Friday 4th April

[Janice]

Well I got my little girl on the train back to Manchester then went to the gym. Lovely having her home for 3 weeks, we're best buddies and I really miss her. My son goes back on Sunday. He's got his finals coming up in May so he's working hard. Its a beautiful day here so going to get out in the garden and prune & feed my roses!! Lovely.

4theboyz hope you're okay after the hernia op?? Have a great Friday everyone, will be back on later.....Janicexxx

[Cinders]

Friday 4th April

Janice,

I love to garden, too, but never have the time with all the traveling. Keeping my fingers crossed I may have one more week at home. Current client, where I am working from home remotely, wants to keep me. I do, however, already have a gig lined up in Kansas City, MO next week. We shall see what my boss wants..

4thboyz, Yes, how did the op go? Hope well, keep it sterile and you will feel better than before!!

I love the feelings I am getting as I get further and further away from my last drunk. My body and my spirit are both feeling stronger. My brain still is trying to "trick" me into the drinking thing, so thank heavens I have the Antabuse to keep me "in check."

I feel guilty in some ways for taking it as a crutch but in others I am so grateful it is there to fall back on.

I have my medi-alert necklace on which tells EMTs if I have an accident. Wouldn't it be awful to have a wreck or accident and be given something with alcohol in it? Yikes!!

Daughter situation is really bad, not just drinking but now starting to worry about her relationship, period. I am thinking there is some serious issues with bf and this is feeding into her problems.

I did have a discussion with hubby about it and he feels she has such low self-esteem and that is hindering her healing. It was interesting to hear him talking about how us alcoholics have such low self-esteem because we are alcoholics (he is right, the guilt and the shame) even though it is simply a chemical dependency caused by differences in brain chemistry. Hmm. I think he gets it. However, he is a "hard" man in that he also truly believes that we do have the choice to drink or not drink, just like a diabetic has a choice to follow their diet advice or not. So, us alkies are "not off the hook" for our disease but responsible for handling our disease.

Geez, in 32 years of marriage, this is probably one of the few things we actually agree on. :H

Hope all that come today to MWO find their way out. I care about each and everyone of you!!

I am on day 18 and know I will make it through because I have already popped my Antabuse.

Love,
Cindi
XVIII

[aquamarine]

Friday 4th April

Hi Everyone- Rainy cold day here.
Cindi- My heart goes out to you with your daughter. The low self esteem issue is such a viscious circle with the alcohol because you begin with low self esteem and then the alcohol comletely makes it worse. Once you don't drink for awhile you can really step back and see this, but it is so hard to make someone actively drinking really understand this. Your daughter is so lucky to have you by your side. Hang in there, saying prayers for you both.
4TheBoyz- Hope you are feeling well and on the mend. Take care of yourself.
Janice- It must be nice to have your kids home. They grow up way too fast ,don't they.
I am so impressed with your discipline with exercising. I know how beneficial that would be. I really have to get myself going.
Hello to everyone to come. Stay Strong and Take Care! Aquamarine

[Cinders]

Friday 4th April

Aqua,

I had an appt yesterday with my GP because I wanted to show her all the meds and get her concurrence. She knows all about me, not just the alcoholism but the gastric bypass and post menopause, etc, so I like her input and want to keep her informed. She also keeps a list of alll drugs and supps I take.

She concurs on my supps and added Vit D because of blood tests showing low Vit D.

She also said, "EXERCISE!!" She said it will be a huge help in dealing with anxiety and help the alcohol cravings as well as improving overall health and well being.

I guess RJ knows what she is talking about!!

It is very heartening to know that my doctor totally approves of RJ's approach. The doctor said our livers are not processing nutrients well because of the alcohol, add that to the fact that when we are actively drinking, we often do not eat well. She thinks the supplements are a fantastic idea.

Thanks RJ for starting me on this path. I am even having a bit of difficulty typing this because my natural nails are growing!!

