Sunday 2nd December

[fickle]

Hey DG, Rustop, Rob, Determinator, Mary, Suze & Cindi,
Thanks for making me feel welcome!
Am going to bed Sunday night feeling pleased to have completed day 2 AF.
Forgive my short sleepy post..
Am wishing you all a beautiful Sunday morning!
Love:h
Suse

[YoungAtHeart]

Sunday 2nd December

Hey all,

I'm up much earlier than I'd like to be this morning, since my sister and my BIL came to collect her furniture from when she was living with me. If that sounds confusing, it's actually my other sister's hubby who is helping out. Anyway they left at the crack of dawn this morning, so I was up at 6:30 am (ugh!). At any rate, it was a nice, but quite short, visit. My BIL downed a 12-pack of beer, while I drank some AF wine. Boy does he work hard, though.

Hey, Fickle, it's good to see you back. Here's to your success on an AF December, ODAT!

Hi and a wonderful Sunday to all to come later.

Hugs,:l
Kathy

[retteacher]

Sunday 2nd December

Hi Fickle & Kathy: Many thanks for starting this thread. I really like checking in here every day. I'm feeling very strong, I think because I'm just really enjoying the benefits of a sober lifestyle. There's no fear & paranoia. What a gift! I just got in from a walk w/my dog & my friend & her dog. It was so much fun & no residual guilt or physical side effects from drinking. I love this way of living. Does life get complicated? Of course. There are many loved ones in my life, & they don't always do what I'd like (it's not their job to please me). I'm just concentrating on staying AF & enjoying life. Mary

[Doggygirl]

Sunday 2nd December

Hi Fickle an Kathy and Mary! Good to say hello this Sunday morning. It's Day 4 AF for me - yesterday was really rough. Just gotta keep plugging away to get the worst of this behind me. I love the way AF feels, and it's so frustrating to still desire booze, when everything about booze is negative for me. Oh well - ODAT! Have a fabulous Sunday everyone! (or approaching Monday for Fickle?? I'm terrible at time zones...)

DG

[Cinders]

Sunday 2nd December

DG, Rustop, Rob, Determinator, Mary, Suze, Fickle, and Kathy,

Checking in here to say "hi" to all. Getting the outdoor lights up this weekend. At least it isn't too cold here in the south. Glad to be down here rather than where the snow and sleet are falling.

Mary, one thing I did learn about us alcoholic types is that we do like to be in control - and inherently know we can't be - and that part of our recovery and getting well is learning that we simply cannot control everything and everyone, including our loved ones and even sometimes ourselves.

So, all we I can say with absolute certainty is that today, I will not drink!!

Once I realized that I do obsess and worry about my kids and their behaviors and have no control over them, I felt a great sense of relief. (I still worry but I don't feel like I can actually do anything about it.)

Anyway, hope this rambling can give some idea that anyone else out there can use.

Love,
Cindi

[Determinator]

Sunday 2nd December

top of the Sunday Fickle, Mary, Cindy, YAHeart, DoggyG, Reteach and all to join

interesting...control issues indeed. I only struggle to control myself and find it so confounding that although I have great discipline in my life I still struggle with a simple natural chemical.

in the words of Napoleon Hill we are blessed with absolute control over one thing in our lives: our own thoughts and imagination...definately the most important things we could hope to control. So yes indeed I will not drink today.

[YoungAtHeart]

Sunday 2nd December

Cindi, I worry a lot about my daughter. At this point, I am not used to dealing with it with her not being at home. It will take some getting used to, I guess. I know she is drinking some, and I know she is smoking some pot, too. I'm a little worried that it may be more than she is telling me though.
Whatifshegetsinanaccidentandbecomesaparaplegicandr uinstherestof herlifeorflunksoutofschoolbecauseofitOMG!:shocked:

It's hard to keep my head screwed on straight sometimes and remind myself that she is only doing what I did, and likely not nearly as much as I did.

Oh well, life goes on....

Hugs,:l
Kathy

[Cinders]

Sunday 2nd December

Kathy,

:l

It is SOOOO hard to let go, isn't it?

I am quite sure the kids have absolutely no idea that there are really these strings from our hearts connected to them and they just go willy nilly every where jerking our hearts around with them!!

Cindi

[retteacher]

Sunday 2nd December

Cindi & Kathy: Our kids can be our biggest weakness. Mine are 34 & 38, & I still see issues I'd like to control, control, control. Yes, I know control is one of my failings & in the past, one of my biggest triggers. I'm just trying to "Let Go & Let God." I like to believe there is a divine plan for everyone...my kids included. I don't have to be in charge of their lives anymore. I'm trying to get control of mine which up to this point, I wasn't managing very well. Mary

[YoungAtHeart]

Sunday 2nd December

If it's any help, Mary, my Mom has let go a lot (at least in front of me), and she is the best person to talk to, and I'm 51. She's 82. Now if I have an issue, she will just listen, but she'll always say, "I wish I could really help with that, but you'll have to do as you think best." It's really a relief.

It makes me dispair that I'll still be worrying in 20 years! LOL.

Cindi, my daughter was having some "boy problems" a couple of weeks ago, and my heart was aching for her. The answers were so clear to me, but she wasn't seeing them. Ouch! I couldn't really explain to her, because it would have just turned her off at the time.

Ah, our children....the most wonderful and frustrating thing we ever do to ourselves!

Hugs,:l
Kathy

[vinophile]

Sunday 2nd December

Evening All,

I had to jump in here because control is such an issue with me. I always had my kids lives so organized and " in order". Boy, is it tough when they're older and you just can't control things. Kathy, my oldest son is drinking and smoking as well, probably a lot more than he let's on. Much as I love having him home I worry about him so much more when he is home and driving around. I'm sure he's doing the same thing at shcool but out of sight,out of mind. Fortunately I have tended not to drink when he's here so that i can stay up and make sure that he's sober when he arrives home.
Not being able to squelch that worry ( over loss of control) with wine has been of issue to me. I have tried to rationalize that in drinking I'm acting like an arsonist. I set a fire in one area (by drinking) to draw attention away from another problem. Mary, you have been so eloquent about how we have to deal with our issues/problems so that they don't bother us more. It truly feels wonderful when you address your problems head on.... ie... you can't control the behaviors of others.

Thank you all for being here. I really enjoy this daily thread as well as the "inn"

Janet