November Mod Squad

[nonamegirl]

November Mod Squad

Happy Sunday evening, my dear friends.
This is usually the time I would be pouring a glass of wine... it is a good thing to not be. Thanks for the happy words of encouragement, Emmy Lou! It is really kind of exciting - though I know it will get difficult later.

Crocus, I am glad you brought up C.S. Lewis. He has long been one of my favorites, too. A really good movie based on his meeting and then losing his young wife is Shadowlands. It is very healing, if you can heal through your tears.

TMH, it sounds like you have a very busy week coming up. Good luck with handling it all! I hope that you will find some balm for your soul in it all.

Talk to you tomorrow!

[ToMyHealth]

November Mod Squad

Hi, Sunday eve here. Ended up drinking tonight, but not too much. Had a horrible golf game yest so dh helped me with short game today. Yest shot a 109 (Yikes) and today shot a 95! We had fun, in fact, I beat him and he was good humored about it.

Thanks, NNG, I still think about her a lot. And I will for some time. Funeral is Thurs. Obit says he was 48. That is only 2 yr older than my son!

Watched Billy Graham tonite. His 95th b.d. Message. It was on before but can't stay awake til 10p.

Well, good night.

TMH

[crocus]

November Mod Squad

Happy Monday to my wonderful new friends.

Emmylou...how are you? A little rhyme, there.
Lasha - I am so sorry tho hear that you too are grieving. You will be on my mind now, too.
On a lighter note, I'm curious to know if you too have heard of Jake Bugg...He is big in the UK.

Stewarts - Do you run in the cold weather too?

TMH-Nice going on the golf course. It sounds like your drinks were well within the moderation domain. Great!

RC, TMH and NNG - I have read" Mere Christianity" so many times, my copy(ies) are dog-eared and annotated. I pick it up, read a bit, and put it down all the time.
I did see "Shadowlands" about the loss of his wife. His book, "A Grief Observed" is his very sparsely and beautifully written diary in the year following her death. I've read most everything he has written. He is remarkable. "Screwtape Letters" is another short, funny, and profound book. And speaking of Screwtape (the CEO of hell),.....

today I finally have a bit of success to report! Took a shot at one of my demons last night, and won! Score? Demon -24,638, ME: -1.
Made a nice dinner for me and D., and served in the kitchen...(we usually eat in front of the TV; that is D's preference). Hoped for some dinner table talk...didn't happen. Total words from D. during the entire meal..."Do you like it?" and "I'm going to get some more chicken." and finally "Didn't I just tell you that?" ...in spite of my best tries at conversation.
I cleaned the kitchen up while he had seconds, then joined him in front of the TV. I had poured myself a carefully measured rum and coke and intended to drink it for comfort. BUt I didn't. I poured it out, went up to my office and worked til 8:30, went to bed, and read my book until 1:15a.m.

I did NOT stay up all night nursing some wine and going full throttle 'til dawn!!!!!

I had taken a collection of quotes by C.S. Lewis to church with me and had read something about proper enjoyment of alcohol. He had reminded me that I have not been praying to be abstinent, I was praying to be moderate. To be temperate. It stayed with me when I needed it last night. Feeling very good today about my little victory. Going to try to STOP blaming my husband for my own weakness.

Love to you all. Mondays are always AF for me.

[Emmy Lou]

November Mod Squad

Oh well done Crocus! When you do good things for yourself you will be naturally happier!
I am yet again exhausted but happy as I've gotten one out if two jobs finished today. 3 more days of long hours then I'm off to a seaside film festival for a long weekend with a girlfriend.
Goodnight all,
X Em

[Stewarts]

November Mod Squad

Crocus, I'll run in the cold weather. It's starting to get kind of cold here now. Although, the older I get the more these things bother me, like weather, pain, etc.

I did drink some on Saturday. I had a hockey game and had some beers after that... I couldn't sleep so I went to the bar across the street for few more. Nothing terribly bad or to opine about.

I had a brunch date on Sunday, there was no AL for either of us. My Sunday was quite relaxing actually. I did have a hard time sleeping and feel a little tired today, but I'll be ok.

I need to start reading Carr's book again...My life just feels a little out of sorts, it could be because the marathon is over.

Oh, Crocus, I will do a 4 miler in a week or so and I'm debating about signing up for this 15K in September.

I don't know, my Monday just feels...weird today.

j.

[nonamegirl]

November Mod Squad

Morning, All!

Happy morning, happy Monday to my friends.
Stewarts, I know you know that there is always that almost-depression after a marathon. You certainly can allow yourself some time to get back to normal. Bit by bit. Slowly. Breathe. Know that I am sending you strong thoughts that your week goes well.

Crocus, I am so very proud of you! You had a really good time with your husband watching the movie, planned and followed through on dinner at the table (always a victory, in my mind... we also usually sit in front of the tv) and even though he didn't participate in the conversation, you did your own part. You deserve a big hug :l ! And for pouring out the run coke, good girl. Even though you didn't have to, as you had measured it and all, if it wasn't what felt right at the time you certainly made the right decision.