Love,
Cindi
XVIII

[Beck]

Friday 4th April

Good Morning,

Another cold and raining Friday in Virginia - yesterday we had sleet! Got all my kids' afterschool actys cancelled - so who am I to complain!!! Didn't have to be in 3 places at once.

Good to hear everyone doing so well. Cindi, sorry about your daughter but glad you are taking care of you. Who cares if AB is a crutch? IT WORKS AND YOU ARE WELL.

Janice, I may have to join a gym if the weather doesn't turn around quickly - missing my run. It's great how often you get to your gym.

Aqua, good to hear from you.

hello to all the folks who will come in later = 4tB, Det - Cheer up, CMH3guy - you sound so positive. Janet, yep, you've got to work on those triggers. late afternoon is tough.

My kids are off today which is usually fun - but my moody teenager can bring down everyone's happy or she can be the best of the lot. These unstructured days are the ones I used to drink through. Can't even imagine doing that now.

Off to have another great AF day. Will pop in later,
Beck

[on my way]

Friday 4th April

Good morning all,

Sounds like you?re all on track. Been super busy here, due mostly to kid?s schedules. Day 6 and all is well in the AL dept. It has been good to hear about everyone?s personal triggers and I have given serious thought about mine. I?m making a conscious effort to avoid them or at the very least be acutely aware of them. The running is a serious outlet for me. I have run every day this week, I know that has been the best tool in helping me overcome the stress here this week. It used to be the major hobby focus in my life (before AL). I used to run in a lot of distance races. Maybe that will come again here shortly.

Cindi, I pray that your daughter finds peace in here life, what you?ve done to yours in the last month is an outstanding example for her.

One4theboyz, hope you?re well on the mend!!

Beck, Sorry about the weather, hope it clears up for you. We?ve have had 2 REALLY nice days in a row here. Ran with hubby last night, had him sucking air to keep up. This is good. Hope you can get out today, it really does make a difference. And good luck with the teen?..i can relate, have a couple here too. You never know quite where you stand.

Janice, glad you had such a nice time with your son and daughter, kids are a precious gift.

Aqua, I think you are the number one cheer leader here, Keep up the good work!!

The best to everyone! Lets keep the beast at bay this weekend!

On my way

[4theboyz]

Friday 4th April

Good Morning All!

Thanks for the well wishes - operation went well - (I think!?) Just a belly button hernia which today hurts a bit so I expect to be layed up which really sucks for me since I need to keep busy active. These stranded at home days would be usually enhanced by massive amounts of liquid fun, but I may break out the guitars later after the meds kick in. Speaking of, they really are no fun at all, the vicodin they gave me kept me up throughout the night as I have been spoiled as of late with my AF sound sleep nights. The heavy duty stuff I got for the operation has now wore off so I'm stuck with Ice packs and Ibruprofin. I am ever grateful that I have my lovely friends here to brighten my mood today.

I'm a little scatterbrained right now, as it is hard to concentrate so I will have to catch up with you all later when my head clears.

I did want to thank Cindi for sharing her story as it highlights how important it is to communicate with our loved ones.

Have a great AF day everyone!

[Miss October]

Friday 4th April

Good Morning Friday Abers !!

I have attempted two long thought out posts this morning responding to each and everyone who posted before me, and both times I have been logged out. I will try again later, as I am at work, and I have been on here for one hour. Next time before I "preview it" the I will copy it and past it......frustrating.....

but I will not let this ruin my "AF happiness" today !!

I'll be back.........

[Janice]

Friday 4th April

Miss October, that always happens to me when I do a fairly long post.... usually have to copy and paste it after I've refreshed the page and logged in again. Its so annoying when you've done a really long post and the whole lot disappears!! Janicexxx

[retteacher]

Friday 4th April

Cindi: I too think AB is the best thing you could do for yourself. It's what you've needed to build up some AF days & change those awful patterns that I know so well. As far as Adrienne's issues: My Jimmy has them too. He's used substances for over 20 years to take the place of real soul-searching. He wasn't even a year old when my first husband was killed in Viet Nam. I then married my present husband when he was 3, but it wasn't easy for either of them to adjust. Those are issues he needs to talk about but just won't. He says he hasn't been drinking since his DUI, but he hasn't sought out counseling or AA either. To me, just stopping the drinking isn't going to solve the deeper probs. All we can do, however, is just be there for them. It isn't easy.

