Friday 16th May

[Loppy lugs]

Morning all,

Sorry still got a bad case of the weepies, don't know when my chirpy self will come back but I miss her.

So hoping everyone is still conquering the beast and pressing forward with their AF days.

I know some people have had a few hiccups but from the sound of the boards yesterday everyone seemed renewed with the desire to keep trying.

There was something DT said yesterday about telling your loved ones how you feel about them that really stuck a chord.

I have now lost both my parents Dad in Sept 01 and Mum in Mar 06. Over the years there were so many things left unsaid but as a family we never said goodbye or put down a phone without saying "love you Mum/Dad/Sis/Princess/etc." It now gives me great comfort to know that whatever our last conversations were about, and obviously I never expected that to be my last one so it was probably about something mundane. I know that the last thing I ever told them was that I loved them.

Anyway, onwards and upwards another day beckons. What is also strange is that although I feel truy rubbish and would normally have been dying for a drink, It doesn't seem like a solution at all. Now if I can only hold onto that thought.....

[Mohun]

Friday 16th May

I am slipping in here on a late Thursday evening. I believe it is 36 days AF now and counting. I hope everyone is doing well. Thanks for all of your support.

Have a great day.

Mo.

[Loppy lugs]

Friday 16th May

Well done Mohun on 36 days and all your very apt posts.

Sleep well.

[flyinhigh]

Friday 16th May

Good Morning all
Mo- congrats on beginning to lose count of your number....i hear that part is the good part of the journey and you have entered a new plane of abstaining. Way to go!

Loppy- i also look forward to your cheerful self to return, but remember to just try to love yourself in all the different phases of this journey. I have found some days I am so grouchy and I don't understand why. I just go to bed then so no one has to deal with me....especially myself!

Well, I am getting ready for another weekend....it is going to be rainy here, so I am planning on movies....good food and some tile shopping (I am getting ready to redo my bathroom, what fun!) I hope everyone else has a good plan for whatever AL has up his sleeve!!!

Well, good day to all who post past this and congrats wherever you are on your journey! ODAT and let this one be sober!!!! Thank you again to all!

xo
flyin

[retteacher]

Friday 16th May

Hi Everyone:

I just read the post about Bear. How very sad. In March, my son was arrested for a DUI & has been attending classes & aa meetings. Thank God he didn't do anything to himself or anybody else.

As for me: I'm struggling once again. I know someday I'll get this AF thing. I'm starting again today. That's all I can do.

Mary

[4theboyz]

Friday 16th May

Good Morning Abbers!!!

I purposefully put 3 exclamation points on the Abbers today since we seem to really need a little extra ooomph in our day today and also to say great job MO who seems to really be on a roll and I as well with day 5 starting in great form.

Another whole night of sleep for me is a good sign that things should be going a bit smoother I just have to find a way to take my mind off of AL when home at night, but no one said this was easy!

I also believe in my heart that hose who pass on most certainly would want us still here to carry on and make the most of our God given days and that is what I intend to do today and especially this weekend. I wish you all a very great AF day today. Stay strong everyone!!!

[Cinders]

Friday 16th May

Good morning everyone,

I am so happy for those who are doing well and sending hugs and support to those who are struggling (((Mary))).

I am so incredibly grateful I got my Antabuse back last Friday because if I had not, I would have gotten drunk a couple of times this week. The urges were incredibly strong.

I ended up going to AA every night this week here in Columbus. It is a small group that meets at 10:00 pm every night, 365 days a year. They helped me, too. Last night the discussion was about three things: Spirituality, Acceptance, and Codependence. It was fascinating to hear everyones different views of each of these. I enjoyed the discussion immensely. One of the old timers had a wonderful talk about it. I think that is what I love about AA, some of those who have been sober for many years can give us so much wisdom on how to win this battle.

I am definitely taking this one day at a time and at the same time determined to beat this tussle with my brain. I do not care how long it takes. If I go to my death bed wanting to drink, I want to know I still will not drink!!

Anyway, enough about me.

Please, everyone, have a safe, happy Friday and remember we are all here for each other.

Love,
Cindi

[Beck]

Friday 16th May

Acceptance

Well, Many seem to be having a tough go of it today...I'm going to share my good news...

Most of you know that I have been struggling to stay AF. Had that mod thought lurking in my head and always giving me a tough time after meeting a milestone.

