What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

[Doggygirl]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

I HATE the selfishness of being a drunk. When will *I* drink. Where will *I* drink. I don't want to participate in X that would be important to *you* because *I* would rather stay home and drink. etc. etc. etc.

DG
Day 49 AF

[Doggygirl]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

:bump:

[CXD863]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

Most have been said before but,

I hated drinking my days off into a stupor(there is so much more out there)
I hated not being in control of my life
I hated the loneliness I felt
I hated wasting all of that money, between the actual booze both at home and especially at bars. Not only that but the pack of cigarettes, all the take out food(I never had time to cook), I would spend $5 on a taxi everyday to take me literally a few blocks which translates into a fifteen minute walk. Even if I didn't drink at a bar I would take a cab to get home quicker so I could start drinking faster.
I hated hating myself

Again so much more I'll stop there

p.s. I put all of these in the past tense because I don't want to see myself as that person anymore.

[A Work in Progress]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

I guess it doesn't matter if we repeat what others have said. The important thing is to get it out in the open, recognize it, own it, and by "it" I mean the REALITY of what alcohol has cost us.

What I hated:

The need to have a supply of breath mints all the time.
The taste of the breath mints interfering with the taste of the whisky.
Recognizing clearly that I was drinking in EXACTLY THE SAME pattern that my father did, for years, before he killed himself.
Hiding bottles.
Forgetting where I hid the bottle.
Being surprised to find a bottle I had hidden days, or weeks, before.
Getting rid of bottles.
Feeling lousy much of the time.
Knowing that I was letting myself, and everyone else, down.
Realizing that I was letting my mother's destructiveness be enacted in my own life, fueling my own self-destruction.
Watching the permissible "start drinking time" roll back from 5pm, to 4pm, to anytime that was getting pretty close to 4pm.
Feeling the crazy disconnect between my professional existence as a healer, and my private existence as a person actively self-destructing.

[Seacailin]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

I am a Nurse and work for an agency, so I am always "on call". I cannot be depended upon to cover sick calls etc....when I have been drinking.

[Ibelieve]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

So Clear

Dear All

i have read this whole thread today and will continue to do. For so long i thought i was alone and these were MY HABITS but there is a commonality in all of the postings and my actions. the glasses, the bottles (hidden and otherwise) the coffee mugs with wine, getting rid of the bottles. its funny to read these things now but when they were occuring they were just part on an ongoing treadmill that would not stop.

I am AFHF for 19 days and it is so delighful to just havemore time (alert and awake that is)

However- the thing i hated the most was the overwhelming GUILT that consumed me day in and day out. If i wasn't thinking about drinking i was feeling quilty about drinking or both at the same time !!


warm regards, Diane

[SpiritGirl]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

:bump:

[retteacher]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

I'm going to read this thread through again. It's such a wake-up call. I know I've probably shared these things, but, for me, they bear repeating:
-hiding bottles.
-drinking alone.
-getting rid of bottles.
-sneaking extra drinks...even at someone else house.
-skimming alcohol from my parents' supply.
-blacking out.
-ruining great parties for myself.
-throwing up.
-hangovers.
-guilt & misery.
-lying.

That's just the few I could remember quickly. I'm sure there are more. I absolutely need to see the seamy side of drinking. The romance that we see depicted of TV etc. is false, false, false for me.

Mary

[Cinders]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

Now that I have some sobriety under my belt and am feeling so physically well, despite my health issues...

I hated dealing with the:

Self-loathing when I failed.
Anxiety, anxiety, anxiety.
The shakes and tremors.
The stress.
Becoming a liar and a sneak.

Today, despite worries, stress at work, etc. I am much calmer and serene.

When my brain tries to send me those thoughts about drinking, I just tell it, go away, I don't want to go there anymore!!

I love being sober way more than I miss the drink.

Love,
Cindi

[retteacher]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

Cindi: I forgot about the anxiety. For me, it was down-right fear, & it permeated my whole life. I eventually got to the point where I couldn't drive on the highway (not under the influence) wo/almost having a panic attack. Just the fear of being "discovered" was paralyzing. Thank God I'm out from under that. Mary

[USMgirl]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

This a great thread!!! I think I will read it through every morning!!!

What I hate most is the 'WASTE.' I wasted so many years of health, happiness, opportunities, relationships, laughter, joys, good deeds,.....whoa, it's just all been a waste of time and opportunity to do better things for myself, my family, my community and my faith.
I HATE that when I started to drink, I was in incredible physical shape. Damn it all! The weight gain, ugly belly fat over my liver! And the bloat! UGH!!!!!!!
Man, that felt GOOD to type out!!!!!

[retteacher]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

Also the waste of money.

[SpiritGirl]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

:bump: I keep bumping this because it is such a great thread and a healthy reminder for me when my brain starts to feel better after being AF and I "forget"... Just want to share for anyone else it might encourage....

Hope everyone is preparing for a great, SOBER or moderate weekend.... I know I could use the support!!

[CS04]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

I agree, SG, it is a great thread. How do you "bump" it, though? There are others that I'd like to try.

[IAD]

What I HATE, LOATH, and JUST CAN'T STAND about drinking.

Having to put up with posts like this one ! Ha1 IAD.