Friday 16th May

[cowgal]

Friday 16th May

Friday!!

Still struggling a little, but happy, and determined to beat this, today is hopefully a day 1 for me...............I am started back on Campral, forgot to take (really forgot!) so that may be part of my problem..................

love you all, good luck to all struggling, check in w/ you all on Monday!!!

XOXOXO:l:h:l:h

MA

[retteacher]

Friday 16th May

I'm doing OK right now. I'll beat this addiction if it's the last thing I do!

Mary

PS: I'm sober today...nothing at all in the house.

[retteacher]

Friday 16th May

Thank you all for the support. I can't imagine how I'd be doing wo/everyone here at MWO. M

[vinophile]

Friday 16th May

We are a motley crew here today but so united in our desire to beat this thing. It is tough in that some days just glide by and then other days,just when you think you are in control, you fall right on your but.

I was feeling less than comitted to being AF yesterday. I was feeling sort of pathetic in that I've been here for 2 years and, although I've made progress, i continue to slip back into old habits. Then my husband and I had an argument (over what ,to begin with, I forget) I was really angry. The old me would have immediately opened a bottle feeling justified because of my irritation. However, the me that has been here for two years and knows better understood that the last thing in the world that I needed was alcohol on top of edgy emotions. I would have woken up this morning unfocused, repentant(not because of anything I said or did to my husband but because of drinking) and miserable.

Instead, I slept well, feel focused, and am generally in good spirits. I am still pissed off at my husband, but that's justifiable(I think) and will be dealt with later(hopefully)

So , despite being dissappointed in my inablity to remain totally AF since being here I have made strides, and for that I'm happy.
The weekend will certainly be a challenge for me, and I know many of you. I hope to be able to check-in frequently.

Det,...Congratulations on 100 days!!!!

To everyone else, thanks so much for your posts. Each and everyone of them mean so much to me.

Have a good afternoon and evening.

Janet

[Loppy lugs]

Friday 16th May

Evening folks,

We do all seem to be at different stages in this journey but I think thats nice. The experienced people pitch in with advice to help out us newbies and the newbies remind all the long timers just how far they have come.

You may be pleased to hear that the chirpy me has made a reappearance. The crying stopped as suddenly as it started. This has been a tearfree zone since lunchtime. Don't know where all those emotions came from but I am guessing better out than in.

Hope everyone else who was feeling low is starting to feel better.

Well impressed with those on triple digits bet you've got really bright eyes. I can't get over how different mine look now they are not permanently bloodshot.

Flying know what you mean about going to bed. The brain likes to check out sometimes I'm sure that was why I was so exhausted in the beginning.

Cindi, you continue to be an inspiration to me.

Best of luck Cowgirl

[retteacher]

Friday 16th May

Great going everyone on the milestones you've reached.

You all are a huge motivator for me.

Again, I thank you for your patience.

Mary

[wantrealmeaning]

Friday 16th May

Hi everyone,
I've been very busy recently, everytime I've tried to get online I've been booted off. I managed to post in general today for Bear then when I wanted to come here PC messed up again.
God bless Bear and his family, it's such an awful ironic tragedy, I haven't been able to stop thinking about him and I never even corresponded with him :h.

I'm fine and like you Mohun I'm not sure what day AF I'm on and I think that's a good thing.

I had my last meeting with AL counselor yesterday, now I'm waiting for an appointment with the after care guy. On the 27th March I filled out an assessment form with my counselor, the lower the score the better. For physical I scored 12 and psychological health 32, took the same assessment yesterday got a 2 for physical and 1 for psychological, How fab is that? :wow::yay:
I'm gonna TRY and copy it out in microsoft works and post it in general so everyone can take it, if you don't see it you'll know I'm crap on computers and couldn't figure it out.

