No Fools April Mod Squad

[Emmy Lou]

No Fools April Mod Squad

So here I am again. I went to an amazing music festival over Easter, even though it was my boyfriends 50th. I did buy him and his mate tickets to the footy though. And I took him out to dinner last night (VERY EXPENSIVE!!!!) he has booked a club that he usually works at for a party this coming Saturday and as a surprise I've ordered 40 chocolate, coconut & Cherry cupcakes to be baked by a wonderful friend and local legend in the Kitchen. I told her I'm not the kind to play Mother and cut cake so she suggested cupcakes. Now I'm just really worried about how I'm going to manage my stage fright, because how else am I going to get everyone to sing happy birthday??? I'm hopelessly terrified on a microphone!
On another note, I haven't had an AF night since Thursday...but am planning one for tomorrow. Festivals don't lend themselves to being AF...and I've made friends with a cocktail called a Mai Tai. I didn't have a single hangover and was up and about by 8am each morning in any case. I actually went to bed by 10.30 on two nights out of three so I didn't feel so bad.
Thankyou all for still hanging out here,
Take care.
X
Em

[Stewarts]

No Fools April Mod Squad

I had an excellent conversation with an ex-lover I think is a fair statement. A young girl, actually a vendor in my business, who I had a little fling with about 6 months ago...she actually did really like me, but I still had other dramas going on and then she had a bf....who is gone now...

Anyway.... I told her I wanted to talk to her about something, because I did send her some self-deprecating message to, not NEARLY as bad as the ones I sent my ex, but I thought should have a good perspective. I gave her the whole run down, everything up to date, she knew a little bit about it. I asked her how she felt when she got those few messages, he responded that she was very worried, but not mad at me, like d., just very worried. I did admit my message to d., were much worse, but this other friend was like still, even if you sent me worse, I still be worried, but she did understand where my ex was coming from.....she knows my ex was married and the whole story.

I just don't want anyone to remember me as a bad person and in a bad light so my friend, let's call her, M, said, "she doesn't hate you, she needs to be away from you, but she doesn't hate you, and somewhere definitely cares about you." MY ex, d, was a very selfish and narcissistic person, maybe she feels some guilt, but she's trying to hold a marriage together, and this is her defense, this is what M told me. I asked, "why does she just then block my email address?" M then said, "she doesn't want to forget about you, she just doesn't want to see you, or even hear from you to confuse her, or make her feel bad."

I realize this is woman logic, but it makes some sense, especially for a married person - hell, I know married guys that have done similar things....blame the other person to save their marriage....it's a defense mechanism... hell, the two of them have to live with this for the rest of their lives, with each other...I don't... in many ways I'm the lucky one.

I'll admit, I've had a long week and a beer or a glass of wine right now sounds good.

:-)

[-143]

No Fools April Mod Squad

Good job Em!!!!! Glad you enjoyed the festival!!! I'm a vocalist/songwriter.....
You don't have to sing the whole song on the mic.....just sing the first couple of words and let the crowd take over! But once you get started you might surprise yourself and want to continue but allow yourself a smooth way out.... :notes::notes::microphone::microphone::microphone:

[nonamegirl]

No Fools April Mod Squad

Hey, all.
I went to the lake for a couple nights and that's why I haven't posted. But, all is well here and I am happy to be back home. I have no other news, though, but enjoyed reading everything others have sent.

Stewarts, just drop that girl, d, entirely. She doesn't deserve the consideration. Someone is out there who is just right for you, I am sure.

[Stewarts]

No Fools April Mod Squad

HEY NNG, yes, I actually spoke to a friend, ex-lover as I said, which I think made our conversation better because there was some intimacy at one time instead of just a "friend" and she put a lot of things into perspective. You're she doesn't deserve the consideration. She will have to leave the rest of her life with her husband with what she did... something like that never goes away...

I indulged a little bit last night, but feel ok. I have been having a LONG couple of work weeks lately.