Emmy! Congrats on finishing one more job on your long list! I can't wait to hear about the film festival. You are so busy. My heavenly days, it makes me tired just thinking about all you do.

TMH, I get such a kick hearing about your golf games. I never have met someone who really enjoyed golf... seems everyone always complains about it. Must be a love/hate relationship, I guess.

I have enjoyed my first two evenings and the following mornings AF. Though it hasn't been unheard of recently for me to go a day or two AF, my days in the past two months of drinking one, two or more glasses of wine have definitely increased, and as Crocus says, we aren't praying for abstinence, rather moderation. It is most assuredly time for me to get a big handle on the moderation. I am enjoying the process. Of course I know I will have difficult days ahead when I promise to be AF and don't want to be, but step by step in the right direction will get me there.

Now to another morning of painting shelves in the basement. It is going to be gorgeous!

[ToMyHealth]

November Mod Squad

Stewarts, the best analogy for a marathon is childbirth. The anticipation, 9 months & training. The pain, labor and the 6 miles after the 20 mile marker. The joy, a new life & crossing the finish line. The Post Partum Blues and the post marathon letdown. Hope it passes soon, betting it will.

Crocus, nice going last night. Your decision to pour it out just makes you stronger. I was actually done drinking, had had dinner and went in to take a shower. Dh shows up with 2 plastic glasses of wine as he Ithought I had said I was taking a bath and brought me the wine to sip and he would keep me company. It's hard to get mad about such a nice gesture as I have at times enjoyed a glass of wine while taking a bubble bath. But.....guess I'll have to announce being done with alcohol.

NNG, odd you say that about enjoying golf because that is what people would say about all the years I ran. Ah, you never see a runner smiling. Watch me! Agree with you on the mod handle. Do you already feel better? Those few days in a row I had AF last week I noticed better skin but was disappointed in not having brighter eyes. That is a huge motivator for me. I can usually tell a person is a nondrinker by their eyes. Maybe this will be the week!

Em, seaside film festival sounds like a blast. Bet you are looking forward to some R&R.

Heading over for my workout. Bright sunny day here in Paradise. alm:

TMH

[Emmy Lou]

November Mod Squad

Seaside film Fest will be great fun. Too many opportunities to drink but I've made sure I have booked 10am films on both mornings, I've paid for them so I won't want to miss out due to a hangover! The first night is the biggest worry. We open with a film about a local surfing legend, Wayne Lynch...then a VIP party (which he is also attending) at the 5star hotel...free booze and buffet. I'll just have to pace myself, maybe I can water down my drink when it gets half way?
Gotta start work now!
X

[nonamegirl]

November Mod Squad

Hi, everyone!
Emmy, I have to tell you that in my own experience, I am better off not having even a bit of a drink, if I want to not get into the free booze bar. You seem to be much stronger than I am, but there you go. On second thought, I guess I don't do too badly in public, as I hate the whole thought of acting like a fool, but even so, I do better not starting. And I am in total amazement of you and Crocus being able to build a weak drink.... I'd rather not bother. Ah, well. I do wish I could come with you to the festival! What fun!

TMH, the runners in my little running/biking town all smile. You should see them! It is an amazing group. We also have a really big contingent of golfers, too, who are currently celebrating, as one of the oldest, most favorite courses is being saved when it had been scheduled to be plowed up.

I am feeling quite good today, my 4th day AF. Slept well last night, and so far no wicked cravings. All is well!

[ToMyHealth]

November Mod Squad

Good for you on 4 days NNG! Went by fast, huh. I'm beginning to think I jinx myself when I come on here & post what I plan to do rather than posting the day after what I actually did. Last night perfect example. Bet there were 150 people at the party, 98% drinking. You just get caught up and I can see why the abbers threads warn against putting yourself in that situation, esp. In the early days. Ended up having 3 wines. Feel absolutely fine today, in fact went for a 5 mi walk outdoors enjoying the beautiful day.

Well, going to do some pantry and closet straightening, find a smoothie recipe to include both protein powder and coconut oil, and then bike up to practice putting. Looking forward to a nice ribeye steak tonight.

Make it a good day!
TMH

[Stewarts]

November Mod Squad

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7FdWPeHFAMk[/video]]

For the Lou Reed fans.

[Emmy Lou]

November Mod Squad

Hi there.
Yes NNG I've been finding lately that I slow down even more when I mix weak drinks because I don't get as much enjoyment out of them...so sometimes if it's that or nothing...I choose nothing! Not having my favourites in the house is for me, just like not having any alcohol in the house, for an abber. If I don't have scotch or Shiraz then I guess I'm just indifferent to what IS there.
TMH 3 wines is not much at all for a party. My Doc thinks that 2 or 3 drinks in an evening is within the safe medical guidelines as long as you have at least 3 AF days per week as well. I think for our VIP party I will not put myself under the pressure of a limit. What I will do is start with the first as late as possible into the evening. That shouldn't be so difficult as there is a film to watch, then Q&A, then opening night speeches. I'll nibble on the buffet and drink water. It's in a hotel function room so they'll want us out of there by 12. I think I'll manage to go slow and if I end up only drinking 3 wines I'll be very happy. It will be more of a trial to resist my vivacious friend who is the organiser. He leads such an extravagant life, always celebrating and seizing the moment, with a drink in hand...I can just see his disappointment when I no longer want champagne and bloody Mary's for breakfast!
Oh well, now I must get up and focus on a day of hand sewing...
I guess it's goodnight for most of you out there, sweet dreams all,
X
Em

