I started out with a very specific reason for wanting the 14 days at this point in time ? now that I?ve booked the flights it?ll have to be 20 days, at least. I?ve been drinking in response to stress for a long time, increasingly so after my dad was diagnosed with an incurable illness a few years ago. The last couple of times I?ve gone to visit him, I?ve drunk myself silly every night. I can?t moderate around him and his situation. So my choices during those visits are either to drink, get more anxious and worry him or to abstain altogether. I opted for the latter this time and thought I?d best get cracking before the trip. I feel really encouraged to have the first AF week under my belt (yay!), and hopefully the physical detox is done. But the psychological one is just beginning. I?m an emotional drinker, I?m heading for Trigger City in a few days and I don?t actually see the stress letting up for quite a while.
I had intended to write an intro blurb in the Starting Out section, but after this first week, a few things have happened. I?m feeling more fragile and, selfish though this sounds, think I need to park myself firmly in an abstinent corner of this wonderful website with maybe initially just a subset of all the people who are on MWO. I?m also starting to think past 14 or 20 days to an abstinent month, or summer, or beyond. I hope to build up my energy to be able, in time, to offer others the positive support I?ve seen on these boards. Meanwhile, I?ll just try to hang in there and stay the course with all of you, one day at a time. Thanks for listening! :thanks:
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