SOBERING THOUGHT

[madisonmay]

Hi

I have been coming on this site back and forth, I made 36 days August/Sept then blew it. Then tried again and only got a few days under my belt. During these times my husband, best in the world, has always supported me without any nagging, or I told you so, etc etc.

My husband has just turned 65(I'm 55), and in the UK on the NHS in this area you are given the opportunity to have a test for bowl cancer, must be after a certain age thing. I am very much a prevention is better than cure kind of person, but in his case he is don't want to know kind. We were having a discussion yesterday that he should have this test, which he doesn't want, and my argument was "you are being selfish to me because I want you to live a long life with me, you are very precious to me", his response to me(and I don't blame him for this) is "you are being selfish to me because you are damaging your liver and whatever else by drinking, and I also want you to live a long life with me, because you are the world to me". This really hit home because he doesn't do the guilt trip with me, and has never brought up what drinking could be doing to my health. I am always on at him if he has any problems to have health checks because he is so precious to me, and I want him around for a very long time. He is right, I am being selfish to the person who takes such great care of me. So, my commitment to him is 22nd October 2007 is my first day AF. Wish me luck.

Mary :l

[Guest]

SOBERING THOUGHT

Hi Mary........good to see you.
We all need more than luck to beat the booze, so am sending you loads of love and strength...........all you really need to get through this. You have a good husband.......am sure you`ll do him proud. :l

Starlight Impress x

[madisonmay]

SOBERING THOUGHT

Thanks Starlight, I'm going to need lots of luck, but I am determined to win this time not just for me, but for my hubby.

Mary

[memarcie]

SOBERING THOUGHT

Mary, thanks for sharing that. Keep thinking of that and it will help you on your path to sobriety.

[rob]

SOBERING THOUGHT

Whoa Madison. That must have come as quite a shock coming from a husband who never says anything! Sometimes we need someone to hold the mirror up to us so we can really see what we are doing to ourselves.

Best of luck to you.

[retteacher]

SOBERING THOUGHT

Mary: I'm a little older than you are (62), & I haven't been perfect since I came here in April. However, I've had more success here than I've had in years & years. I too was motivated by health (disease prevention). The older we get the more alcohol effects us. Try the Newbie in Need ODAT (one day at a time) thread. It's great. Good luck! Mary

[july232007]

SOBERING THOUGHT

Mary,

Welcome back. It is good to see you here and for such a good reason. I know that we give up the drink in the end for ourselves first. I've seen that often enough and I expect it is mostly true.

However, your recognition that being selfless toward your husband with your own AF life is a worthy reason to recommit tomorrow. I think that your husband's speaking up in the way he has is about as strong an expression of love as there can be. His measured response to you as you were talking to him about his health demonstates, as you well know, that he needs you to help yourself now. It is an important need that you can fulfill.

October 22 is going to be a great day for you both.

July

[madisonmay]

SOBERING THOUGHT

Thank you all for your responses, it means alot to me. Husbands response was a wake up call, made me think more deeply of what alcohol is doing to my body, which is a good thing. About time after all these years. So heres to the start of 30 days AF, fingers crossed. Hope you all have a good Monday.

Mary :l

[Guest]

SOBERING THOUGHT

Hi Mary,
Just want to wish you all the best for making a start.
If you find it gets tough-going, just keep reading and posting here to get you through, or pop into Chat....there`s usually someone around in chat. You will do this!!!

Starlight Impress x

[madisonmay]

SOBERING THOUGHT

Thanks Starlight

Mary:l

[paula]

SOBERING THOUGHT

I too have been coming to this site for quite some time now, I have struggled and lapsed
after 6 months af, but it's the best Iv'e been in years. I do still worry about the physical
affects, but so far my liver etc. is ok. So good luck Mary.
Paula.

[slightlysuze]

SOBERING THOUGHT

Mary...what a lovely husband you have...no wonder you treasure him (and he you!).

Here's to your determination to have a long and happy life with him......because today you have started to change your health and happiness.....well done!

It isn't easy....but neither is all the misery and ill-health that alcohol brings.....hope to see you here lots if it helps you.....:l

Suze x

[madisonmay]

SOBERING THOUGHT

Thanks Paula, thanks Suze, I will be making many visits, and know there is great support here.

Mary :l