Went to my brothers for dinner yesterday and was telling his wife (SIL) about how well I'm feeling not drinking. Both her and my brother like a drink and she told me a while ago that she wanted to stop, recently she went 10days AF . My brother was working late so she opened up to me quite a lot and I was shocked by what she told me about my brothers drinking and his behaviour whilst under the influence. Their children hate it so he has taken to hiding it and drinking out of mugs. I had no idea things were that bad. He hates our dad for his drinking and can't see he's turning out just like him. I'm worried and angry for/with him. I'm angry because he's trying to hide his drinking behind his wifes like she has a bigger problem. She went 10 days AF he went 2. 2 to 3 yrs, my SIL told me it's been like this. I'm gonna have to have a word with him, He's a good man works really hard cooks and mucks in with housework, a good husband and father, he has a lovely family, I not going to let him throw that away. I'll have to think of a subtle plan of action and get some seeds planted in his mind.

Wow, I had no intention of waffling on so much.

Beck, that dream is amazing, I think it's brilliant, definately someone watching over you.

Massive amounts of love and strength to you all :h

Want
xxxx

[july232007]

Friday 16th May

Beck,

Great for you to listen to your dreams. You'll find much release now that you have decided to jump the fence rather than sit on it. An AF life is really easier once you are ready to commit to it. The indecision and uncertainty are what is stressfull, I think.

Vinophile,

Strides are strides. You have intuition on what you want and need to do. Many things you said in some of your posts last July helped me to get serious and focused in my early days AF.

Cindy, Mohun, 4theboyz, Flyin, Loopy, Mary, Cowgirl, Want & Hannah have a great weekend. It is not easy and there are scrapes and scuffs but it is worth it.

Let me relate one story why to me it is worth it to be AF.

Tonight it was a beautiful cool Friday evening in Tennessee. Soft night air perfumed with lilacs, perfect like it so often is in spring in the South. This time last year I would have been well into drinking a few (6,7,8,9,10) beers because I deserved it after a work week. I work hard, I can drink if I want to especially after I have taken care of my job and my family. This is what I thought and did last year and what I did for many, many years.

Tonight, I asked my kids what did they want to do? My wife had to work so I was on my own. Options: local baseball game? movie? run around outside? The kids chose a movie and we saw tonight's new release Prince Caspian. It was great, we had a wonderful time and we stayed out late for us 11:00 pm.

The point being that the options were all available because I was sober. I was available because I was sober. The kids lives were a priortiy because I was sober. And, I could help out while my wife had to work because I was sober.

Had it been earlier years I know I would have been resentful of my wife working because I would have been cheated of my deserved me (read drinking) time. I would have avoided asking the kids what they wanted to do because I would have been tired from work (read drinking time). I would have done whatever I did with a glow of alcohol and a dash of guilt.


So, to close it out. My way out has given me a new and better life. A clean life that is AF. A life that does not miss the drinking and one that has room for what is most important. Living your life directly with those you love: a little boy in your lap, a little girl holding your hand and popcorn to go around in the dark. Let the movie begin.

Have a good weekend friends,

July,

Day 295 AF

[DogLvr]

Friday 16th May

Gosh - a lot of powerful postings today. I echo what others have already said
1) Congratulations to everyone who is trying to become AF
2) I'm scared about waffling into the moderation world - and equally scared about saying I can never have another glass of wine.
3) Thanks to everyone who posts here - this has been a Godsend for me - as I know it is helping keep me focused on this AF goal!


July232007 - Wow - that was a great post. I am feeling nervous now - I am on day 16 and tested myself pretty hard this week - stuck in an airport for extra time tonight - and I would usually have had a beer, wine, martini - you name it - but stuck w/my cranberry and soda.

Last night I went to this big food and wine event - didn't even realize it was a wine tasting - so my friends were quite confused when I was only drinking sprite - Although - once again I loved waking up early today to no hangover!

I hope everyone has a fun and safe weekend - I just got to Florida - so I'm going to try to see a nice sunset tomorrow night - sans vino!