Oh My God

[Accountable for Me]

OK, I have just found out that my biggest hippocrit has an issue. My Nana, which many of you know that I am living with has been swilling the hard stuff for probably quite sometime.

A couple of days ago, I lost my Cross pendant down the drain from cleaning it and we took the plumbing apart.... I noticed NOT ONLY a few nights before that there was a bottle of Vodka underneath the kitchen sink, but now, underneath the bathroom sink empty.

OK.... I also found another stash of hers in a linen closet, and believe you and me that it wasn't there before............. and she gives me shit about my drinking. The only thing I can say is that the Apple Doesn't Fall Far From The Tree.

What in the heeck???? Like common, how dare someone give me so much grief when they are swilling on the sly???

[lushy]

Oh My God

I think the reason she is so hard on you about it is because she sees how it has ruled her life and does not want the same for you. I am constantly talking to my daughter about the importance of eating a low sugar diet (because sugar addiction can be linked to alcohol addiction) and how she should never drink, etc. Talk about the world's biggest hypocrit? That would be me. But it is because I do not want her to go down this path. Try and see it from that viewpoint if you can. I know it is frustrating but I think it also coming from a place of love.

[Flip]

Oh My God

I agree Lushy, she's probably scared out of her (drunken) wits that you will suffer like she is. Cut her some slack and forgive.

[Accountable for Me]

Oh My God

I do forgive, don't get me wrong......... I was just sayiing that holy cripes! Thou shall not judge...........

[Flip]

Oh My God

Have you talked to her about it? She may have a lot of good things to say to you. (unless she's loopy of course!)

[Guest]

Oh My God

Hi AFM,
I agree with the others........your Nana is an old lady who just wants the best out of life for you and your wee girl. She would hate to have history repeating itself.

Starlight Impress x

[Chief]

Oh My God

Yep, she also knows the apple doesn't fall far...she just doesn't know how to talk to you about it...

[meditation mama]

Oh My God

AFM - Yep... agree with everyone, but it must have been a real shocker! I had the same thing happen with my hubby recently. I started finding whiskey bottles. No bid deal because I didn't think he was not drinking, but I did notice they were chenging brands every few days... he had been going through them! it is just shocking when you have to confront the conftonter... are you going to say anything?

MM

[Finding My Self]

Oh My God

Difficult! A bit of a shock...had you any idea?

But, you said it yourself.... "Thou shalt not judge..." Judgement ends in tears - always. Both ways... "Presumption is the mother of all f*** ups"....never presume...ask and discuss....there's something going on for sure but don't presume a thing - the why's, when's, what's....and if she's doing that to you, step aside....f*** ups about presumptions work both ways: don't play! Head up, look AFM in the mirror (coz you can!) and send love to your Nana....

.....and I wish you luck, love and tons of good wishes for the gift of insight!

Hugs FMS xx

[Hannah]

Oh My God

Accountable, I gotta agree - she doesn't know how to tallk to you about it, so doesn't. But her giving you so much "grief" is as close as she can get to talking to you about it.

Hope you can find the right time and place to break down the walls and get some real communication going. Think it would help both of you.

Good luck.

[Finding My Self]

Oh My God

AFM - Hannah's put it so well and I sort of 'muddled the puddle'....sorry!

I was thinking about it....and how rotten it is that we 'hit out' at folk doing exactly what we are doing/want to do?... I guess Nana's doing that in her way...sort of 'jealous' that you've kicked it and she can't?

I hope you manage to talk about OK and things go on ok....

Love and hugs anyway.
FMS xx

[tawnyfrog]

Oh My God

Every time I see one of my little teenage mates light up a smoke, I berate them. I yell and scream and tell them they're bloody stupid. I spare them no vitriol. I give them major shit about their smoking.

I then storm off, leave them to it, go to my room and light up a fag.

Hipocrite? No. Addict - Yes! Sad, angry nicotine addict, despairing at the fact that these kids haven't got a clue how bloody addictive those first furtive dabbles into smoking can become.

Perhaps that's why Nana is the way she is. She knows.... and wants better for you.

[Breez]

Oh My God

Maybe she wants to quit & it's hard for her-yet she doesn't want to drag you into it. Maybe by giving you a hard time she's actually trying to convince herself how bad it is.

Maybe a talk will do you both good.

[trixietrack]

Oh My God

Brez I agree with you . that is typical projection, and I think people who know they have a problem but will not talk about tend to blame others.
like the saying goes, it takes one to know one.

I would be gentle with her

Trix

[vinophile]

Oh My God

AFM,
It must be hard for you and I'm sorry. You know you are on the right path now. I guess the most important thing to remember is that your granddaughter won't be finding empties in your trash can.
Thinking of you.

Janet