Before bed last night I decided I would mod in June. Guess I thought I had to know for sure. Felt a bit better though still uneasy and went to sleep. Had the most vivid dream. I'll try to relay it...driving along in my car and I hit a patch of ice...try desperately to control where the car is going and stop the car. Finally I hit a mailbox which stops the car. But I have to re-park (I don't know why) and I go through this whole scenario over and over. I get more upset each time. I'm literally standing on the brakes but can't get the damned car to stop until it careens into a something. I look around and notice that most others are having no trouble driving - but some folks' cars are much more beat up than mine. By the end of the dream I'm literally sobbing in fear and frustration and know that I'm going to move the car again. When I awoke, I almost yelled out loud. I F@CKING GET IT.

When drinking I am literally trying to drive on ice. My life has no traction, I just slide along out of control, going nowhere in particular and causing damage.

So I am off the fence and truly happy about it. I'm going to build on all the good things I've created in these 100+ days of sobriety rather than place them in jeopardy.

I used to be apprehensive about the notion of remaining AF - now I am excited by my future. Traction is good!!!

Much love and peace,
Beck

[retteacher]

Friday 16th May

Cindi: Your sharing was so inspirational. Thank you for your support. I'm not giving up. Mary

PS: Kathy, congrats on 11 months. Hopefully someday I'll be where you are.

[Cinders]

Friday 16th May

Beck,

What an incredibly powerful dream. Thank you for sharing.

Love,
Cindi

[Lila]

Friday 16th May

Good morning all,
It is Day 17 for me. I wish you all well. I am a little crabby too this morning. I overslept a little. I am having smaller mundane cravings. Because I am worried about stuff.
I havae to run, but take care everyone!
Lila

[Janice]

Friday 16th May

Hi everyone.....just a quick one think its day 80 today. Looking forward to the weekend and catching up with myself - maybe a bit more time on MWO!!!.....its been a busy week workwise and emotionally. Has anyone heard from Want....haven't seen her on the boards the last couple of days???

Janicexxx

[YoungAtHeart]

Friday 16th May

Thank you for all the congrats, everyone. I really appreciate it, and I'm looking forward to becoming a solar orbiter. If I can do it, anyone can! It just might take a number of tries, just like it did for me.

Sorry that you're feeling less than cheerful, Loppy. You'll feel better soon.

Great job on 36 days, Mohun. When you start losing track of days, they really start to add up!

Flyin' you sound like you have a productive weekend ahead. I admire your energy...can you send me some?? I hope you enjoy your weekend, and here's to an AF one for you too.

Mary, you have what it takes, I know it. I have faith in you. One day, you WILL BE where I am.

4TB, I know that Bear would definitely want us to carry on with our AF plans and to keep on trying, no matter what stage we are at. If I recall, I don't think he got it right away, either.

Here's to Antabuse, Cindi. I am happy that it is helping you to stay strong. If you wrote about Adrienne's wedding, I missed it. It sounds like your AA group is one of the really good ones.

Beck, I just love your dream! I'm glad it gave you the message that you needed and that you feel more at peace now. It's amazing that out subconscious mind knows what we need, even when out conscious mind might be trying to rationalize our way out of it, isn't it? Anyway, good work!

Have a good day, Lila. If you were drinking you would be worrying about that.

Maddy comes home from college Monday. That will be her mess plus my mess. I feel overwhelmed just thinking about it. Anyhow onward and upward. I'm still thinking of our Bear....

Oh, we were cross posting, Janice. I think I saw a post or two from Want on the General thread or in Subscribers in the last day or so. Happy Day 80!

[Determinator]

Friday 16th May

Aloha Friday ABeroonies!!

Mary sorry your having a rough go. Next time you feel down try to pm me and we'll chat ok?

Cindi, love the resolve in your words this morning

YAH nice to 'see' you here

Beck, what an amazing dream. very interesting.

Lila, nice chatting with you recently

TODAY I'M AT DAY 100 WOOOOOOOO !! .
my record is 104 days. when I get there this time I'll be on vacation. going to be a challenge but I'm ready to do battle.

big hugs to each and every one of the crew!!!! (that's everybody ok?)

be well friends

[Beck]

Friday 16th May

Congrats Det!!! Right behind me. And now that I won't be modding we'll chug along in this happy fashion.

And I knew it was dangerous to invite everyone into my psyche

YAH, I actually thought that my (since abandoned) decision to mod in June was entirely rational.

Mary, feel better. You can PM me as well.

Beck