Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

[slightlysuze]

Morning Lovelies!

Finding.....I'm sorry you're feeling so low - I meant to write last night but felt so tired and dispirited myself that I couldn't think of anything positive to write :hug: Do things look any better this morning? This old English weather doesn't help, does it? When it gets grey and miserable my mood often follows it!:upset: How fantastic that you don't get sidetracked back to alcohol......strong woman!!!!

Hope everyone else is doing ok......I am feeling very distracted by the fast approach of Christmas and it's making me a bit scatty.....I keep checking in here but not posting, so apologies if I seem a bit 'absent' ........:h

Love

Suze x

[Eastender]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

Hi Suze and all to come,

I too hope that Finding feels better today always so positive and strong....

I had a bad night, Teenager problems, someone said earlier "prefer Bamboo shoots up my fingernails" i would go for toes as well!

Anyway had a bottle lof wine last night, managed to stop myself opening a second.... so back on day 1 again today!

Was feeling annoyed and very tearfull this morning but when putting my empty in the recycle bin noted how empty it was looking......
Small hiccup but better than not trying at all!

[go2goal]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

Its just Life..........

Good Morning All -

I've decided its just LIFE - no one here has a problem, we all do - its called LIFE, which is hard, scary, unclear with us, fickle, testing, strange, and then 'weather' is thrown in. And we are humans - also strange, unpredictable, diverse, with amazing, amazing capabilities and full of thoughts. Throw in a bottle of wine and its a blame game. Let's go into this new year finding a way not stop beating ourselves up - life can be hard, drink comes easy - that's it. Period - Next day.

Gotta run - need to go find some of that Christmas cheer,

Go2Goal

[wonderworld]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

Good Morning Suze and Eastender and everyone-

Suze - I hear you on getting scatty with Christmas upon us.
Seems that stress is just "in the air" this tme of year, and it takes conscious effort on my part not to get tweaked by it (all the more challenging as I was born in fully tweaked !). I have antidotes, it's just a matter of using them, you know? I start each day calm and resolved, but things creep up on me...... today is another chance to do better at it.

Eastender - thank you for the post. Way to go on keeping things in perspective.
I had a little revelation yesterday - which is that conflict with loved ones is maybe my biggest drinking trigger. There's something about a tiff with family - even a small one - that REALLY makes me want to drink. It happened to me yesterday, and I really NOTICED it!

G2G - You said a mouthful. It's quite a carnival ride, eh? And you're reminding me of this idea of - are you riding, or is life riding you? Getting a harness on this whole thing (my mind mostly) and riding with confidence and skill, is my permanent life assignment. And yeah, the short term alcohol solution makes it harder in the long run. I think this is why meditation is so helpful to me, though my discipline with it waxes and wanes.

Anyhoo - all is well in wonderworld this morning. Hope everyone else is doing well too.

FMS - more hugs to you dear one :l :l .

wonder xx

[satori]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

wonderworld;235699 wrote: .....edit..... I start each day calm and resolved, but things creep up on me...... today is another chance to do better at it.

Wonder - looks like TWO of us making some sense today!


Hiya Suze, Eastender and Goal - and all to follow.


I hope Finding is feeling OK today - I have not seen her around today yet!

Eastender - I have a couple of these "bamboo shoot inserters" too - being the parent of teenagers is not the easiest job in the world - they know EXACTLY what buttons to push!!

Suze - christmas can also be a rich source of "triggers" for me too - It is going to be interesting!

Wonder - most of these "triggers" are from "interaction" with relatives too!
I will have a full house of relatives this year - all of whom drink!

I an still confident I will stay AF tho' because - I now know I do not have a choice - I just can't drink


Have a great AF or Mod weekends - whatever your plans are, I hope you are all successful.

Love :l

Satori

xxx

[go2goal]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

Hey Wonder - Where did you get that avatar? - I am SO jealous - its fantastico!

About the "Carnival Ride" and who's driving...........

I remember Loretta Lynn, in her movie, "CoalMiner's Daughter", right before her mental 'collapse' on stage - "Doo said to me, 'Loretti honey, you gotta run your own life',.......
'But my life's running me'......."

I need my seatbelt, harness and cra"sh helmet!

G2G

[rob]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

Good Morning INNmates!! Sounds like its time to circle the penguines!! Lots of love and comfort needed for our guests.

Suze- Just as long as you touch down here from time to time with your lovely chocolatly self we'll be happy.

East- Congratulations-you've found one of your big triggers and can now work on strategies to combat it the next time it occurs and you limited your alcohol intake!

G2G-Yep, you've about covered it. Regardless of what we are doing life just keeps happening. It does make a little more sense when you're not drinking.

Wonder- Hmm-really? You, fully tweaked, gosh, what a surprise, are you sure? I'm glad that things are going well for you today.

Hey guys, we need more decorations around here!! I'm still not sure about the big tree, but we've got so much room that we can have put trees in other places, even in your rooms.

How about some trees by the lap pool?


That should make our lifeguard smile!!


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[vinophile]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

Good Day Innmates,

Up,down ,good, bad, we are here at the Inn and therfore trying.Wiping alcohol from our lives involves a great deal of effort and determination. " Just don't pick up that first drink" is certainly important but there is no doubt that eliminating the space that alcohol takes up in our minds requires some introspection and that a tough one at this time of year when we have so many other obligations and duties.
While drinking I could be "present" while really not being present. I could escape emotionally while being present physically. I'm working on that now but it's not easy. We always want the road more travelled. Picking up that glass of wine has always been such a knee-jerk reaction for me. Weekends are tough too. However ,I will not drink today. If I have to lie on the couch with the blanket over my head that's ok.....but I won't drink.

