What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

[cpn1004]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

Lost-Cause,
We have all been there. It does suck. There is a way out.

[spacebebe01]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

I hate the years of life wasted

I hate the hurt and pain caused to my children

I hate the thought that I could have died

I hate the total obsession that consumes me so the only thing that matters to me is alcohol

....................

[akgirl]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

I hated not remembering the night before.

[Want to Stop]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

So many things.

I hate the person I become. I hate how it makes me a mean person when I would never treat people that way sober.
I hate the money I have wasted. I hate the periods of time I can not recollect. I hate the way I have made my family and friends feel. I hate that it destroys my self-esteem and makes me hate myself.
I hate that it makes my depression worse. I hate the burn in my stomach that reminds me I have done it yet again...

[jennyneric]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

I hate that I think I'm having so much fun when I do it and I hate when I realize the next day that I wasn't really that fun, I just thought it was at the time. I hate the way it makes me lie to myself. I hate that it's so hard to stop doing it. I hate that my kids look to see if I'm drinking. I hate that when I drink is the only time I smile. Why is that the only time I smile?

[Sprat]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

To start? I hate that i'm drinking now

Hello everyone,

First post. Great thread I read 10 pages last night before bed, sober, and i'm reading more now while drinking. Last night i even made this my home page, but that didn't work for today.

I feel for so many things that have been said.

I hate having to have al with me, picking up a pint before any event outside my house and sticking it in my bag, just to be sure. My security blanket.

And then drinking it in a stinking bathroom shithole while i go to 'pee'.

And thinking i shouldn't just be drunk in the afternoon- i should do be getting something done, and the next day wondering how many store owners, Kinkos, sales clerks, etc. knew I was hammered.

And as was said many times, spreading my buying around. I live in Japan, so as an outsider, with a taste for Jim Beam, it gets pretty obvious. I have about 6 or 7 convenience stores within 20 minutes by bike and its a pain to remember the order.

Anyway, good luck to everyone. Hope to be back here soon.

Sprat :new:

[mondmobil]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

I love this hatred-thread!

Thanks to all of you who posted here, yesterday I was on the verge of buying a bottle of wine but when I started reading this thread I stayed at home with my cup of tea..

Where I live it is midday and I failed to stay abstinent already. Yesterday was day 8 of me staying sober and I just hate it that I failed! So I wish to all of you that today you will be strong, stronger than me, and here is my personal list of the things I loathe about alcohol (starting with my experiences of today)

1. I hate waking up and thinking about AL first thing in the morning
2. I hate not being able to think about anything but AL the whole noon
3. I hate me trying hard to find reasons why it is ok to drink
4. I hate that I am afraid of going to the supermarket because seeing all the bottles makes it so much harder
5. I hate choosing the wine not because of its taste but because of its permille of alcohol in it (the more the better of course)
6. I hate that while drinking I am fearfully watching the amount of wine that is left in the bottle and the fear it won't be enough to get me through the day
7. I hate that one bottle is never enough
8. I hate that five years ago, one bottle of wine made me feel like dying the day after and today I don't even get headaches
9. I hate that when I want to buy another bottle of wine in the supermarket I also buy ridiculous things like birthday candles and gift wrap paper to pretend it's a party I need the alcohol for (anyone need some? I have got loads already...)
10. I hate that in the evenings when shops are closed I am walking to the gas station for more (filling station attendant knows me well - even though I don't have a car..)
11. I hate that I can drink nearly everyone under the table
12. I hate that my hands are so swollen that my wedding ring does not fit anymore
13. I hate the burst veins in my face
14. I hate that I passed out one night and slept with an old buddy who I don't even find attractive and that I don't remember a thing about it
15. I hate the scar on my chin which I got when drunk
16. I hate the remorse, the self-hatred, the loss of control
17. I hate that I don't seem to know when (and how) to stop
18. I hate the "day after" when I am not able to do a thing

so many more, maybe some day this list will be continued, but right now I just feel like the biggest sh* on earth...

thanks for this thread! even though it did not help today, it helped yesterday and for that I am grateful..

love, mondmobil

[mondmobil]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

@ sprat: Hello! I am new here myself, and I wish you just the best! I think I know (at least a bit) how you felt yesterday, because your yesterday is my today...

keep reading and posting, this is one great forum, nobody is judging you, really great!

I am thinking about Japan a lot these days (because of the catastrophe of Fukushima of course but also about the economic crisis) life's not fair!

love, mondmobil

[sunshinetoday]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

I hate:
-how swollen my face gets
-the disappointment and sadness I create for those who love me
-the lack of memories for all the "great times" I was having
-the hiding, sneaking, ridding, lying, self loathing cycle
-heart palpitations
-hospital visits
-fear and anxiety
-lying to myself
-using it as an emotional pain killer
-more was never enough
-havng al poisening then getting out of hospital and drinking first thing
-being smart enough to know better but ending up at this point in the road anyways
-the trust I lost

This isn't even the tip of the ice berg. Everyday AF there are more realizations of what I hate about AL.
6 weeks and counting AF one moment at a time!

[Doggygirl]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

Congrats on 6 weeks sunshine. That is AWESOME! I can relate to every single point on your list.

DG

[caper564]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

Tiny;337283 wrote: The money I have spent

The weight I have gained

AMEN Tiny.... you hit it..

[Nelz]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

Man, there is really nothing I can add to any of these lists....all so true.

Last night I finally had some cravings......just glad this site is here to take my mind of of AL(crazy, because thats all we talk about is AL LOL)

Love the site, thanks for the valuable info guys/gals

[jennyneric]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

1

[timetochangeforme]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

The wine stains on my lips, teeth and tongue the next morning. The grossness of trying to brush them away.

[ast]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

i hate when my kids ask me about a conversation we had the night before
and i have no clue what they mean.

i hate waking up in the middle of the night to once again throw out the boxof wine in disgust only to buy more the next afternoon.

i hate the way i thought i was fooling everyone in town when i wasnt and how stupid i feel now that i was outed by a good friend

i hate that i embarrassed my family

this is day two of eternity.