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    wednesday 5th september

    Good morning all, working at home today, I am working my arse off this week, can't wait until Friday evening!
    I drank last night, bizarre had lovely evening at friedn's house, got back to mine and OH was there with a couple of peopel drinking wine. Initially I had herbal tea, then I poured myself 1 glass of wine at 10.30 - crazy!
    I'm not too gutted but I've realised one of my triggers, social pressure. No one was pressuring me to drink,they offered but no hassle but I was pressuring myself as I felt I should.
    Anyway, trying not to get down about it/dwell on it.I am aware of a pattern I just need a game plan next time I feel that pressure, ideas anyone. I could also have drank a lot more I poured myself a second glass but realised I didn't want it and poured it and rest of bottle away.
    Anyway lots of work today, gym later and then off to a friend's house where I will need strength not to drink so I may not go in case I convince myself that I have no choice!Maybe it's time to be selfish, would be better to go to the gym and have a sauna maybe?
    one day at a time

    #2
    wednesday 5th september

    Accountable, I am so sorry about your other half's behaviour, I hope you find a way through it.
    one day at a time

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      #3
      wednesday 5th september

      Hi everyone. Bear today's another day and a fresh start. Am on Day 5 and feeling good. Had no cravings yesterday at all even though hubby was home and was drinking wine last night. I know it's a long road ahead of me with plenty of up's and down's and am sure the cravings will kick in. Don't know whats helping at the moment, probably a combination. I am following the programme by the book apart from the topa, the cd's, supplements, exercise, water and of course these boards. I get such a kick each morning going into drink tracker and putting in the 0, sad I know but whatever rocks your boat!!

      Rustop

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        #4
        wednesday 5th september

        Morning bear!

        Now that you have found your trigger you should try ways to avoid them until you get a little stronger. One of my triggers were my "phony-in-laws". When I started my journey I made sure that there was nothing on the calendar for at least a month so I would not jeopardize my first month. I dropped my intense "drinking friends". Although my only slip was due to having too much on my plate (which I now realize is another trigger) and a friend who kept coaxing me to "have a drink" to ease my mind-needless to say-I have dropped this so called friend (who is toxic to my sobriety) and have learned to take things slowly By being selfish you are making this journey easier and on your terms. I say a sauna sounds heavenly! Have a great work out.


        Day off today-if you can call it that. Have to take kids to school & then I have about 2 hrs down time & then pick up my son. During my down time I gotta clean the tadog's home(it's now half tadpole/half frog) and do bills. But I think I'll squeeze in some internet shopping-LOL.

        Have a great AF day everyone.

        Hugs to Account :l and to Kathy:l . Thinking of you guys. You two are very strong ladies in my eyes.


        Hi Rus-we were posting same time. Congrats on 5 days-good job!
        :flower: Change a life; make someone feel important. ................. ........................ ..................... ........................ ................. ....... sigpic

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          #5
          wednesday 5th september

          Lightning quick check in...

          Day 20!! Woo-Hoo!


          MM
          Face your deficiencies and acknowledge them, but do not let them master you. Let them teach you patience, sweetness, insight.

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            #6
            wednesday 5th september

            Hoo Woo MM! LOL. good job!
            :flower: Change a life; make someone feel important. ................. ........................ ..................... ........................ ................. ....... sigpic

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              #7
              wednesday 5th september

              Thanks for the support - I guess I do need to be selfish and prioritise me and my goals.
              It's being with people when I don't feel totally at ease, either with the situation or with the people.

              I have cancelled tonight and I am gyming, saunaing and early nighting after watching DVD - making low fat thai prawn curry so I will have a nice healthy dinner to look forward to.
              I feel pressured to go out tomorrow as well but in addition I need to save money and also there is temptation again - OH's dj night, still he had a DJ night Saturday and I went to that.

              Off to a friend's house Friday and out for a curry on Saturday so weekend should be sociable but chilled and there's more non smokers and less heavy drinkers around then.

              I was debating whether to do mods or abs, posted on monthly moderation - I know that my true goal is abs for 30 days, I'm just not finding it easy.
              Whenever I tried mods before my drinking always ramps up anyway.

              Day 1 again for me, I want to do a clean run of it - am very pleased to not be smoking though - pretty much cold turkey as well.

