I can put this issue to bed and get along in total peace with my commitment to an AF lifestyle...any ideas?

[Fran15]

Is Mods really attainable?

are there any red wines that contain less sulfites than others? thanks in advance.

[eustacia]

Is Mods really attainable?

I write as a lapsed convert.

For the greater part of my time at MWO, I moderated.

Overly the last few months, I've been back to the drive by drinking, the open bottle of wine on the kitchen counter that pour after tiny pour is moderating me. No binges. I don't like to feel drunk, never did. I have a lot of pain in my life. I know that is true for many.

I'm scared. I don't want to drink this compulsively/casually but I neither do I want to abstain.

Has anyone else ever been here? Is moderation worth trying again?

E

[Finding My Self]

Is Mods really attainable?

Eustacia - oh hon....feel for you just now.

Hmmm. I moderate...have done for a couple of months....I was scared to try but needed to know I could - whole heap of reasons not needed here.....

I so know what you mean about the drive by drinking....the sip after sip....and it is just what I WILL NOT let myself do anymore...

I have gone back to all the old rules and regulations of 'middle class drinking' - UK anyway, circa 1930!

Never drink before 6pm. (Exception was with Crimbo lunch only. One glass)
Pour a small glass of wine (up to 125ml) and sit down with it.
Put the bottle away after pouring and leave it there.
Don't hold the glass in my hand continuously.
Sip don't gulp. (If 'gulping' seems around, gulp a big glass of water first!)
Don't drink on the move - like moving around the kitchen/house.
Stay vigilant for the 'hand over the glass' to decline refills if out to dinner - no one minds.
And, for me, dilute with sparkling water (I don't like it 'neat' any more even if it's a really nice wine - doesn't spoil the taste actually!)

And, my choice is: one glass only or no glass at all.

Sometimes after that one glass I want more (sometimes I don't even finish it and relish those ones!!! Yea!) - but only one glass has kept me in the clear decision place and all I have to do is remember 'The Old Days' (ugh!) and everyone here and then my follow-on sparkling water and angostura bitters tastes just fabulous (A sophisticated soft drink as a pal calls it!) Two glasses of wine I believe would get me to that, "Oh, sod it...why not...?" stage and I don't want to go there....I actually don't like being drunk either!! So that's a great thing we've got going for us there, girl!!

But there are times I still would do anything to 'take it all away' for an hour or two....but it just isn't worth the hassle, pain, feeling ill, guilt, worry, disappointment etc etc etc..... And getting out for a walk or putting on a comedian's DVD or something (or even making myself have a damn good cry!) seems to do better...

Never complacent....well, I hope not anyway....but more trusting now that My Rules work if I stick to them....I feel blessed that I can even have them in my life...they'd not work for so many....so I stick to them.

But I know you have pain in your life and all I've said might just be highly irritating....if so, I am sorry! But I am thinking of you, E. I still feel that distant 'kitchen urge' - normally at about 10.30am or something terrifyingly early.....I stamp right on that one and get a coffee!! It's always to do with overwhelm of some sort for me - the post or work or a phone call or straight boredom/procrastination..... "Tough!", I say to myself - "Get on with it; those days have gone forever. You can have your one glass tonight and not before!"

I do so hope I don't come here one day and say it didn't work....but, being lucky and not being taken to blackout by one sip, well, if I do.....it'll only be me getting sloppy! Which is my way of saying I hope this post doesn't sound 'arrogant' or anything....

Hugs Eustacia....
FMS xx

[The Londoner]

Is Mods really attainable?

Finding

You are wonderful! And we love you!

Enough said.

:h Anna:h

[Sunbeam]

Is Mods really attainable?

What's moderation?

I'm new to this site, not new to alcohol. The alcohol problem has been creeping up for years. I'm a binge drinker, Sunday pm's my problem, starting with wine with a noon dinner. Also at social functions I drink more than others, and am later embarassed by that fact alone, not any obnoxious behavior. I have never missed work on Monday, but consuming at least an entire bottle of wine is too much in my book, and I don't feel well all day. I'm now AF 9 days, but that is only one Sunday. I still have hope for moderation, but I'm not convinced that is reality. I am confident I will be successful in abstaining this month, with the help of this forum. Often the people with problems don't spend as much time visiting these forums, so there may be success out there. If I am able to do moderation, it will be just one glass at a dinner out or a special occasion. Is there anyone else out there who has stayed that course?