[Stewarts]

No Fools April Mod Squad

There was one thing I forget to mention my friend said, because I was feeling a little low this morning, she said, "Tonight, relax and go watch a movie you love and call someone you love." I thought that was good advice...

[-143]

No Fools April Mod Squad

..I'm sipping as I'm writing this....
I'm just so frustrated!!!!! I was planning on drinking this evening but not until my hubby got off at 9pm! But anyway..... my daughter is really being mean and nasty to my grand daughter for a while now.... but now my Gb is being woke up for school crying... coming in the door after school crying cause she keeps messing her hair up in school on purpose and my daughter is hitting her all the time lately! I'm trying to get her to understand that she shouldn't be hitting her all.... the.... time!!!!! There are degrees of discipline!!!! All through the day I'm refereeing!!!! Some of you already know my daughter is 19 and my grand daughter is 4. But now my daughter might be pregnant again by a different guy after having an abortion a few months ago!!!!!! I just don't know what to do!!!! She won't help keep the house clean.......and.... my dog just threw up!!!!!! DAMN!!!!!

[Stewarts]

No Fools April Mod Squad

Wow, 143, you have a lot going on, we all feel for you. I am going to refrain from saying anything about your daughter, but I have a real issue with people who hit children, especially when they are that young...your daughter definitely has some problems...but she is an adult now and needs to grow up. You might need to throw her out of the house...you should definitely take control of her children.

Yesterday I was going to grab a cup of coffee at a place before going to the subway and a woman said to me, we kind of got to the coffee line at the same time, "You go first, you have to go to work, I'm just on mommy duty now," and laughed. I responded, "Actually, that (mommy duty) is more important, I'm sure much more valuable than whatever I am going to do today." Which ended up being this....

and it does involve AL, but hey, it happens in business. I ended up taking this big developer out for lunch, with two other people...it's a very exclusive and expensive sushi restaurant in NYC, he picked it. Anyway, he is ordering soup to nuts, not literally, obviously, but there was two bottle of saki involved, lots of appetizers, desert, of course some of the best sushi on the planet.... so...$700 later. and 2 hours, done. My manager is going to flip when he sees that, but hey, welcome to business in NYC.

Drinking Saki in the afternoon was not in my initial plan for yesterday, but it's ok. I got back to my office a little buzzed, left a little early and slept real good last night.... I think the person we took out wanted to take uber advantage of the free meal coming his way...

j.

P.S. the Saki was 1/2 the bill

[nonamegirl]

No Fools April Mod Squad

Hey, -143... I agree with Stewarts. You may not like what we have to say about the situation with your daughter and grandchild, but it seems very clear that someone needs to make your daughter aware of what she is doing and how it can have permanent, marring effects on her child. Your daughter needs to quit hitting her daughter and if that means you need to call Child Protective Services, you should do that. I am so very sorry for your situation, but it needs to be said. This is a time when someone in your house needs to be the adult - and that may in fact be you. And when abuse is happening, alcohol cannot be a part of the mix. I'm sorry. I hope I don't make you mad with that, but you have to take care of your grandchild and you can't do that with a drink.

I guess, -143, if you didn't want advice you wouldn't have told us about the problems. It sounds so very frustrating and maddening and also pretty scary. I realize that this is the day after, and we don't know how things turned out last night. I hope for the very best for you and your family. And if I made you mad, I do apologize.

On to other things... I continually remind myself about the "rules" for moderating my own drinking. Moderation doesn't mean bingeing on the weekends. It doesn't mean drinking every night, even if it is only two glasses of wine. Moderation means just that - being moderate in our choices. One drink or two only once in awhile. It is a hard choice to make, and being honest with ourselves is always difficult. It may come to pass that some of us, myself included, may have to choose to go completely abstinent. Having a clear and level head is always an attractive option.

I send my very best thoughts and wishes out to all of us. May we all have a beautiful and sane and moderate weekend. Blessings.