It's nice to be at the Inn!!! Enjoy your day here all.

Janet

[hadenuf]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

Day 4

I've not been around for a long long time. I'm on day 4 after relapsing and being discharged as a day client from a treatment centre. Was feeling very sorry for myself for a few days but I'm determined to not let it get me down too much. Went to the doc today who gave me some very positive feedback. Will be seeing the alcohol team on Monday and then I'll know where I stand as regards more rehab or whether it's back to work for me. Either way I have started on the supplements with avengence. Hopefully I'll be popping in from time to time. :h to everyone on this journey.

[slightlysuze]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

:welcome: Had.....nice to see you here

Hope all goes well on Monday......and have a good weekend here...stay strong for Day 5 and 6 :l


Suze x

[wonderworld]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

Hi All-
G2G - my avatar is a piece by an artist I like called Oksana Badrak.

Hadenuf - good to see you here. Hope you will continue to pop in. Sounds like you've been through the mill. This Inn is alovely place to recuperate.

Rob - I know my tweakedness comes as no surprise to YOU!
Sounds like we're trying to drum up some Christmas spirit...... let's see.....

here's an ornament G2G might like:




Here's the outfit I'm wearing RIGHT NOW:





And if you take the presents off my feet you will see my toes .....




And..... here's a tree we WON'T be having at the Inn :



That one's for the wreck room.

Back a little later!
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[Finding My Self]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

Hello all! Much better today...thank you so much...I am sure it's all your lovely hugs. Sorry to have droned on..... yup, life....where's the harness! Or is it that I try to harness it all; it's meant to be free to give us its joys and gifts and lessons.....except I want to tell it to do it my way....hmmmm! Something to do with that little word, "Trust"??!?! I'd really, really like to...and mostly think I am.....but, kidding myself so often and I've much work to do on that!

Hello to Hadenuf - welcome. I hope you feel better soon.

Today was WINDY!!! But I avoided the BIG showers and we got my daughter's car through its MOT check....(and skirted around the fact that it has to sit outside the garage until tomorrow as I can't drive it home (she is miles away at 'her' theatre company's opening night).......it is so embarrassing. I'm sure the garage owners know....but...just a nother thing to chin-up about and trust!)

Was offered a lift to some Cornish music and dance tonight by David... dithered for ages but it was too late to get in anyway...was just amazed at how it threw me....well, not threw me exactly but just got my brain whirring! How does one know the difference between thinking too much and just going with the flow?!?!?! People say to me all the itme, "Stop thinking so much and just get on with it..." AND "Why didn't you stop and think!??!" AAAAAGH! Is it just me?!?!? Anyways, I was tossing up the wanting to go dancing for me (he would have been at a different part of the event) and not being able to get there any other way and the not getting mixed up with him again....and yet I hate to have 'enemies' - he's not but it's awkward. I guess life pulled at its own harness....we got timed out anyway! So, I cooked my 'specially-bought-healthy-supper and settled for the evening with you guys and the telly.....mmmm! (I found myself being strong about not rushing out anyway with only 20 minutes notice and no supper although he offered to bring me a sandwich.... I needed to eat properly tonight and not rush....always a downfall.....my 'balance' is VERY important to me now....as in, if I'm anywhere near balance - occasionally, if lucky(!) - I feel I deserve to maintain it to the best of my ability. (And also not be with people who will 'mock', question, 'raise-an-eyebrow' or 'told-you-so' me about the last 6 months.....)(and I used to worry that that was paranoid: now I see that it is possibly a healthy response...... (?!))

So, I am here.....and it's lovely!!! THANK YOU!

Have a lovely evening all..... I hope Al stays in his hole.....beast.
FMS xx

[maxman]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

hey all, maxyboy got through his friday af! Its sat morning here! quite pleased with myself, got swimming lessons with the girls this morning and then lots of paperwork this arvo, wearing boardies,tank top and bare feet today! anyone jealous? take care all and thanks for pulling me out of the wreck room earlier in the week.

[vinophile]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

Suze, Glad to see you seem better now.

Hadenuf,welcome back! It.s good to see you again.

FMf, I'm glad you are more chipper. You are such a wonderfully gentle soul. You wrote last Sunday about lighting the first Advent candle on the wreath and that brought me back to my childhood when we would do that every Sunday in Advent. I looked for an Advent wreath but will have to improvise by making one myself. Thank you for reminding me of such a lovely holiday tradition. I guess I should get back to church as well......

Wonder, For sure let's keep that xmas tree in the wreck room!!!! I like your toes though.. Are we not on day 11?????
Max, you really know how to hurt a girl who's freezing in 18 degrees (fahrenheit). Could you blow some warm weather here....I know that would have to be one big breath of air to blow halfway around the planet. I'm glad you folks have great weather. Enjoy it"!!!!!

Ready for bed now. A few twinges of wine wunderlust but it passed thankfully.

Have a great night all.

Janet

[wonderworld]

Friday Dec 7 at The Inn

vinophile;236139 wrote: Ready for bed now. A few twinges of wine wunderlust but it passed thankfully.

Ditto Janet.
Yes, I think you're right about 11. I was thinking 12, but it was a Tuesday for my day 1, so it must be 11. I have to put it in the calendar!

Way to go MAX!!!! Friday's a be-atch!

Love to all and nighty night,
wonder xx