As for me: I've been doing OK. I pray daily for the urge to drink to be removed, & that seems to be working pretty well. I don't have a whole lot of real cravings. That said: I won't get complacent or let down my guard for a second.

Take care everyone. Mary

[retteacher]

Friday 4th April

Deter: I just read your post from yesterday. Thank God for Antabuse. Also, what would have been accomplished if you had gotten drunk over job stress (a frequent occurrance for me - in the past)?
-a rotten, guilty feeling about yourself.
-a hangover.
-having to 'fess up to us & trix.
-et. al.

Thank goodness you didn't give in. This too shall pass. When I was working, I tried to remember that it's just my job...not my whole life. Cook something wonderful for yourself.

Mary

[Miss October]

Friday 4th April

Good Morning again all your April Friday Absters,

OK this is going to be somewhat quick. First of all Janice, I'm so happy you and your daughter had a great time together. Enjoy the rest of the week with you son. I am going to hate it when my boys leave......I'm hanging onto them for as long as I can.

Cindi, My prayers are still with you and your daughter. I do agree with what your husband said, that we have the choice to drink or not to drink. He just does not realize the difficulty in that choice. And the longer we have been drinking the more difficult it is as we all know, because we first need to break the habit that brought us to this addiction in the first place. You had mentioned in one of your earlier posts, something you brought back from rehab....you mentioned that they said we have the ability to control our alcoholism, but not the ability to control our drinking (it was something like that).

Last night I took a 2 mile walk with my 12 year old son, and as we were walking he said "Mommy, you seem so happy lately". I said: "In the last few days ?" he said "yes". I told him I have been feeling so much better and my belly does not hurt like it has been". He said the exact same thing to me back in January when I went on a "16 AF stint". Yes, I feel better when I'm AF, so then I am happy. Looks like a good reason to give up the drink.

So today's Friday, always my toughest day, but I'm really in the right mind set for some reason, so I will be real surprised if AL even tries showing up tonight at the witching hour !

So to everyone before me and after me, make it a great day today, and exercise !! Join that gym if you have not already.

[Determinator]

Friday 4th April

Aloha Friday ABeroonies!!!!

ok, chin's up this morning. Back home, AF and feeling very good now.

Cindi, isn't it great to be able to have deep intellectual and emotional discussions with your significant other? it's very important me thinks.

Bozy, hernia? yowie man! hope that clears up ok.

maybe antabuse is a crutch in a manner of speaking but to be honest it really takes guts to take it. especially at first. I literally sat there and stared at the pill bottle for 20 minutes before I brought myself to take one.

I am so utterly grateful to be AF especially at this time in my life when I'm driving so much for work...I just couldn't have done this in 2006....I'd have lost my job for sure.

well, I'm off to save the world and bring garlic to the good girls and boys.

be well friends!

[myra]

Friday 4th April

Hi everyone. You all are amazing. Congrats to all on your success. You have helped me so much. bout to leave to go to the family wedding. Not at all sure I can make it thru without a glass of wine. Oh well. Will let you know. This is the most sober Friday I have had in 3 years. Friday is a huge drinking day for me. I am usually well on my way by now. So far, so good.

Cindi - I wanted to say to you that I'm sorry you are struggling with your daughter. Will keep you in my thoughts. ABOUT THAT CRUTCH THING, don't you think crutches are just great sometimes? You would not feel guilty for using crutches if your leg was broken.

MM - how was your little princess?

Ripple - I have not seen your avatar today yet. Can't wait.

Gotta run get the family married and show off my kids. Love to all

Myra

[retteacher]

Friday 4th April

Ms. Oct: Your son's comments brought tears to my eyes. Remember them the next time (if there is one) you feel tempted. M