July Mod Squad

[ToMyHealth]

July Mod Squad

Whew! Got busy, enjoyed an NA beer with lime on the lanai watching aftermath of thunderstorm, ate dinner - all's well.

LG - yes, imagine having a whole bottle around might be tempting. Maybe enjoy a glass or 2 next time you go out for dinner. We have an open bottle of chardonnay in the frig, more on hand and a full liquor locker. That isn't tempting. I mean if I didn't have any and really wanted some, I'd just go buy some. Heck, living here can do that at the grocery store or drug store probably 24/7.

LG - I started July with goal of being AF entire month. We keep running into friends who say "why???" That doesn't help. I don't use "new posts" tab so I'm not any help.

Today played golf with woman who got married on Sat. Asked if everything went off w/o a hitch. She said well, no, thunderstorm came through just as they were going to have the wedding outdoors, so with a smile she says we just had cocktails, rain stopped and then we got married.

TMH
Day 10 Done

[LibraryGirl]

July Mod Squad

I have four bottles of Smirnoff Ice still in the fridge, lol. Sure I can't tempt someone with that crap? hahaha! My plan so far has been to buy the crappiest AL available, and it does seem to help with the cravings.

I think I might get a bottle of merlot on Friday. It will be a test.

[FarfallaP]

July Mod Squad

Oh, TMH, my de-cluttering tasks were almost always accompanied by a nice glass of gin over ice cubes...trying to tidy up without liquor has been very difficult for me. Congrats on getting it done without the booze!

And, the social questions...that's one big reason I stick with modding, as I'm not really prepared to deal with that, yet. However, there ARE people in our social circle who refer to their health...one woman maintains AL aggravates her allergies/asthma; one man refers to his diabetes; several other women simply say, "I don't drink."

When I WAS on antibiotics in May and stuck to AF drinks, no one even batted an eyelash when I said that, but I personally DID feel that "something missing" which I think Library Girl referred to a while back. So, I am still a work in progress." FF

[LibraryGirl]

July Mod Squad

I think I was having a bad day, FF, when I started that "something's missing" thread, lol. I have a touch of depression, plus hormones are whack right now. If I'm to moderate successfully, AL cannot be the "missing" link, because it is only to be used to enhance, not to obliterate, nor fill every need.

Hi Stewarts! Thanks for the welcome. Sorry I missed you earlier.:hallo: How was the weekend with your friend? Did you say you were at your beach house? Nice!

[Stewarts]

July Mod Squad

My weekend was good, thanks for asking. I did drink a little too much. When I say that, I mean I went over my limits where I start to feel anxiety the next day. Although, Saturday, by the time I got back to my boat I was pretty drunk, but passed out right when I got to bed. I didn't realize it until she told me the next day, so of course the anxiety kicked in. She kept saying, "you were being so cute, i don't know what your stressing about?" She doesn't get it.

She's been not going to work becaue of an HR issue (done to her, not the violator) so she hasn't had to go to work. She wanted to meet up again on Monday, which I did and went over my wine limit. She dragged me another bar and ordered me a beer. I didn't even come close to finisihing it, I left her there because I had work. She woke up seriously hungover. I told her when she gets back to working (Thursday) she'll be back into a routine and that I'll we watch for both of us.

We were supposed to go out to dinner last night, but she asked if we could just stay at my place and order in, I was fine with it. No alcohol for either of us. I was starting to worry that this one might be a bad influence on me, but I think it will all be fine.

[LibraryGirl]

July Mod Squad

Sounds serious, Stewarts. Is she staying with you all week? Good job on having an AF night last night. I can see how easy it would be to overindulge if my partner drank. He does, rarely, but only once in a blue moon, and never very much. I think he would be fine to never drink again, and I know he never thinks about AL at all. Lucky him.

4 days AF for me, since the one day last week. We have rented a little cabin on the river for Sat. afternoon, night, and I think I will bring a bottle of wine. I'm looking forward to it. Not the wine, but the cabin, lol.

At home now, and eating a bowl of homemade granola. It is so delicious! I hope everyone had a great day/night.

[Stewarts]

July Mod Squad

SHe has her own place. She's also Irish, and not to play stereotypes, but I think its why she can back the booze away. I have noticed they, she does drink slow. She is also in fabulous shape no matter what she eats or drinks (she actually doesn't much - don't you hate those people).