[RingingCedars]

November Mod Squad

Hi there Modders...had an unexpected party happen in the house I live in now. Drank more than I've allowed myself for some time which amounted to a bottle and half of wine and a rum and coke. It was fun dancing and just being silly with the girls but I did not feel so great Sunday. I've had to reflect a bit on the irony that it was easy to isolate and fall into a dark hole I filled with alcohol but then it was also easier to isolate and climb out of that hole. Now that I am in a shared housing situation I will have to be more vigilant than if I had been living alone. I've also moved into "wine country" and there are at least 3 wineries complete with tasting and retail facilities just on the 5 minute trip to the little town to grocery shop.
TMH I also do not like to set myself up for disappointment with rigid goals, hence the I did not drink yesterday thread.
Keep hitting those sober days all and always be ready to re-evaluate.
Thanks for the Lou Reed hit Stewarts.

[nonamegirl]

November Mod Squad

Morning, all...
I am sitting here with a cat on my lap and a cup of coffee at hand, house is quiet and husband still in bed. All is well.

Mmmm... TMH, how was that steak? I have friends who are vegans, and I simply can't imagine it. I am a meat girl. I can go for days without it, but eventually I am going to have to have that big juicy hunk of meat. Rare and yummy. And congrats on sticking to the three glasses at the party. It sounds like you were disappointed in yourself, but really, that is good.

Emmy, a day of hand sewing sounds like hard work but fun hard work, know what I mean? Too bad we couldn't get together and make it a "quilting party" like they used to do in the old days. I would love to have someone to knit with. That quiet handwork and time to talk just sounds lovely to me. We are probably making the boys in our group yawn and start falling asleep.

So, to move on, Lasha, how is your remodel going? I'd like to hear more about it. Our basement is coming right along... this week we start the last wall - the workbench. Too many treasures have to be saved so we aren't going to clean it all out, just paint above, behind, below, and scrub what we can. Next on the agenda is to make curtains to cover some of the openings, cushions and benches... get my craft corner set up. Had a great idea to paint the inside of the doors with blackboard paint so I can doodle ideas.

RingingCedars, it must be a challenge to live with other adults after living alone. Good and bad parts to it, no doubt. The party sounded like fun! Ahhh, we are all susceptible to that wild hare, aren't we? I appreciate your "I didn't drink yesterday" thread, but don't post on the abbers boards anymore, as I have been bitten by some harsh remarks there in the past. But it is a good idea.

I have started re-learning piano. So far, knitting and now piano. In two weeks I have made really good progress with a program that encourages playing by ear, something I never learned in the 12 years of lessons when I was a kid. Such fun.

Yesterday my husband said, "Now, I don't want to make you mad, but I want to tell you something. Since we haven't been having our nightly drinks, you are much brighter and happier in the morning. I see a difference." To be honest, I did bristle a bit, as I am always up first, always have the coffee ready and I THOUGHT I had been pretty chipper and ... you know, ... together, each morning. Turns out I wasn't, as much as I had thought. And this is at a time when for the most part (not always, but for the most part) I really wasn't over-doing it much. At least I thought I wasn't. Here's what I think was happening, to be brutally honest with you all, my friends, and honest with myself. I think that once I had had the second glass of wine, I wasn't paying all that dang much attention to how much more I was sneaking. Somehow in my little pea-brain I was rationalizing that since I was home and safe, it was okay. I still intend to practice modding. But I hear Emmy when she says "at least three AF days a week." For me, probably need more than that. If it ends up that I need to abstain, I'll go there. But YOU, my friends, are stuck with me. This is the place I want to be.

Rereading this post, it seems to be all about me, and that isn't what I want. Stewarts, how are you, my friend? Any improvement in the mood? Take it slow, go to some restorative yoga classes and enjoy not training for a bit.

Eve, how are you? Due date is coming up, isn't it? Even though you aren't posting much, you are still in our thoughts.

Crocus, I MISS you! Your sweet, gentle posts about church, and dancing and your kids... are you okay?

Happy Wednesday, my friends. :l:h

[Stewarts]

November Mod Squad

NNG, it's funny how when we don't drink, we're better people and feel better. Last time I went through a 30 day AF stint, I felt amazing.

So, I met up with some friends had a few beers then had to go to business thing..had a beer or two there, then went out with some people for one...I then wanted to leave, so I left, but stopped by this bar near me and had a few more, don't know why, and played some music.

I feel fine today, a little groggy, but a little bad about myself...I think its that post marathon depression still as one of you pointed out...it's probably why I stayed out even...anyway...