              Thanks again, this keeps me motivated, I can see my fitness goals and weight loss goals have suffered too because I am not prepared to really put myself first - as well as finding new creative interests.
              The thought of cancelling big social events for a month sounds scary - and it shouldn't!
              That has made me think about where I fit, and what I really want fits in my life
              off to muse, in an inspired kind of way
              one day at a time

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                #8
                wednesday 5th september

                Hi Everyone: I'm just beginning day 58 & couldn't feel better physically. Bear, I can't tell you how many times I slipped in the short time I was w/MWO between April (when I entered MWO) & July 10th (when I had my last drink). I would get a thought about drinking out of nowhere, & that's all I'd need to start up again. When I decided to take sobriety one day at a time, I started to see success. It was difficult in the beginning, but I really don't think about drinking very much now. Take care of yourself & keep coming here. We need you as much as you need us. Mary
                Wisdom, Courage, Strength
                October 3, 2012

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                  #9
                  wednesday 5th september

                  thanks Mary, one day at a time would be good for me - I always tend to focus on my end far away goals and they seem impossible - patience I guess!
                  one day at a time

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                    #10
                    wednesday 5th september

                    That's it-I wake up each day & say "today I choose not to drink". Small plan-small goal. Nothing overwhelming. Hang in there bear-something will click. Congrats on the no smoking.
                    :flower: Change a life; make someone feel important. ................. ........................ ..................... ........................ ................. ....... sigpic

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                      #11
                      wednesday 5th september

                      Happy Wed AB-eroooonies!

                      I think I worked out a wee bit too hard last night after taking too much time off of my workout schedule and I'm paying for it now....yikes. I'll be more sore tomorrow, but I'll take that over a hangover 100 to 1 any day!
                      Bear that's pretty amazing you had one glass only...congrads! there are many doctors that say that's impossible for us to do.
                      Late start for garlic breath...better run,
                      Be well friends.
                      nosce te ipsum
                      (Know Thyself)

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                        #12
                        wednesday 5th september

                        Thanks Breez, I may need to write '1 day at a time' somewhere just for me to see.
                        Some people know I'm stopping drinking but they think it's just cos I'm trying to lose weight, I guess the reasons why are only my business though.
                        thanks for all the support and inspiration
                        one day at a time

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                          #13
                          wednesday 5th september

                          Morning All!

                          Bear, I don't think it is selfish at all to look after yourself first. Who else is going to look after you? If I go to anything social now, I go armed with something AF to drink. I don't leave it to fate. But I spent the first 6 weeks at home. I don't have a busy social calendar, mind you, but it is so much easier when you avoid temptation initially. It can be difficult, but so worth it!

                          Rustop, I don't think it's sad to get a kick out of going into the drink tracker and counting up your zeros. It's one of the things that makes me happy, too, and reminds me of how far I've come. I'd love to see all my time at one time; that would be a real kick.

                          Breez, lucky you to get to clean the tadog's cage! At any rate, I hope you enjoy your "down time" (haha!) Thanks for your kind words to me, but frankly, I have gotten my inspiration from people like you, who have gotten so much AF time in. I figured that I could do it too, darn it! I think that we all strengthen each other.

                          Whoosh! Congrats on 20 days, MM!

                          Bear, it sounds like the whole AF thing has brought up lots to think about. Don't let it make you anxious. I have definitely realized how much I relied on alcohol to lubricate things socially. I'm more shy than I realized. There's many different facets of Bear to get to know. Embrace her! Mary is right too about taking it day by day. If I thought too far ahead, I'd freak out. I've gotten this far by taking it day by day.


                          And hi to you Mary, you wise sage! Congrats on Day 58. You are doing beautifully, and you sound quite happy with yourself!


                          Anyhoo-I have another easy day work wise, so I'm really going to push to get some cleaning up done around here. I really have a nice house, and I'm not doing it justice by letting it be so messy. So onward and upward for me. Maddy is sweet, too. She texted me this morning at 7 am asking me to wish her well on her first Shakespeare (sp?) quiz.


                          Have a great day all!


                          Hugs,:l

                          Kathy
                          AF as of August 5th, 2012

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                            #14
                            wednesday 5th september

                            Pssssst......can I come back in here???........just had a lot on my plate........sorry guys.
                            Happy to be back.....on Day 38.

                            Much love,

                            Starlight Impress x

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                              #15
                              wednesday 5th september

                              Good Lady from Glasgow - good to see you ...wot are you on about?!?! You're part of this furniture!!! Perleeeze!

                              (It seems as if me'n Satori are having UK trouble with any post containing the word ****?!?!? So, trying the above...sorrreee. It's not you!! Sod'em...we'll get to talk to our good friend **** somehow!!)

                              Bear - go for it. I think that is really brill to pour the second away and the bottle...somehow I think you're going in your chosen direction...!

                              Kathy, Deter, Breez, Mary, MM, Rustop and everyone to come...HELLO!

                              Yup, Shakespeare's your man Kathy...sweet of Maddy! Hope she does well.

                              Love till later,

                              Finding - things - out x
                              :heart: c: :heart:
                              "Be patient and gentle with yourself - the magic is in you."

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