[-143]

No Fools April Mod Squad

Thanks Stewarts and Nng......for your thoughts on the matter.
As far as last night..... I didn't get drunk just a little buzzed. I could have drank til the bottle was empty but I told myself one more drink and then bedtime and that's just what I did! A little while ago that would not have happened.... I would have drank til I passed out.

One of the reasons I'm dragging my feet about taking my grand daughter is because when I took her for about 6 months before and her mom was living elsewhere my grand daughter would cry herself to sleep many nights cause she wanted her mom. I just don't want to put her through that again nor myself.... it was heartbreaking!!!!!

I think I'm going to give her a couple of options like going to some parenting classes and counseling and starting her prozac again or I'm going to take my gb!!!! She was diagnosed with depressive disorder a few months ago and was on the psych ward for a week and was doing so much better then she stopped taking her meds. So...we'll see.....

[Stewarts]

No Fools April Mod Squad

moderating...

nonamegirl;1653334 wrote: Hey, -143... I agree with Stewarts. You may not like what we have to say about the situation with your daughter and grandchild, but it seems very clear that someone needs to make your daughter aware of what she is doing and how it can have permanent, marring effects on her child. Your daughter needs to quit hitting her daughter and if that means you need to call Child Protective Services, you should do that. I am so very sorry for your situation, but it needs to be said. This is a time when someone in your house needs to be the adult - and that may in fact be you. And when abuse is happening, alcohol cannot be a part of the mix. I'm sorry. I hope I don't make you mad with that, but you have to take care of your grandchild and you can't do that with a drink.

I guess, -143, if you didn't want advice you wouldn't have told us about the problems. It sounds so very frustrating and maddening and also pretty scary. I realize that this is the day after, and we don't know how things turned out last night. I hope for the very best for you and your family. And if I made you mad, I do apologize.

On to other things... I continually remind myself about the "rules" for moderating my own drinking. Moderation doesn't mean bingeing on the weekends. It doesn't mean drinking every night, even if it is only two glasses of wine. Moderation means just that - being moderate in our choices. One drink or two only once in awhile. It is a hard choice to make, and being honest with ourselves is always difficult. It may come to pass that some of us, myself included, may have to choose to go completely abstinent. Having a clear and level head is always an attractive option.

I send my very best thoughts and wishes out to all of us. May we all have a beautiful and sane and moderate weekend. Blessings.

NNG, it's funny you mentioned that...the last time I kind of binged, and I don't consider yesterday that, but it was a Friday that I went out on. I was very aware of what was going on, I just felt like utter crap the next day. My date for the night even told me she had a really fun time, so I obviously didn't do anything stupid, but still feeling like crap is not fun... that is why I think of quitting...it's hard to predict those mornings/days and when they come it's just miserable.

[nonamegirl]

No Fools April Mod Squad

-143, I am glad that I didn't make you mad. You are dealing with so much.

TMH and I asked another person from the Monthly Moderators board to come down and join us. Welcome, Winterwalk! Hope that enjoy your stay long enough to get to know us. We are a very welcoming bunch down here.

[-143]

No Fools April Mod Squad

Yea....I talked to my daughter and told her that if she didn't get back on her meds and enroll in this parenting class I found for her that I'm going to get custody of my grand daughter and have her court ordered into the class! She didn't argue with me or anything she just agreed to the deal. I gave her until May 1st.

Thanks again guys!!!

[-143]

No Fools April Mod Squad

Well......SHE IS PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!!!

[nonamegirl]

No Fools April Mod Squad

Morning, all. Happy Monday!
-143, I am sorry about your news. It must be very frustrating for you. However, it is great about the parenting class, and perhaps your daughter will really learn some good tools, and also some birth control methods that will help in the future. You shouldn't have to be the one to raise her children. Sad that she is so young, but I know these things happen. Good luck to you!

I hope everyone has a great week. I'm going to be af all this week, and look forward to it.