July Mod Squad

[Trixiebelle]

July Mod Squad

Vlivengood, isn't it a fantastic feeling when you have total recall and feel great the next day.

Congrats to you and it sounds like your hubby was pretty pleased too :kissyface::naughtfeet:
Hahahahaha

[vlivengood]

July Mod Squad

Toats! Still gunna try my hardest to skip that store today, hopefully the pretty decent feeling I am having this morning will keep me motivated Hope everyone has a great day!

[ToMyHealth]

July Mod Squad

Hi guys & gals~ quite a mix we are getting here. And I remember the days when there were maybe 3-5 people "talking". Like it as we can help and learn from each other.

Sara - sounds like AF is best path for you. Admire your decision.

MM - Well, hi there! Lots of vacas. Welcome back.

Vlivengood - way to cut down! Becoming aware is so much part of the battle if one wants to call it that.

Trix - on/off wagon - at least we aren't drunk or even buzzed everyday. I'm in AF days here now, more than likely until the weekend. Might have a non-alcoholic beer tonite but know it will not be the real thing.

TMH

[vlivengood]

July Mod Squad

Quitten time is fastly approaching gunna keep revisiting a thread I found on what I hate about drinking and hopefully help remind myself and NOT STOP AT STORE

[LibraryGirl]

July Mod Squad

Hello to All. 4 days AF this week so far. I have not imbibed since my trip on Saturday, and have not been tempted. I have wine and beer in my fridge, but so far so good on ignoring. Plan on making iced coffees when I get home, and I look forward to that.

I'm not sure what happened exactly in the Nest, but it seems I'm being accused of everything from leading Newbies astray with thoughts of drinking, to making long-term abstainers defend their right to not drink. It's so ridiculous, it borders on insane.:H:H

Once and for all, I have made a decision to NOT post in the Nest.

[vlivengood]

July Mod Squad

LG you are addicted to posting in the nest, you said yesterday you were done ha everyone is just on edge and sensitive. Off work in 1 hour and just don't know that my good brain will win over my bad brain about stopping but I think for sure I can buy less like last night

[DfromCT]

July Mod Squad

Chased out of the NN by K9

I know I'll get a bunch of private messages from folks that think I shouldn't post this, but I'm going to paste the reply I DID NOT POST in the Newbie thread out of respect for the true newbies (like me!!) I don't want to risk scaring anyone that needs help away from MWO entirely. That being said, K9 thinks she owns the Newbie thread, and wants to exclude anyone that mentions drinking. So here's the not posted farewell, I'm sure my anger comes through loud and clear!

LillyE;1351376 wrote: Dave,
I thought about this all a bit more last night and realized that I could see how it could be frustrating for people who came to MWO specifically because of the moderation focus of its philosophy. To be honest, I have not read the book and I have not delved into the founding philosophy. I came here because I was seeking support and solidarity with others with drinking problems and MWO had the most attractive and intelligent people?

But seriously, it was the people that attracted me here, not the philosophy, so I can see how if it was the former, then coming here and feeling shouted down about attempts to moderate would be disheartening. Lilly x

Lilly, you cannot believe how accurate that quote is. I came to MWO specifically because I thought it offered an alternative to quitting forever, and I hoped (and still hope, but have fears) that I could moderate after a period of abstinence. Instead I've recently been attacked, by a person who continuously claims that she has no agenda other than helping people that are trying to go alcohol free. I'm trying to go AF for at least 30 days, probably more. But I made the mistake of sharing the fact that it's a precursor to an attempt to moderate, and OMG what a sin that admission has turned into.

I'm done with the nest. I got a lot of support here, and enjoyed and appreciated that support. I won't let her get me down enough to break my string of AF days. At the same time, I'm getting more urges from reading her attacks than I am from my own day to day life and my body craving what I've cut off. I'm on day 11, and have faced quite a few challenges more difficult than the dog lover can throw at me.

It's funny that someone that has been on MWO for two and half years and posted over 33 HUNDRED times feels like she needs to control the content and quality of a thread labelled THE NEWBIES NEST. I'm still abstaining, and nobody, including LG has ever told me that I should try moderation in lieu of abstinence. My goal was to go 30 days AF and then evaluate. That hasn't changed. What has changed is the fact that I'll be posting elsewhere, where it's ok to discuss fears of failing at moderation, or even try moderating without getting attacked. If you want to follow me and criticize my posts in another thread, be my guest, but I'll be using the ignore feature there, too.

Ironic that back when I first started posting all of 10 days ago, I got a couple of private messages warning me not to talk about moderation in the Nest because I would be attacked for doing so. I thought to myself "who would be so petty as to attack someone for posting about moderation when the MWO program was designed by someone that was all about moderation in lieu of abstinence?"

I know that most posts were supportive and giving heartfelt advise, and I appreciated it all. I don't know why or where K9 all of the sudden feels that she is in a position to "have to DEFEND being alcohol free." I never saw any posts attacking anyone for being AF, but I have felt attacked for sharing fears of moderation and talking about moderation in the newbie nest which she proclaimed to be strictly for abstainers.