[Sunbeam]

Is Mods really attainable?

What's moderation?

I'm new to this site, not new to alcohol. The alcohol problem has been creeping up for years. I'm a binge drinker, Sunday pm's my problem, starting with wine with a noon dinner. Also at social functions I drink more than others, and am later embarassed by that fact alone, not any obnoxious behavior. I have never missed work on Monday, but consuming at least an entire bottle of wine is too much in my book, and I don't feel well all day. I'm now AF 9 days, but that is only one Sunday. I still have hope for moderation, but I'm not convinced that is reality. I am confident I will be successful in abstaining this month, with the help of this forum. Often the people with problems don't spend as much time visiting these forums, so there may be success out there. If I am able to do moderation, it will be just one glass at a dinner out or a special occasion. Is there anyone else out there who has stayed that course?

[embraceddarkside]

Is Mods really attainable?

Not yet there, dahlin. I'm still struggling with limiting myself to less than 2 drinks per day. I felt like I made a milestone by having only 1.5 drinks last night. I am looking forward to not needing alcohol---I want to get to a place where I can say no thanks and be perfectly happy with 7up. Stay with us---we are all hoping for the same goal. My mentors are the folks who have succeeded with being AF 7 days or more. I am riding on their strength. I want to be where they are.......

[5thaday]

Is Mods really attainable?

I don'y deny that some heavy drinkers can attain moderation, but I'm a sceptic myself for one simple reason; real moderation shouldn't require any effort, but should be automatic. For example, I smoked my first joint around the same time I tried my first drink. I liked it, and have been using it semi-regularly for over 10 years, but I a) don't mentally obsess over it, b) never go out of my way to obtain it, and c) have never been in trouble because of it. In short, it is automatic and effortless for me to use marijuana moderately. With alcohol my moderation has always been no more than 1 week, and at the cost of around-the-clock mental obsession about the next time I would be allowed to have my 1 or 2 daily drinks. I know marijuana hasn't been proven to be physically addictive, and I doubt it is, but people who prefer it can still develop a huge psychological dependence on it that interferes with their life, so I stand by this analogy.

[skygal12]

Is Mods really attainable?

5thaday;270087 wrote: I don'y deny that some heavy drinkers can attain moderation, but I'm a sceptic myself for one simple reason; real moderation shouldn't require any effort, but should be automatic. For example, I smoked my first joint around the same time I tried my first drink. I liked it, and have been using it semi-regularly for over 10 years, but I a) don't mentally obsess over it, b) never go out of my way to obtain it, and c) have never been in trouble because of it. In short, it is automatic and effortless for me to use marijuana moderately. With alcohol my moderation has always been no more than 1 week, and at the cost of around-the-clock mental obsession about the next time I would be allowed to have my 1 or 2 daily drinks. I know marijuana hasn't been proven to be physically addictive, and I doubt it is, but people who prefer it can still develop a huge psychological dependence on it that interferes with their life, so I stand by this analogy.

Amen to that, 5th. That is perfectly stated. I have tried a myriad of drugs and can take em or leave em. AL, however is on my mind almost daily, in an obsessive way - just like you said.

[Suzanna]

Is Mods really attainable?

I know that I used to smoke marijuana very regularly, actually obsessed about it, even through my pregnancy in 1985. But after having my baby I could leave pot and did not miss it at all. However, after delivery my alcohol cravings came back with a vengence!! I had to really be vigilant about my consumption and continue to be. I have my own rules, do not drink during the day, do not drink on weekdays, do not drink at work, etc.... it is tiresome and sometimes I think AF would be alot easier. Because of my upbringing, which included episodes of parents being total embarrassments while drinking, I swore I would never do that. That alone has helped me maintain my rules, otherwise I am sure I would sink into an abyss... :h Suz

[cowgal]

Is Mods really attainable?

not for me

I just finally figured out that it is not for me, at least not now..................will get AF for A LONG time, at least til our trip to Utah...........that is in about 1 month, last year's trip was WONDERFUL, I was AF the entire time and enjoyed AND REMEMBERED everything!!! WOW, what a concept................

This past weekend, on the other hand (and the last one, in Miami, I don't remember much _

So, just for me I am saying it is at this time in my life not attainable....................this MAY change, esp if my life gets more bearable, but until then AF and HAPPY!!!!:thumbs:

love and hugs!!!:l

MA