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    #1

    My MWO Experience

    It has been almost one year since I've joined MWO. During this year, I've had hundreds (not sure of the exact number) of AF days puctuated by a few slips or short binges. I'm certainly not proud of those mistakes, but my progress here has been nothing short of a miracle for me. Pre-MWO, my drinking pattern was pretty much the opposite. Mostly drinking w/some "recovery" days in between.

    I have seen the alcoholic grip loosen a bit. I don't have automatic drinking thoughts
    -when my husband is out or occupied w/TV sports.
    -when I have chores to do.
    -when I'm out to dinner or at a dinner party w/friends.

    I do still feel vulnerable when I'm stressed, emotional, pressured or tired. Those are the times I come here at read & post. Also, I don't trust myself to have alcohol in the house. I certainly don't feel like I've got this problem drinking solved...maybe I will never feel that way.

    I'm starting a new reading campaign on alcoholism. I find that helps me keep my abstinence goal a top priority. I know that I cannot have any happiness in my life if I drink...& that's not an overstatement.

    Words cannot express my gratitude for all my friends here at MWO...especially all of you here at 30 days abs. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart. Mary
    Wisdom, Courage, Strength
    October 3, 2012
    Tags: None
    #2
    My MWO Experience

    Mary, may I be the first to say - words cannot express my gratitude that you are here, at MWO. Yours were some of the first posts that I read when I joined, and you have always been a fount of wisdom, knowledge and inspiration for me! Together, we are growing..
    The furture lies before you like newly fallen snow - be careful how you tread it, for every step will show.

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      #3
      My MWO Experience

      Mary we joined round about the same time....I could not imagine coming here without you; I always look forward to reading your posts and wonder what "food for thought" you'll give us today. We have both had our run of AF days but I have learnt so much from you......when I slipped I would stop posting and disappear for a few days/weeks but you....you just picked yourself up and tackled day 1 all over again with a renewed determination. As I say, I'm learning from you and many other special people here.

      Thanks Mary.

      Janicexxx
      AF since 9 May 2012
      Quit trying to control something that is uncontrollable (Bear February 08)

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        #4
        My MWO Experience

        Hi Mary

        I second everything Hannah and Janice have said. You have been an inspiration to the rest of us. It's too easy to stay away and continue to drink. You have shown us the way. Like you I have had more AF time in the past year than in the last 20. Long may our journey continue.

        Rustop

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          #5
          My MWO Experience

          Yes, an inspiration you surely are Mary.......
          Miss October :blinkylove:

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            #6
            My MWO Experience

            Mary,

            I joined right after you did. We have watched each other and coaxed each other the whole way.

            I sure am glad you are here with me. :l

            Love,
            Cindi
            AF April 9, 2016

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              #7
              My MWO Experience

              Thank you so much everyone. When I've had slips & mini-binges (not like my pre-MWO days), I knew in my soul that to leave MWO would be my doom. I knew that the longer I stayed away, the more I would drink. I don't think it would take me very long to drink to my former levels. That's why I always try to praise people who come back after a slip. I'm not praising the slip. I'm praising the courage to come back, 'fess up, & begin again. Thank you all for your kind words. I can't tell you how much you all mean to me. I've been feeling kind of emotional lately & actually feel tears in my eyes right now. Love to you all, Mary
              Wisdom, Courage, Strength
              October 3, 2012

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                #8
                My MWO Experience

                Mary~

                First, congratulations on your 60-day milepost. I also joined about a year ago and remember you then. However, I ducked out for the summer pretty much straight away - just too scary for me then. Your personal growth is so noticable and we have watched as you have continually gotten stronger and stronger. Your daily words of wisom are truly inspirations to me and everyone here. You honesty is commendable and noticed. Thank you, Mary!

                Namaste, my friend.

                MM
                Face your deficiencies and acknowledge them, but do not let them master you. Let them teach you patience, sweetness, insight.

                Comment

                  #9
                  My MWO Experience

                  Mary- I think I joined a couple of months before you. I have always benefited from reading your posts. Thanks for sharing so much. I think that one of the huge milestones in making progress, at least for me, is to come back after a slip and be totally honest. That is what used to really hold me back. This place really makes this possible and really holds you up and pushes you along so you don't sink into that deep dark hole. I wanted to say to you also that I have done an extensive amount of reading over the past year and a half on the subject of alcoholism. It has absolutely been an invaluable help. I find it is especially helpful when I am feeling a bit shakey or have slipped up, for some reason. Knowledge is power I think and it really works for me. Just a couple months ago I filled a trash bag with all the books I had bought and read on the subject. I left them all together at a charity book collection spot. Hopefully they can help someone else. Thanks Mary- you are wonderful. Aquamarine
                  NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF YOUR OWN DETERMINATION
                  AF SINCE 3/16/2016

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                    #10
                    My MWO Experience

                    Thanks for your reflections, Mary. You are a treasure to all of us here, even when you've just had a slip, because of your honesty and integrity. Of course, we all love it more when you are happily pursuing your abstinence.

                    You have given us all so much, and truly, Absville is not the same when you're not here on the 30-day threads.

                    Keep up the good work, dear friend. You mean a lot to me.
                    :l :l
                    AF as of August 5th, 2012

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                      #11
                      My MWO Experience

                      Kathy: Thank you so much for your presence & kind, kind words. M
                      Wisdom, Courage, Strength
                      October 3, 2012

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                        #12
                        My MWO Experience

                        Mary,
                        Thank you so much for being here.
                        My husband brought home some lemons the other day and put them in a bowl (he eats lemon juice with eveything). Looking at them gave me this sense of peace. I finally drew the connection. Those lemons reminded me of your avatar!!!!. Wherever those lemons appear I know I will find a feeling of warmth, insight and understanding........talk about Pavlov's dogs!!!!

                        congratulations on 60 days!

                        Janet

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                          #13
                          My MWO Experience

                          Mary, a big fat congratulations to you!
                          roud::wave:
                          *Definition of Insanity: doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result* Albert Einstein

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                            #14
                            My MWO Experience

                            Retteacher - thanks again for your posts. You seem to touch so many of our problems. I too have many AF days, only to fall off the wagon again. It's just so good to know that others do the same, and that it's not the end of the world. We must keep on trying. Like you, I find that a few days AF make me think less about alcohol, but yet at times the urge comes back. I'm fed up of it all, and although I can control for a lot of the time, I think at times that I'll have this problem for ever. Keep on posting. Tylyr

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                              #15
                              My MWO Experience

                              Tylyr: I know it'll get easier and easier as we begin to identify w/being a non-drinker. All those days in between the slips count for quite a lot. When I think about the year I've been here at MWO, I've probably had hundreds of AF days to a comparatively few drinking days. Don't ever, ever get discouraged enough to leave MWO, even for one day. It's the only thing that keeps me from binging at this point in my recovery program. Mary
                              Wisdom, Courage, Strength
                              October 3, 2012

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