K9, I'm sorry if you feel that anyone that moderates or tries to moderate doesn't need a forum. I'm also sorry you're so short sighted that you think people that are moderating shouldn't be posting, especially when MWO was started (not to the exclusion of abstainers) by someone that thought she had a great program to control drinking without stopping while minimizing withdrawl sympotoms.

So you win, K9. You've chased me from here. I guess you prove the point that newbies might be scared off by all of this argueing, I think I qualify as a newbie, and you've run me off. I can almost hear you saying "don't let the door hit your ass on the way out."

Thank you to all that offered advise. As I've said many, many times, I listened and considered all of it, even that which I didn't agree with. I also would invite those of you that shun folks for trying to moderate to kiss my royal :moon:

[LibraryGirl]

July Mod Squad

Well said D. I hate that this has turned into a "us or them" type of thing. I counted some of the people who have been the nastiest, as some of my closest friends on here. The comment that was said (paraphrasing here): what is moderating? getting drunk 5 days a week instead of 7? was low and uncalled for. Yep, I agree that I would not need this forum if that were my goal. Well, one thing that has come out of this is the fact that you cannot communicate effectively over the internet, lol.

Sorry, if Dave and I are hogging up the Mod thread with our angst, but telling it to my bf who knows nothing about this site just isn't helping at all.

LG

[LibraryGirl]

July Mod Squad

vlivengood;1351703 wrote: LG you are addicted to posting in the nest, you said yesterday you were done ha everyone is just on edge and sensitive. Off work in 1 hour and just don't know that my good brain will win over my bad brain about stopping but I think for sure I can buy less like last night

LOL, it is kinda funny, if you're not involved. I just have a problem with people putting words in my mouth that I never said. I have to bite my tongue (fingers?) to keep from replying again in the Nest. As D said, it's not helpful to newbies, and that is the main concern.

[Trixiebelle]

July Mod Squad

Haha Dave, I find it all a bit amusing watching from the sidelines, sorry if that offends you, but really it's quite petty of such people to carry on that way, don't you think. I think you did the right thing, you were never going to stand a chance in the NN when others have those attitudes.

On the other hand, what we face daily is serious - though I have found that the more I focus on how much I should not be drinking, the worse I become. That's just me, others cope differently.

With my slip up the other day (which does disappoint me) I am trying to take the "oh well, today is another day" approach to avoid the massive anxiety that is faced when I fall off the wagon - it's such a bitch.:hitme:

Sometimes I am successful and other times I'm not - but on the whole we do have to pick ourselves up and forge ahead.

I believe I can speak for everyone is this thread that we are not small minded in that way and you are free to do whatever you wish, whether it be AF or moderation. After all, that's why we're here - to not be judgmental towards others, isn't that what we all hate of "normal drinkers".

If it were any other way, I for one, would be outta here!!!

[K9Lover]

July Mod Squad

Dave (is that your name?)

I don't even know who you are.

I think my track record speaks for itself in that I have been nothing but supportive and helpful to newbies and oldies alike. If blasting me on a thread that I am NOT PART OF makes you feel happy, then by all means, be my guest. Oh wait, I don't "own" this thread, you don't need my permission.

My comments were in general, not directed at you....I've never even given you or your comments a second thought...until now. First and last time for everything I guess.

Take care,

K9Lover

[Trixiebelle]

July Mod Squad

Ok, time out everyone.

Lets get back to what's important.

[vlivengood]

July Mod Squad

Wahoooooooo!!!!!!!!!! Passed up liquor store!!!!!!! Stopped at mini mart for 6 pack of bud select 55..... I know that may not mean alot to most of you but I feel my demon was the liquor!!! Not the beer..... I am soooo excited! Thanks for all the support!

[finallydone]

July Mod Squad

So I will speak here and this will be the last time I ever do. If you think can moderate good for you. I will however not take it lightly when someone calls out K9 for people thinking she rules the Newbie Nest. Number one she doesn't and number two she has always been the most helpful and loving person there along with many others. Attacking a person in MWO is not only wrong but shows that you have no respect for others. And this is me telling you DfromCT. K9's track record is nothing but stellar and for you to try to tarnish her reputation is not only cowardly it is downright wrong. I for one am grateful for the newbies nest and the friends I have made there. Sometimes people can't handle the hard truth and facts. You sir are that person. If you don't like the nest than don't be there. But try to soil a person who has more than likely saved lives by her posting and comfort towards new people to me is demeaning and wrecks what this place is for.

[Notorious]

July Mod Squad

Wow....

This is only my personal thought...

I'm just a newcomer to this site having found it in an internet search on how to "safely detox" from alcohol use, I joined & posted yesterday on the Just Starting Out? forum after spending a while lurking around the boards and decided that this place may be a place of help and support.

I did receive a few responses in my thread and I appreciate them. Then i went to the Newbies Nest and quickly discovered the spat and what that particular forum was all about. Abstinence. So then I find this Moderation (which is my goal at present) forum and the spat continues here?

I realize that in human dynamics "it is what it is" but come on guys. You ought to either kiss and make up or agree to disagree & let it go. Or both.