As for serious, I don't know. She is married, but separated. I am as well, but I signed my divorced papers last October and my ex has been out of the picture for about a year and half now. I can't see her going back to her husband, and if she does, he is the biggest loser for taking her back. They don't live together, but do still go to therapy and give themselves a "date" night every few weeks or so, which is him paying for dinner and not getting the benefits of it....I kind of feel bad for him.... But I've been down this road before, so I know how difficult it can be for people to move-on, even if they know its the right thing, its still tough.

I'd bring the bottle of wine if I were you. Sitting on the porch of the cabin sipping some in sounds nice.

I'm seeing her tonight, low key, really not sure if I'm drinking or not, if I do, its like A beer or two. We're going to a place not too far way from where I live.

[ToMyHealth]

July Mod Squad

2 days later, still AF. I've figured something out. I use alcohol as a reward and that is what I am missing. The well, I got this and this done today, time to sit down and relax with a glass of wine. Also, dh & I talk A LOT MORE when we drink. So I also miss that. I find myself wanting to get dinner made, eaten & kitchen cleared with mindset of well, let's eat and get it over with. Not nice.

FF - funny story. Bag boy at Publix chastised me at finding a Sweetbay receipt in my bag (I use Flylady reusable grocery bags). I explained about the Taste of Inspirations AF wine. He directed me to a lady who goes shopping once/week for any customers to get what they don't carry. They get it, call you same day. Not only that but rain was threatening so as I come out of market there is a carryout boy with an umbrella willing to keep your groceries dry while you go get your car and he will load trunk for you. Unbelievable. How you doing?

LG- nice getaway to look forward to on the weekend. We are going with 2 other couples to Happy Hour & dinner Friday. So funny when lady responded by voicemail "well, we'll probably go up early, don't know if you're still on the wagon........." I mean they say it kindly but with a chuckle. On the 4th at this big party the husband told about his parents - father an alcoholic but didn't die from it, died happy. Mother died in her 80's, slipped and fell down a few stairs just before getting ready to host a party AND SHE HAD NOT BEEN DRINKING.

Stewart's - Life after divorce. Remember it well. After a long time AF (drank the night after having run NY Marathon in 1988 after 9 months off - it was planned) ran it again in 1990 and met a guy from MN who I started dating, but then met someone else in 1992; we ran Napa Valley marathon 3 years in a row and during that time switched from hard liquor to wine, mostly chardonnay. Maybe the Napa wineries had an influence! Now in retirement we (different guy and my husband) will have a JD once in awhile but it's mostly wine. Have fun tonite.

Ok, off to watch 1st day of PGA after playing 18 holes of golf, dr. appt, Costco run. Tonic water here I come. Oh yay ;.)

TMH
Day 11 Done, Soon to be Day 12

[LibraryGirl]

July Mod Squad

Stewarts, isn't it funny how when you get to a certain age, all the "available" single people are still slightly "unavailable"? That is, separated, going through a divorce, just broke off with a gf/bf, still not quite single...However, if you don't get them at that stage, they're not "single" anymore. LOL

TMH, congrats on 11 days. You seem to be the master of your domain. I do get the part about the reward of AL. It does seem less ceremonial...dinner, relaxing, etc. without it. My bf never really did drink with me, and I miss that about my ex-hub--the talking, relaxing over dinner, drinks part. I am grateful too, in a lot of ways, because it's not as tempting to drink alone.

Well, I made it through the working week, and looking forward to a long, relaxing weekend.

LG

[Trixiebelle]

July Mod Squad

Hi Guys,

Haven't fallen off the edge of the world, just have my daughters here with me. Modding well I'm pleased to say, will check in when I have more time.

Hope you're all doing well.

[Sarasmiles]

July Mod Squad

Hello Modders,
I haven't been to MWO for a long time. I used to post regularly on the Mod Squad thread, then decided at one point (well, many points) to give it up altogether, and spent a little time on AF Daily. I've been back and forth about this issue for years, and I'm sick of it! I know that the simplest way to put an end to it would be to just commit to abstinence for good. Then maybe I could eventually let it go and stop obsessing.

The thing is, I haven't been drunk in two and a half years. I haven't had a hangover in all that time. Ten months of that I was AF, and then started cautiously testing the waters again. Dangerous, yes, but so far not a disaster. Last week I was on vacation with my extended family and I had two glasses of wine every day, until the last day, when I had four, over a several hour stretch. That's the most I've had in two and a half years.

