September Mod Squad

[nonamegirl]

September Mod Squad

Hey, Stewarts, good for you for starting a 30. Can't hurt and might help. I also am working on that sort of thing. I hope that your depression eases - you are in my thoughts my friend.

I have really not gotten used to the new system here. I'd love it if, once I finally find our forum, it could be read from most recent posts to earliest, instead of the other way. I am not really sure that I am going to stay with this. What are you all thinking?

[Stewarts]

September Mod Squad

It's not ideal, but I'll deal with it. I've kept to my not drinking promise. I was out with running friends last night, they all drink, I admit, I was tempted but I just went home early, which was what I wanted to do. I wasn't feeling all that social, and I think my temptation was not for alcohol, but because I was bored.

I'm not sure what is going on with me. But I am definitely not myself and I'm not drinking. It's been 7 days. I even had a good meeting with a movie producer (side investment) and sounded more intelligent than usual, or my thought process was different, maybe that b-school stuff is rubbing off, who knows.

There's a Jewish holiday today and Friday , so I decided to wake up early and drive to Rhode Island, office will be dead. Wish the weather was nicer...

[ToMyHealth]

September Mod Squad

Agree - it is frustrating. Did you see where site is going down on Mon, Oct 3rd for a full week? We are supposed to make sure our email address is correct in our profile as RJ is going to send out a mass email telling us how to change our password.

I've been hanging out a bit over in GD, the Steppers thread. Most do not drink; some do, but are working on it and/or have decided that having a few on Sat. night is working for them. As for me? I go AF for a few days, can't sleep worth sh..., get frustrated and go back to having a few.

Stewart's, gosh you are already 1/4 of the way there for your 30. Good for you! I really need to do that.

NNG, understand your frustration. If you want, we could share emails and catch up with each other now and then. Think about it, and PM me, ok?

TMH

[Stewarts]

September Mod Squad

Well I'm sticking with it today is day 8. It's kind of not that hard, what I'm more concerned about is why I don't feel myself. I find myself obsessing on stupid stuff that I can't get out of my head. For example, I made a new friend, female, and now I'm worried I might have said something too "flirty". Trust me, it was nothing inappropriate or crude, but I had my reception in my office getting in my head that I may be making myself "too available". I haven't tried to make any new plans with her yet, I know she was on vaca for awhile and I'm up in RI right now....but it's very rare, at least for me, I find a person, let alone a female, that is in to the same things as me and that will go on a run with me, or let me go on a run with her, I should say.

The suicidal thoughts have come back. Don't be alarmed, I won't do anything, anyone that has been through this know what it's like, it's like that old Queen song, "Bohemian Rhapsody" which I'm convinced is bases on Camus' the "The Stranger", I don't care what anyone says, including Freddy Mercury, the line, "Momma...I don't want die, sometimes wish I never been born at all."
you
The only thing I feel good going for me is, well, I haven't had a drink in 8 days. I went out with my parents last night to one of my favorite local, or our favorite local seafood places. They asked me if I wanted any wine (because if I said yes, they'd order a bottle, at least). I said, "No." So they just had a glass of Rose each. They are not big drinkers....they definitely know their wine. If people believe in the hereditary thing, the "taste" for it, or the social aspect of it, it does probably come from my mom's side of the family...her father's side, my grandfather, he was the "MAN!" He was a WWII vet and from a big family and they all knew had to have FUN! Some of the pictures are funny...and I can recall having some fun at a few family gatherings...I didn't grow up near those cousins, so I don't have much of a connection to them.

My grandfather, as he got older didn't drink, he couldn't anymore, and was ok with that. He was a creature of routine and habit. I remember when he was limited to three beers a day when I was younger, and he was fine with that. I do know when they (his brothers) were all young they POUNDED! Some of my uncles, really one in particular kept that up. I do however remember when I my grandfather was younger, when he'd drink more...even in the car (I know bad), with my grandmother yelling at him, she was Neapolitan, and extremely LOUD! I thought it was funny, at 5 or 6.

Anyway, I am rambling...

[nonamegirl]

September Mod Squad

Morning, all.
I am starting to get the hang of this new site. I'll stick with it for awhile, anyway.

Stewarts, keep up the good work. You are doing fine, my friend, and it is great that you are doing your 30. (Or even if you don't choose to go that long, that you have done so much! Good for you!)

I have been totally without energy for several days. Think I am fighting off a bug or something. I have been able to keep up my responsibilities, but no extra. However, I slept better last night than I have in awhile, and so hopefully that will give me some oomph for the day.
Good luck everyone. Take care of yourselves.

[Lasha]

September Mod Squad

Hi All,

I really felt like a drink this morning and decided to go on mwo and have been reading all day, I liked the clip from Dr McCarthy who explained how addiction happens and he says it's because of Stress. How al increases Dopamine and creates feelings of pleasure, I knew that anyway but still fell into the trap.

My new job is going well but long 11 hour days (stressful) and come Friday night all I wanted to do was drink and I did about 5 ciders and 1.5 bottles of wine.

Bloody idiot, thank goodness for mwo as I could have carried on Today.

Russell Brands clip on addiction was also very good and he keeps going on about abstinence being the only way, he's probably right but it's not for me.

Lets keep the mod board alive.

Lasha

[guapo]

September Mod Squad

Yeah, abstinence is the only way for some.

For me, educating myself and dealing with this in a rational manner, without relying on self-control, white knuckling, getting through each day, etc. was the ticket.

Drinking urges always go away if you wait it out, that's not self-control, it's a way rational people control all impulses that don't really make sense.

[Stewarts]

September Mod Squad

The stress/dopamine thing is true. It's also why drinking after strenuous physical activity/sports feels so good...there it's both, relaxing and keeping the dopamine going. I played a job jury game Monday night, it was a good one. Anyway, I didn't drink after the game, and I was in this mood I have. We gave parkways in ny state, they were basically designed for darn cars went 35 mph, when people had cars as so luxury and went on the Sunday stroll from the City. Anyway, I'm driving back to the city on one of these, and I'm finding myself downshifting around turns, when I didn't gave to, and breaking 100 mph, quite often in my Beamer out of bordom. I then realized what was going on, I was tryng to jeep the dopamine up...messed up

[nonamegirl]

September Mod Squad

Hey, Lasha, glad to have you back. I miss you when you don't post! Sorry to hear about the stressful job - yuck. Stewarts, too. Work sucks. However, I can not blame work for wanting to over-drink, since I am retired. I just like to drink, and have to deal with the being able to control it. Right now I am af, and have been for awhile, which is the way I like to wake up in the mornings, but this afternoon feels like a bunch of red ants running around under my skin. Sundays have always been my "rest and relax" afternoon. But, here I am with a diet tonic and MWO.

Guapo, I think it was you who some time back suggested a video link that explained alcohol addiction to spouses. I said at the time that I would take time to watch it, and never did, and now can't find the mention. Do you still have the link handy? Or was it someone other than you ... hmmm, can't remember.

We definitely went into deep autumn here. Leaves are falling and it is cool to cold. I love the autumn.

Take care, my friends. If I miss posting before the break next week, know that I will be thinking of each of you and keep you in my heart. Stay strong.

[guapo]

NNG, I don't know the Link, but books about that by Stanton Peele, etc are excellent. moderation manifesto blog is great as well.

How is everyone doing. All good in Guapoland.