Anyway, I guess I am having another go at "moderation" and would love the support of a thread like this. It sounds like some of you are committing to AF days or weeks and I think that's the way to go for me, too. I know that to have to be here, planning and monitoring, is evidence that I am NOT a "normal" drinker. I suspect it will never be natural to me to just have a drink now and then and not think about it much. Some of that is my personality...I am a bit of a worrier; very self-observant and conscious of my every move. Plus, alcohol abuse is part of my past...several "over-do" episodes a year for many years. But now I once again undertake a plan...

No more than 6 drinks a week, total
No more than 2 drinks on any given day

This week so far:

Monday:none
Tuesday:none
Wednesday:two
Thursdayne

I have to say I feel guilty when I drink...even if it's only one or two. I have had so many years of angst over this issue...committing to abstinence at times, so that when I drink, even moderately, it scares me. Still, it is so hard to just give it up entirely, as I am sure you all know. It's especially hard because I don't feel 100% clear that it's "necessary". I seem to be able to control it now. But will it be worth it to have to think about it so much? And will I continue to be able to control it? That's why I need to be here, alongside you all while I find out.

Thanks for listening!
Sara

[ToMyHealth]

July Mod Squad

Sara :welcome: Have read your post 3X and hear your struggle yet get that you haven't been in "over-do" mode for a long time. Were you happy (happier) when you were AF? Looks to me like you're controlling it very well.

LB - have a wonderful weekend at the cabin. Savor the moments. I picture serene moments, a good book, a little wine.............

Trix - wondered where you went. How old are your daughters? Do enjoy your time with them and see you back soon.

Friday the 13th and starting Day 13. Feel greater resolve again in this AF feat. Dh is having yet another root canal this a.m. He told his golfing friend who we are having Happy Hour/dinner with tonite that his dentist may prescribe JD "for medicinal purposes". And that's fine if he chooses to drink; right now I feel pretty strong in that I can go out tonite, have a good time yet stick with NA beer or tonic water.

Lila, MM, pretty Brit girl, Eve - miss you. Hope everything is well!

TMH

[Sarasmiles]

July Mod Squad

Thanks for the welcome, TMH! That's a good question, was I happier when I was AF? In some ways, yes. I was more at peace with myself. I had more mental space for thinking about other things. I felt proud. Every day I woke up and felt glad I hadn't had a drink the night before. It gave me the feeling that I could manage just about anything; work, kids, home, exercise...because I knew I'd never be buzzed, and I'd never be hungover.

On the other hand, I felt resentful that my husband had a drink or two every day. I found that annoying. I didn't want to be judgmental, but I found it hard not to be. I often didn't enjoy gatherings with people who were drinking. My mother and sister both love wine, and I felt left out when I was with them and they were having a few glasses together. I guess I never fully resolved all of that. I really believe that if I were in a different stage of this problem...finding I simply couldn't limit the number of drinks I had, often going over a planned amount, doing "high risk" things or waking up with hangovers, I would continue to pursue the AF path. I would work on all the things I've mentioned that get in the way. But the nagging thought that maybe I can drink moderately comes back to me again and again. Maybe in a month, or a year, I'll be saying, "nope. Couldn't do it. I've got to give it up." But I guess that's not where I am right now.

You sound like you've got a good plan for tonight. Are you doing the month AF?

Looking forward to getting to know all of you!

Sara

[FarfallaP]

July Mod Squad

Hi to everybody, and a big Welcome to Sara!

Interesting that simply by logging on here, we are all showing a desire to take good care of ourselves, which I think is admirable. However, I must confess that sometimes the somewhat constant "thinking about my ISSUE" gets pretty tedious...I wish it would all go away!

And yet, in the big scheme of things, for those of us fortunate to be here, it is not a life or death issue, so really I should not complain...btw, TMH, it IS those long, relaxing "reward" cocktail hours & wine-fueled suppers which I have loved over the years, and which is my downfall...I did not want them to stop!

And, that of course led to not remembering my evenings, broken wine glasses, odd bruises from bumping into coffee tables, etc. etc. Which is why my at-home cocktail hours had to end. Yes, now dinner is a bit on the "let's get it over with" end of the spectrum. But, my ultra-sounds are good, which is the most impt. thing.

And thanks for the info on Publix! I will check it out! Do not know when we will return to Florida...family duties are keeping us west of the Mississippi.

Stewarts, your life sounds busy and complicated to me...good luck with keeping it all sorted out!

Have a good weekend, guys! FF

[FarfallaP]

July Mod Squad

PS. Library Girl, I really enjoy your signature "tag lines"...FF